Dan is now meeting with his cliched, scotch-swilling mentor, who thinks his writing is crap. Haha, yay! Evidently every story is about Dan/Serena drama, and the mentor is just as bored as us viewers were. I feel your pain, sir. The mentor tells him to get out of his comfort zone, and find someone dangerous to learn things from. While I'd like to see Dan tag along with Eric and get roughed up in a gay bar, I think it's pretty clear that Chuck and Dan will be hanging out. After all, we know Chuck's social calendar is free.
"I would rather let you try to shoot this glass off my head than read another one of your stories."
At Eleanor's, Laurel is unhappy with the seating chart, thinking there aren't enough It girls in the crowd. Kirsten Dunst might be showing her bony, vampire-ass, but she is soooo 2007. Gotta love a random attack on a Hollywood starlet! Eleanor explains that they can't get the It girls because her show is the same time as the Marc Jacobs show, and his clothes don't look like costumes from your 1st grader's First Thanksgiving pageant. Overhearing, Jenny mentions that Serena and her new friend Poppy may be able to help.
Dan has arrived at the VDW-Bass residence to ask Chuck if they can go play together. Launching into his explanation, Dan says that he needs to get out of his comfort zone and experience new things. Chuck, looking quite hot again in this scene, asks the obvious question without blinking an eye -- "Are you gay?" Haha. Caught off guard, Dan explains that he is not, but wants to get out of Brooklyn and experience the world of Chuck Bass. Thinking, Chuck finally agrees and orders Dan to come along before he changes his mind. Hope Dan brought along the essentials for a night with Chuck -- condoms, clean underwear, a switchblade, and an eggplant.
Back at home, Blair is channeling Jan Brady as she wails at Duroda that it's all "Serena, Serena, Serena!" with the minions lately, and that high school girls are spoiled, stupid, and ungrateful. Like a good servant, Duroda keeps her mouth shut and merely offers Blair some tea rather than address the hypocrisy of that loaded statement. Deciding that she will leave the minions outside to get covered in paint by insane PETA protesters, B grabs the seating chart -- only to see that changes have already been made and Serena and Poppy are now in the front row with Mr. Orange himself, Michael Kors. Blair begins screaming at full volume, while Duroda looks scared out of her little skull cap. B demands to know who made the changes, and Duroda hesitantly offers that she heard it was Jenny. Livid, Blair declares that it's time Little J got a refresher course on why it's a bad idea to fuck with Blair.
"You're not going to beat me again, are you Miss Blair? The scabs only just healed."
Eleanor arrives home, and a now-calm Blair confronts her mother about the seating chart. Blair insists that Poppy will want to go to Marc Jacobs, and Serena would never abandon their backstage ritual. But sorry B, Eleanor's already spoken to Lily, and in between ignoring Lily's desperate pleas for friendship, she learned from Lily that Serena and Poppy agreed to the plan. Blair makes a snide comment about Jenny's involvement, and Eleanor begins singing Little J's praises while Blair tries to hide her hurt expression. But then Eleanor reveals some interesting information -- Jenny doesn't go to school and supposedly has an "independent study." Blair knows that's a bigger pile of crap than Eleanor's fashions, and turns to share this information with the Constance officials just as Jenny herself arrives with Laurel. B briefly confronts Jenny about the seating chart, while a bewildered Jenny explains she didn't know Blair had made the original. Not like Blair gives a shit about that minor detail.
Dan and Chuck have begun their night of debauchery, with Chuck silently ordering a tray of six shots just as they sit down. Dan begins spouting off his judgmental bullshit, and Chuck merely orders him to shut up while sliding the entire tray at Dan and offering Dan a little blue pill. Dan hesitates and annoyingly pops his jaw a few times while Chuck tells him to shit or get off the pot. Dan finally gives in, chasing the pill with the shots. If this can make Dan slightly less annoying, I'm all for him getting fucked up.
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Comments (11)
The only thing that could have made this episode worse is if that slut Cabbage Patch had made a cameo.
Oh, and I'm not even going to ask why you've seen dirty Hermione and Ginny fanfic.
1 of 11 | Posted by heygirl | Posted on October 6, 2008 1:13 AM
Congrats! The Cubs won as many playoff games as the Cardinals this year >:)
I love ur recaps despite ur love of the Cubbies. Is it just me, or did this episode seem like the start of a totally different season than the last few (i.e. no cougar, nate, vanessa, brit guy, dan/serena drama etc)??
I personally think the Lily secret was a Rufus/Lily sexy photoshoot thingy (gag)...since nothing in this show ends up neaarly as good as the antipation for the reveal.
And yeah, Serena needs lessons from Miss Jay.
2 of 11 | Posted by kellyhp12 | Posted on October 6, 2008 2:08 AM
This was not a great episode.
Blair was annoying and Serena all of a sudden being a socialite party girl was a little too random for me. I would've liked that plot line to actually happen on the show instead of just being mentioned as an afterthought.
And the whole Chuck has no friends thing kind of came out of nowhere for me, too.
I was so glad to have a Vanessa-free episode, though. It was refreshing to make it through an entire episode with no one dressed like a Garbage Pail Kid.
3 of 11 | Posted by cherin | Posted on October 6, 2008 5:54 AM
great recap. blair and jenny NEED to take serena down asap.
sorry about the cubs. i'm a die hard mets fan. i feel your pain. trust me.
4 of 11 | Posted by baymenxpac | Posted on October 6, 2008 7:31 AM
Loved the recap but you penis worship chuck too much dude. The best thing about both blair and chuck is that they are bad ass and do whatever the fuck they want, but deep down thy both are much better people than the "heroes" like Serena or The Brooklynites. If Chuck is awesome for being shady then you can't say Blair is an immature brat for pretty much doing similar actions. Its called a double standard, which is why no matter how much i love chuck, i love Blair more, its so refreshing to see a female character that doesnt just go with the flow.
And word about a possible Blair/Jenny friendship, leighton and taylor are five times prettier than that buttterface Blake, not to mention better actors.
A shirtless Dan/Nate fight would pretty much be the greatest thing ever for those characters, chuck maybe interesting but hes fug as hell
5 of 11 | Posted by lbonnerz | Posted on October 6, 2008 1:26 PM
Dude, loved your recap but you penis worship chuck WAY too much. Hes ace but you cant condone his shady actions and rip on Blair's,its a double standard. The best thing about both of them is that they are bad ass with a heart of gold and probably better ppl deep down than the actual "heroes" of the show.
Thats why I will always love blair more than chuck, most TV shows have a bad boy like chuck in them but it is so refreshing to see a character like blair who doesnt take shit lying down and takes action unlike most boring females. What makes that coupling so compelling is that you can equally appreciate both sides of it.
BJ need to take Serena down ASAP, as immature blair was the entire episode, she owned up to it in the end unlike that twat serena. Not to mention that Taylor and Leighton are 1000 times more attractive than that butterface Blake....not to mention they can actually act as well.
PS, I'm bummed about the cubs too! But yay for ppl from Chicago!
6 of 11 | Posted by lbonnerz | Posted on October 6, 2008 1:31 PM
lbonnerz, I agree... Serena/Blake falls into my category of "people who are unattractive but people think they're hot because they're skinny and have blonde hair"
7 of 11 | Posted by cherin | Posted on October 6, 2008 1:41 PM
To be fair, Blake Lively looks a lot better after her nose job.
Anyway, I really really liked this episode. Though probably just because of the lack of Nate and surplus of Blair and Chuck.
Btw thanks for that screencap of Dan's paper: truly hilarious.
8 of 11 | Posted by alex_w | Posted on October 6, 2008 7:28 PM
Alex, Blake does look a little better with a nose job but shes still pretty average to me, ppl just get distracted with her enormous and probably fake breasts and her long hair. Her make up in GG is always atrocious too, in the scene where she told Blair she killed someone all I could do was look at her clown face and think "Buzz, your girlfriend, WOOF!"
I used to really like Blake but she seems totally fake now, Ive also hear alot of rumors about her being the onset diva and not leighton. Apparently, she refuses to be photographed unless she has a full face of make up on...wonder what shes hiding
9 of 11 | Posted by Lbonnerz | Posted on October 7, 2008 12:09 PM
Hi Lolo!
I really miss your "I Want to Work for Diddy" blog!!! Are there ever going to be any more recaps of it?
10 of 11 | Posted by fierytopaz | Posted on October 7, 2008 12:51 PM
heygirl -- that's a really good question for my friend that forwarded it to me (the Harry/Snape stuff's even worse).
kellyhp12 -- you are a cruel woman. But at least you're not a Sox fan. :)
I agree with a lot of you that this episode felt out of sync by dropping ongoing storylines completely and making sudden announcements, like Serena's friendship with Poppy.
lbonnerz -- haha I probably do let Chuck get away with too much. I'll try to check myself in the future. As for my criticism of Blair this ep, I just expect better of her. I rarely expect better of Chuck.
And I agree that while she's objectively attractive, Blake Lively's hotness rating can definitely be attributed to a great figure and long blonde hair. Leighton Meester, on the other hand, it truly beautiful. So is Jessica Szohr, when I get past wanting to punch her in the face and actually look at her. Taylor Momsen's a bit awkward-looking, but she's only 15 and still growing into her features.
And fierytopaz -- I did have to stop recapping Diddy due to real-life craziness this fall and already having another recap assignment. Flipit and I tried to find a replacement, but everyone was just as busy. However, since last night was the finale and GG was a rerun this week, I am planning on doing a recap of the last episode. Sorry I can't do more, but I appreciate you asking!!!
11 of 11 | Posted by LoLo | Posted on October 7, 2008 1:32 PM