And then for some reason everyone's all depressed and won't stand at the end of graduation. I'm not sure why the rest of the class cared that five people were embarrassed via email. And then Serena's like, "Gossip Girl is going down!"
They're all afraid Gossip Girl is gonna reveal all the dirty secrets no one knows about yet. So they go off to do damage control. Also, Rufus and Lily talk yet again about their failed relationship and nothing new is said and I'm not even posting a picture because I'm so tired of them. Nate goes over to his grandpa to tell him about a secret he thinks might get out. The convo is classic.
Nate: I have a secret to share.
Gramps: Ooh, do tell.
Nate: Last summer I had an affair with an older woman.
Gramps: That's my boy!
Nate: She was married.
Gramps: Sexy!
Nate: And she paid me.
Gramps: Gross. Good luck with that.
Then Chuck enters the room and Nate breaks the news that he and Blair broke up. Meanwhile, Vanessa is talking about how lame the party is and Dan actually utters the phrase, "There's a killer donut place around the corner." This kid is 18 going on 65. I think he was about to suggest playing shuffle board at the local senior center, but Serena interrupted. And she's wearing a very boobalicious dress.
Serena: We've got to take down Gossip Girl!
Dan: I'm kinda over it.
Serena: High school is over, but you're my friend.
Dan: Not really.
Serena: What the hell?
Dan: Well, you know, we're going to different schools and our parents are breaking up and stuff. See ya later.
The A-Team huddles together on a small staircase to discuss their plan of attack on Gossip Girl. After careful consideration, they've deduced that G-Girl has to be someone in their graduating class. But who could it be? The whole thing is very Saved by the Bell.
Serena gets the bright idea to send a text/email thing to Gossip Girl, this way when someone's phone beeps, they'll know who it is. I guess every single senior happens to be in a same room? The only phone that beeps belongs to Eric's nerdy friend, Jonathan. Gossip Girl is a boy!!!!!!!!!
False alarm. Jonathan is not G-girl. He and Eric just hacked into her computer one boring summer and can now read her emails. That's it. Lame. Turns out there's a bunch of untold gossip sitting in her inbox. Jenny finds one piece of info that could win her the crown as Queen Bee, thereby giving her the ability to crush the teen monarchy forever! But she's reluctant to do it, and they don't tell us what it is, so now we're supposed to care about what she found out.
Rufus plays the guitar out in the living room just like old times when he was a musician and people cared. Cowboy Dan comes out to say he's not going to Nate's party, but Cap'n Rufus bestows his knowledge upon him: Go to the high school party or you may regret it.
Dan exits. Cue Lily:
Ruf: What are you doing here?
Lily: I felt old and wanted to feel young. Wanna feel young with me?
Ruf: Huh?
Lily: I brought weed. I stole it from Chuck's room.
Ruf: Righteous.
Blair and her mom have some quaint mother-daughter moment that lasts for about 3 seconds. Then we're at Nate's party, where the token Asian chick does a terrible impression of drunk. She's clearly carrying around an empty cup. You can tell by the way she's tossing it all around. She even makes an almost love confession to Dan. Comic relief, I guess?
Jenny spots Blair and tells her that Gossip Girl knows "about New Year's." Dun dun dun! Blair doesn't care. They exchange heated words. Jenny tells two of the mean girls that she's ready to share her juicy gossip. And we still don't care.
Blair proceeds to seduce Chuck in an awkward forced sort of way. Remember that episode of Friends where Monica decides to strip for Chandler after some sort of stripper mishap and she's all, "Ooh, these tennis shoes are so tight?" It's like that. Blair tries to trick Chuck into saying "I love you" but he doesn't. In fact he checks his phone instead.
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Comments (6)
I love your little ad libbed conversations between characters. They are always so entertaining.
I can't believe you found this to be 'meh'. I loooooved it, especially the parts with Blair and Chuck.
1 of 6 | Posted by alex_w | Posted on May 23, 2009 1:31 PM
Oooo-make Chuck a Vampire! That would add something to the show.
Then he could bite Serena and throw her into a tanning bed a *poof* no more mumbling!
Your Father may be onto something there.
*Now a word from the Sponsor*
'Hi I play Vanessa on Gossip Girl'
I would like you to meet Jen, she is an 'uptown girl with downtown tastes and a addiction to making coffee.
Gee, that sounds like someone we all know.
Jen has everywhere to go and no explaintions of why she is anywhere.'
.....
Also, lamest graduation ceremony ever. They might as well of had them at a party saying 'I loved the ceremony!'
Talk about not using a budget..
2 of 6 | Posted by hoxharding | Posted on May 23, 2009 7:26 PM
When Nate was telling his grandfather that his cougar had been paying for his services, I couldn't help but remember Nate & his ma were destitute and squatting in their own mansion, and it was.... that guy who didn't lift a finger to help them. Grandpa Dearest. I guess he's forgiven.
Why was Gossip Girl so mad at Serena? The whole A-Team schemed to find out who she was.
I'm with you -- it was meh. Great recap though! Thanks!
3 of 6 | Posted by Memememe | Posted on May 23, 2009 11:22 PM
Hahah, I love this recap. I sort of thought it was better than "eh" but that might be because I like Chuck and Blair together, so the ending was good for me.
How can Georgina just request Blair as a roommate and get her (because you know they will be roommates next year)? Both people have to request each other where I go...but I don't live in the Upper East Side, so...
And I kind of dig Scott, so he can hang out next season and I'd be okay with that.
4 of 6 | Posted by kelsey | Posted on May 24, 2009 6:18 PM
recap is ok and funny, but i nearly lost it when you suggested that jack and chuck MAY be related...it was like so many episodes, which were basically about jack being chucks uncle?!
well. you're right with the lipstick, its disgusting.
5 of 6 | Posted by mila superstar | Posted on August 30, 2009 5:37 PM
I used to love Gossip Girl but now its just getting a bit over the top.
Recent episodes just keep getting more and more ridiculous. Don't get me wrong - I'm going to always be tuning in to GG, but just wanted to throw it out there that this season has been a liiiiittle much.
Anyway, in my never-ending pursuit for new shows to tune into, I found
this online reality show about students in NYU. I watched the trailer
on YouTube and thought it seemed interesting, especially b/c it's
filmed by actual NYU students (main site: underthearch.tv)
For all of you who want to check it out their YouTube page, here ya go:
www.youtube.com/user/UndertheArchTV
I think the show has some good potential! Had anyone heard buzz
about it yet?
6 of 6 | Posted by LS1788 | Posted on October 15, 2009 12:28 PM