Serena: We ate and drank and jumped into the ocean naked and said I love you then went to church and had a ceremony in Spanish and I think I said, "Si."
Okay, Ross and Rachel, we've heard that story before. Actually it reminds me of that episode of Full House in season four where DJ and a Greek kid named Sylvio walk around the kitchen table a couple of times and this means they're married according to some weird tradition from Greece. Remember that one? It's worth looking up. Serena, please tell me you and Gabriel did not walk around a kitchen table in Spain. Dan's jealous that she ran away and accidentally married this guy while he's stuck waiting tables at a Seder in the Waldorf house. Good grief.
Nate is up to something at the rehearsal dinner. All we know is that he plans on not talking to his grandfather. Blair is quietly freaking out. When Nate brushes passed his Grandpa without even a polite hello, Gramps asks Blair what's up. Is there a problem? No, she says. She just needs a few minutes.
Turns out Lily invited herself over to the Seder along with Rufus. She knew a rich art collector would be there so she tricked Rufus into going so he could try and sell art. Rufus is kinda pissed.
Rufus: That guy's a jerk. I'm not selling art to him.
Lily: Good luck with Yale, idiot.
Enter Dan. Great. His dad asks why he's here and before he can confess that he got a job without his dad's permission, Serena swoops in and says she invited him. Of course, Lily is not happy to find that her daughter has left the house. But she doesn't want to cause a scene during the Seder so the conversation will be put on hold until further notice. But that probably won't happen. The next scene is already awkward.
Eleanor: Why are you here, Serena?
Lily: Blair invited her.
Eleanor: Weird. She never planned on being here. Dan you look like shit. Clean yourself up and get the wine.
Rufus: That was rude.
Dan: Eh.
Jenny and Wes play a rousing game of Monopoly (Oh Jenny and her board games). Chuck and the ballerina walk in and start humping up against the wall and then leave for the bedroom.
The Seder is about to begin! Serena tries to apologize to Dan while Eleanor screams his name like the ugly stepsister yelling for Cinderella. "Dan! Get the food!"
Blair confronts Tripp at the rehearsal dinner. Did he say something to Nate to convince him to go to Columbia? Before she can get answer, Nate begins his unexpected toast. It went something like this.
Nate: Fuck you, Grandpa!
Then he tells the sob story about his Grandpa having his dad investigated by the authorities, thus destroying his family. If only we all had the chance to mockingly toast our dysfunctional families. I propose this should be the new Thanksgiving tradition.
A surprise guest shows up at the Seder. Hunky hunk Gabriel! Dan looks like a cute little hobbit next him. Gabe (this is what I'm calling him now) is looking for Serena, his maybe-wife. Dan walks into the middle of the dinner and whispers to Serena she must come out there. The adults eye them suspiciously.
She's shocked to see Gabriel and asks him to leave, but he's persistent. I think he's supposed to be endearing, but mostly he comes across as obsessive. Finally Serena just tells him that Dan is her boyfriend. Dan plays along. Gabriel doesn't understand why she never mentioned Dan before. Her plan to get rid of him almost works until Eleanor comes in, looks Gabe up and down and invites him to the Seder. The more crazy strangers, the merrier!
Then Flo Rida's "Right Round" starts playing loudly. It kind of distracts me and I almost miss the confrontation between Blair and Grandpa V. She's got five minutes to fix this, he tells her. But she's not so sure about this old goober anymore.
Back at the Seder, things are heating up. No one is paying attention to Cyrus. Lily asks Gabriel if he's the one who went to Spain with Serena and Poppy. Snooty Art Collector grills Rufus about his artists. Dan serves wine and no one can figure out if he's a waiter, a guest, or Serena's boyfriend. And Flo Rida continues to play in the background. Serena asks Dan to sit next to her and awkwardly grabs his hand.
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Comments (3)
I was hoping the inevitable experimental girl on girl storyline was going to heat up when Blair was laying between Serena's legs. No dice. Do the hairstylists hate Serena/Blake because her hair was looking pretty awful?
1 of 3 | Posted by newcastlefan | Posted on April 27, 2009 5:49 AM
The nightmare was a knock-off of "My Fair Lady". It even had the same crappy cockney accents. All of Blaire's dreams/nightmares are set like Audrey Hepburn movies. Anyway great recap!
2 of 3 | Posted by kittkatt357 | Posted on April 27, 2009 12:02 PM
Oh and I hate Serena can the next storyline be about Georgina Killing here and having extensive plastic surgery to take over her life? I noticed on the previews that Georgie was back.
3 of 3 | Posted by kitkatt357 | Posted on April 27, 2009 12:04 PM