Testimonials

Now it's time for silly season. Gordo gets all overdramatic as he lists off some of the world's greatest rivalries - Yankees vs. Red Sox, Tyson vs. Holyfield, but now it's time for Matt vs. Ben. Sure, Rams, totally the same thing. I'm sure that Cringing Matt and Mustache Ben have a place reserved for them in the history books right between the Civil War and the Magna Carta.

It's the final round, and it's set up a little different. Both Matt and Ben will taste something that Ramsay's made. The dish is a basic clam chowder and has 10 ingredients. They will taste it and then alternating players, list the ingredients. Each correct ingredient scores one point. Ben tastes it, and then does this chicken cluck face. The score is currently 5-1 in favor of the ladies, so he has a lot of ground to make up.

Both players do freakishly well -- better than I could have predicted. They tear through the ingredients, and I'm particularly surprised by Matt who holds his ground and keeps the ladies in the lead. The Red Team wins, and Matt is loving being with the women.

The Blue Team's punishment is to thoroughly clean the dorms while the women will be enjoying a luxury spa on the patio, complete with massages, mani/pedis and facials. Ben mutters a totally rude remark about Jen, saying "yeah you need to fix that weave." What a jerk. Even his "friend," the General does little to acknowledge this. In the beginning of the season, I really liked Ben. I thought that he seemed smart and talented. But I like him less each week because he's really gotten nasty and makes a lot of low blows.

The ladies and Matt run out to the patio in white robes, and with the wind and the jumping, I almost caught a glimpse of Corey's cooter. I'm so glad that it didn't turn out that way, though, because I'd love to keep my eyesight. They have champagne and enjoy their rewards.

It's pretty amusing watching the men scrub, vacuum and clean. Most amusing is Petrozza, who attacks the bathroom. He says that the bathroom is covered in women's hair and that someone must be losing a lot of hair. Yeah, it always seems that way because our hair is longer. One of our hairs equals ten man hairs. So it looks a whole lot worse. I shed all over my bathroom too. It's hard to keep up with, really.

On the deck, Matt gets a chocolate mask, and says he wishes they had an eyebrow wax, because "this metrosexual's gettin' done up." Metrosexual? I beg to differ. Yeah, he may prune those eyebrows back, but that's about where the physical maintenance seems to end.

As Matt's getting pampered, he says he's glad he switched teams. Jen says she's happy to have him. And then he says "someone's trash is someone's treasure," which totally makes me chuckle because it's like "Sesame Street's" golden rule or something equally childlike.

To pour salt on the men's wound, Chef Scott calls the house and tells Ben that the girls are thirsty, so he needs to bring them iced tea. Ben is a facetiously good sport about it. Except that he tells a chocolate-covered Matt that he looks like an idiot. Even while dipped in chocolate, Matt is STILL the least delcious looking thing on this show. Or in the world.

Fun time is over, and the teams go prep for dinner service. Matt says that this is his chance to show the RamJam that the problem in the Blue Kitchen is not him. I'm actually quite interested to see how this all pans out.

Hell's Kitchen is back to the fine dining menu and open for business. Ben is off to a rough start in the realm of communication. Rams reads off the orders and everyone answers but him. I don't know if Ben is confused, hard of hearing or just a jerk, but he is instantly put on Gordo's bad side.

Side note: Has anyone else noticed Toilet Brush's stubble on his chinny-chin-chin? Perhaps he's growing a little Brillo pad for those hard to reach toilet bowl areas.

In the Red Kitchen, Rosann is on appetizers and failing to deliver. Her first dish of scallops are only cooked on one side. And, you know, Matt is pretty nice to her about it too. He offers words of encouragement while Corey trash talks. Her next try is much better. As long as she can keep her mind not scatterbrained, she's cool. But the second she gets flustered, there is no getting that train back on its tracks.

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Posted in Hell's Kitchen , Hell's Kitchen by MandaMo at 11:45 AM | Permalink | Comments (11)
Last Comment: jaded on May 25, 2008 04:33 PM.