If I looked that much like a gargoyle, I'd probably downplay that resemblance as much as possible instead of developing a personality to match.

Bahahaha, alex, that was excellent!

I can't stand Andrea and I am ashamed to say that we share a first name...

I am really liking Danny. I thought at first that he was just a cocky jackass, but the fact that he didn't say a word about his dish being sent up instead of Ben's made me change my mine. You KNOW Ben would never have kept his mouth shut if the situation were reveresed.

I also like Paula, I think. I don't recall her having ever fucked up majorly.

And of course, Robert makes me laugh, but I don't think he'll win.

And here is my dream menu:

Appetizers:
Crab Cakes with Tomato Chutney
Goat Cheese Salad (made with spinach, almonds, bacon, warm goat cheese and a cranberry port dressing)
A Seafood Selection - bacon wrapped scallops, grilled prawns and smoked salmon slivers

Entrees:
Cedar Planked Pacific Chinook Salmon with a Yogurt-Dill dressing
Tenderloin Medallion (Alberta beef, OF COURSE) with wild mushroom sauce and potatoes au gratin
Grilled rack of lamb with mint sauce, served with garlic mashed potatoes

Desserts:
New York Cheesecake with your choice of blueberry, raspberry or strawberry compote
Chocolate Dipped Profiteroles with Vanilla Bean Gelato and Chocolate Sauce
Chocolate Lava Cake

YUM.

And yes, I am a complete culinary nerd. I LOVE to cook, the Food Network is one of my favorite channels, I idolize Emeril Lagasse and I pore over cookbooks like they're the newest Harry Potter. Or whatever.

Perhaps I should have been a chef...

Great recap! You make this show even funnier than it is.

By the way, there are also yellow (or golden) beets in addition to red ones.

Keep up the good work!

Just an advisory. If I ever go into a restaurant and see either "PrettyGirl" or Ben in the kitchen I am turning around and walking out. With Danny, well I guess I would say I am a fan of his, but I would vote him as the Chef most likely to be able to hook you up with a bag of meth.

What I'd like to know... how do you get in to Hell's Kitchen for a dinner? Do you request tickets? Do you have to blow JP? What does it take?

This episode just confirmed to me that none of these people are able to run a high volume, high standard restaurant. I suppose the contracts they win from the show allows the hotels in question to terminate incompetent chefs while the TV network pays the salaries and fees associated with winning the contest.

It's amazing to me how many of these people smoke and still expect to be competent chefs. I used to smoke and the chef I worked for at the time constantly scolded me for it. And that was 20 years ago. Knowing what we know now, I'm surprised that the show populates its contestants with so many smokers. Maybe it makes for better drama, I don't know, but nobody seems to have mentioned it but LA when they were all doing the taste test.

So far, I'm still sticking with my prediction of Paula, Giovanni or Robert.

Danny's the guy I'd most likely hang around with, though. He's a good cook, but he's not a leader. Ben is a leader but an average cook.

To be successful, you have to be both. Nobody in this season has what it takes. Still, it is entertaining.

@ georgiababe...

Those are good choices when you're running a local restaurant catering to local flavors. And you are charging reasonable prices for a reasonable plate of food.

However, if you're eating at a trendy, cutting edge eatery and possibly paying up to $400 for a complete dinner for two, you are expecting much, much higher standards for both service and food.

While I, too, love watching the Food Network, I can guarantee you that Chef Ramsay is not serving any of the recipes found on the average Food Network show. Chefs in Ramsay's class create the cookbooks which the rest of us follow.

They are creative, culinary artists on a level which the majority of us will never reach. That's why it's so funny to hear Ben talk about what a great chef he is. I doubt he's ever created an original dish that tasted extraordinary.

Darling Pottymouth,

Great Recap!!

I think its going to come down to Andrea, Gio and Danny (I would name Robert, but I suspect he's about an inch away from a full on coronary), with Gio taking it.

Hugs,
Yenta

"It's amazing to me how many of these people smoke and still expect to be competent chefs."

Go to any culinary school grounds and you will see most of the students in their free time between classes smoking.

Most chefs smoke in the states as does most of the waitstaff.

"how do you get in to Hell's Kitchen for a dinner? Do you request tickets? Do you have to blow JP? What does it take?
"

fox.com/hellskitchen has the get reservations to hell's kitchen widget.

What's funny is that people actually think that Season 5 right now is better then Season 4 when at first people were saying that Season 4 had a better group or people say the opposite.

Wonderful job Potty Mouth!

Andrea has been pissing me off more and more each week. Between her smirking and faux leadership, she drives me nuts. Hope she's next.

In answer to your question "who would answer yes when Chef Ramsay says 'are you a fucking idiot?'" I suspect Ben would, when he gets caught up in yelling YES CHEF to everything Ramsay says... Ben is truly delusional about his own abilities - but he's not a total ass to everyone, like Andrea is.

I think it will come down to Gio and Danny. So far, Gio has demonstrated a bit more leadership. Danny should have spoken up for own crab dish, and both he and Robert should have tied Ben down when he insisted on ruling the blue menu.

Great job, thanks Potty Mouth! oxox

@ Streaker

Oh, I know. Most of those dishes that I listed wouldn't get higher than $40 a plate.

But I prefer it that way. I find that really expensive restaurants just aren't as good. The food that I've had at those places is usually weird. It looks beautiful, but I'm just not interested. Give me a steak over that any day.

Danny looks like Eddie Cahill (CSI: Miami) to me.

Here’s my fantasy menu:

Appetizer:
Greek Lemon Chicken Soup (my own recipe)
Pepper crusted Ahi
Mini French Dips with Swiss Cheese and Horseradish Sauce

Entrée:
Bacon crusted Filet Mignon with Twice-baked potatoes
Cream and Curry Chicken with Parmesan Cous Cous (my own recipe)
Salmon in a Butter and Wine Sauce with Asparagus tips

Dessert:
Key Lime Pie
Mississippi Mud Cake (family recipe)
Petit fours with lemon and raspberry centers

I loved the recap…but completely lost it when I got to “You say that I'm an idiot ass clown. (yes, we all say that you're an idiot ass clown)” And, yes…I was singing the lines out loud.

"school dinner" = "school lunch" in British. They call their lunch ladies "dinner ladies."

Great recap! These people are so inept.

@cattyfan: Loooove Greek Lemon chicken Soup!!

LOL, PottyMouth! Every time you get a shot of Ben and his snaggle-teeth I lose my shit! I have always felt like the "contestants" on this show have been not nearly as accomplished as those that apply for Food Network challenges, or even Top Chef, it seems like the people that make it through are the big personalities (or in Robert's case, the big asses). Great job, can't wait to see next week!

love, J-Mo :)

J-Mo, I was thinking the exact same thing about the contestants. They seem a step below the Top Chef ones. Actually, make that 3steos below.

PottyMouth - I just have to ask. Was that a Mommie Dearest reference in there? "That. Is a lie." My brother & I used to say that stuff to each other all the time in the 80s. That & Flash Gordon lines.

alex_w: LMFAO!

georgiababe: You made my tummy growl with your menu.

arizonatom: Ahhhh – thank you. I loathe beets, so I was unaware of the golden variety.

Snortles: I agree. I always wonder if the places these people work at lose business after they’ve been on the show.

Streaker: It would be interesting to know how many of the winners on this show have actually held the job they won. I know the first season winner Michael was supposed to intern with Ramsay and never ended up going. Anyone want to look into this?

Yenta: I really hope you’re wrong and Andrea doesn’t make it to the final three. I can’t stand her.

yeschef: Thanks for posting the info about reservations!

njgasmifan: Hahahaha, I suspect you’re right about Ben answering yes to the are you stupid question. Andrea drives me nuts too (I know it’s hard to tell).

cattyfan: Thanks! Somehow I seem to end up thinking about songs a lot when these eliminations are going on, and it’s so much fun when I think of a song that can be tied in to what’s going on. Glad you enjoyed it.

rubinia: I should have known it was a culture difference. Thanks for setting me straight!

J-Mo: I am in complete agreement about the level of the competitors here versus other shows. Keep an eye out when Robert gets eliminated. I have some “slightly special” planned for you!

ReeseWitherspoon: YES!!!! My sister and I are always throwing movie lines out at each other, and that is an all time favorite! I’m so glad you caught it. Flash Gordon….wow, that’s another one with some great lines. I may have to go rewatch that one.

Thanks for taking the time to share your comments with me. I look forward to reading them every week!

Another movie with a ton of quotable lines is Heathers...anyone else with me on this one??

I am definitely with you, wintersux. LOVE that movie. Another quotable favorite is The Princess Bride!

best. elimination. EVAH!

bwahahahaha (cackle cackle)

Great recap, PM.

@cattyfan: Greek Lemon chicken Soup - your own recipe?? How can that be? There are only 4 ingredients in Avogolemono Soup (lemon juice, chicken stock, egg and orzo - maybe some chicken breast...)

Anyhoo, I am not gonna post my dream menu bc the menu I would concoct and execute at home for, say 6 people is a great deal different to one you have to execute for a room full of diners.

In other words, I have no idea how to expedite a real resto menu.

Yes, there are golden beets as well as red ones. They are delicious and very pretty on the plate.

Beet & chevre salad?! Tres ordinaire!! Goat's cheese salads are sooooo 90s!

@wintersux -- fave Heather's quote: "I love my dead gay son!!"

If you liked Heathers, you might wanna check out Death to Smoochy -- so many quotable lines. Such an underrated and roaringly funny movie!

@ Snortles: "With Danny, well I guess I would say I am a fan of his, but I would vote him as the Chef most likely to be able to hook you up with a bag of meth."

holy crap -- HOW TRUE!!

It's kinda scary, but isn't he the most likely to win?

In other words -- as chefs & people, they all SUCK unwiped arse!

Donna Martin Graduates!

Lemon juice, chicken stock, egg, and chicken breast is the basic recipe...but it gets more than that. Rice, bay leaves, grated carrots, onion powder, pepper, salt, parsley...and the quantities make a huge difference.

I love cooking!

^ hmmnnn cattyfan -- sounds interesting. The recipe I have just has the basic ingredients I listed, but I have actually never attempted to make this soup.

I like that you took something trad and kicked it up. Thanks for putting me straight!

"Streaker:
What I'd like to know... how do you get in to Hell's Kitchen for a dinner? Do you request tickets? Do you have to blow JP? What does it take?"

My partner works in game shows, and one of her producers got to be a diner once, a couple years ago. You are paid $50. The only thing you're guaranteed is: You get all the bread you can eat, and some wine. And that's it, if it's a bad night in the kitchen. You may be there for hours and hours and hours and HOURS, for $50 and a guarantee of eating only bread and water, and maybe wine if you're lucky. They definitely recommended eating before showing up. It's casted, just like every other 'reality' (i.e. GAME show). It's knowing someone or checking on when casting is done.