Meanwhile, Matt makes the best risotto of the night, and he totally freaks out. He's so excited that he eats it right out of the pan and begs Christina to taste it. Not wanting any of his cringey backwash, she denies him. Then, to make things even more ridiculous, he GIVES AN ACCEPTANCE SPEECH, thanking his wife, Ramsay, Gloria and Scott...for helping him be what he is today. He then goes on to thank the Academy, God and say "I can't believe that I won!" Okay, that last part is false, but he was definitely headed in that direction.
Ben is really having a bad night, cooking entrees far too slow. He has nothing ready on the ticket and doesn't even know how long it will take him. Ben says that it's because Rams flusters him, then he calls for Petrozza's help. Ben finally reports that they've run out of lamb, which I guess they've been out of for an hour and a half. Rams, of course, is furious that he didn't say anything sooner because now the orders have to be re-taken and yadda yadda.
And O.M.G., y'all! Rosann is still making raw food! What is going ON with our little New Yawker!? Why must she suck so badly!? I want to like her and want her to succeed, but she lets me down at every turn. She gets sniffly in the kitchen and then gets so flustered that she can't do anything at all.
Jen continues her moping and won't look at Chef when she talks to him. So he gets into her face and says she's far too cocky for someone who doesn't know anything. Word. In fact, Gordo gets so angry that he throws an entire serving tray of dishes onto the counter in front of Jen. Mostly because he's mad at Rosann though for not being able to get it together. But also because Jen is undirectable.
Rosann cries to us for letting herself and her daughter down. Again, this touches my heart, and I want to like her. But oh does she ever test me. I think it's certainly time for her to hang up her smock.
Two-and-a-half hours into dinner service, and food is completely stalled. But on the Blue side, Ben's Wellington is coming back to the window for not being well done. Gordon -- who is totally hanging by a thread as small as Toilet Brush's chin hair at this point -- throws it in front of Ben and violently kicks a trash can.
Ben commits a fatal sin by talking back to Chef. While Chef is yelling at him, Ben interrupts, saying, "Are we done? Because if we are, then I'd like to complete my station, Chef." I am sitting on the edge of my seat, completely terrified. I am SURE that Ramsay is about to dislocate his jaw and swallow Ben whole in one bloody bite.
SHUT IT DOWN!!!
After the disastrous, uncompleted dinner service, the teams line up in the Kitchen. Gordon says that tonight they were overconfident (Christina), slow (Rosann), lazy (Jen) and pathetic (Ben). The only chef who bounced back and did a great job was...(drum roll, please)...Matt. Rams asks why it took him so long to show his stuff. He barks that it's because the women listened to him and showed him respect.
The losing team is the men, and each individual will nominate one person for elimination.
Back at the house, the men consider their options. Ben says that he'll nominate himself, and the General says that he'll nominate himself, too, for solidarity. This is strategic on Ben's part. He thinks that if he guilts everyone into not selling anyone out, then he won't be nominated.
Toilet Brush disagrees with this plan because he doesn't think he deserves to be nominated at all. I mean, he made that kick-ass Caesar salad and all! That, and he's so spunky and cute. And has a hair cut that doubles as a cheese slicer. What's not to like?
In their room, Ben tells the General that they should tell Petrozza to nominate TB too and create an alliance voting bloc. Gen half-heartedly agrees, so Ben calls Petrozza into their room.
Petrozza, being an actual adult, refuses to nominate TB. Ben says that it was the Gen's idea, and then tries to persuade him by saying that TB has done nothing in the challenges.
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Comments (11)
ughhh. how embarrassing! this is the guiltiest pleasure show that i watch, yet i was compelled enough to read all the recaps (entertaining) and register, just so i can comment on:
"Meanwhile, Matt makes the best risotto of the night..."
NO! incorrect! SHUT IT DOWN!!! it was the best risotto to ever come out of the KITCHEN!! if i remember correctly.
anyways, i cringed when i read that part of the recap, and now i cant stop cringing. please, everyone, dont tell anyone i watch this show.
1 of 11 | Posted by sohail | Posted on May 19, 2008 3:21 PM
Actually, it looked like Matt was the one who chopped off his finger. If so, so much for him just being a scapegoat. By the way, the whole "I cut off the tip of my finger and can't find it." "Somebody check the pancetta!" was the best teaser in the history of television.
2 of 11 | Posted by Alafoss | Posted on May 19, 2008 3:22 PM
thank u for mentioning ben's chicken cluck while tasting the soup.. it irritated the hell out of me lol
excellent recap yet again ;)
3 of 11 | Posted by angelbayyb | Posted on May 19, 2008 6:35 PM
thank u for mentioning ben's chicken cluck while tasting the soup.. it irritated the hell out of me lol
excellent recap yet again ;)
4 of 11 | Posted by angelbayyb | Posted on May 19, 2008 6:58 PM
Looking at next week's preview, the bitch Corey wants to flex a little muscle.
As much as I don't like Jen, I hope she shuts her stupid blonde ass up.
5 of 11 | Posted by you you you | Posted on May 20, 2008 6:10 AM
Was it just me, or did Ben TOTALLY sound like Owen Wilson? I am so happy he's gone.
6 of 11 | Posted by Nora | Posted on May 20, 2008 1:29 PM
^ lol - now that you mention it... Ben *did* have a similar lazy (but not nearly as sexy) drawl.
Speaking of metrosexuals who prune their eyebrows -- um, Smurf?! (aka ToiletBrush) He and Danny Noriega could do a double drag act.
And ya know another Sesame Street chestnut? "Co-op-er-A-SHUN!"
hilarious recap, yet again, MandaMo. I have insomnia so I'm reading this in the middle of the night and I have to stifle my snorts of laughter so I don't wake my guy.
7 of 11 | Posted by Donna Martin Graduates! | Posted on May 21, 2008 3:24 AM
... but the peeing in my knickers was, for the most part, relatively silent.
8 of 11 | Posted by Donna Martin Graduates! | Posted on May 21, 2008 3:33 AM
Oh, and that firing squad/blind taste test challenge? I, too, was surprised by Matt's prowess here, but here's the thing:
I could easily rattle off about five or more of those ten ingredients without even tasting it.
You got your clam, your *mirepoix* (carrots, onions and celery), stock (probably fish), cream, maybe shallots ...
So, adding those guesses to what you actually can identify and subtracting what your opponent guesses, and you basically have the luck of the draw.
9 of 11 | Posted by Donna Martin Graduates! | Posted on May 21, 2008 3:41 AM
I agree, Donna Martin Graduates! I don't think they identified the ingredients because they genuinely tasted them. I think they realized it was clam chowder and simply listed the ingredients as they went along.
And boy, wouldn't I pay money to have Gordon Ramsay blindfold me and feed me?!
10 of 11 | Posted by coolbyrne | Posted on May 21, 2008 10:47 AM
Great recap, as always.
I was honestly shocked to see Matt not suck mud when switched to the red team. And I don't know what it says about me when I admit that he was decidedly less annoying than most other times. It could be that I was half listening to him as he rambled on to himself or the little leprechaun that sits on his shoulder as Chef was kicking Ben's ass all night.
After it's all said and done, I think Ben was the best candidate to vote off tonight. He truly did suck, so I'm beginning to think that Matt was just a scapegoat..
God, I think I need some sleep.
PS - Petrozza is my new hero. Finally, someone shows some class in this bunch.
11 of 11 | Posted by jaded | Posted on May 25, 2008 4:33 PM