Cut to Hell's Kitchen. Another delivery truck is honking. Gio looks up and says "I'm not running. I am not fucking running. I'll tell yous right off the bat." Hahaha.
Not only is Gio not running, he has decided to take a little snack break.
Everyone seems pretty annoyed that he's just disappeared. Gio tells us, "It was a long ass day today. I'm hungry, I'm tired, I'm getting cranky." I know the feeling. I get really cranky when I'm hungry and tired.
When he finally gets outside, Paula wants to know where the fuck he's been. His little snack does not seem to have improved his crankiness.
Back in San Francisco, they have arrived at One Market Restaurant. Ramsay tells them it has just won a Michelin star. Nice. They will be eating at the chef's table, which is in the kitchen. I'm jealous. I've always wanted to do a chef's table.
Ben knew they were in store for something extremely special. First course is wild nettle ravioli served over fresh California snails. Ben asks Robert what he thinks of his first extremely high end dining experience. Robert says it's delicious, and then spouts off some nonsense to us about popping collars and being up there with the richies. Wha?
Ramsay would like for them to take this experience and put it into practice when they get back to Hell's Kitchen. Yeah, that'll happen.
What are the losers up to? Well, funny you should ask. Another delivery truck has pulled up. Well, more like a delivery van. This one is dropping off twenty John Dory and thirty-six lobsters. Oh, and five cans of scallops. Oh. Did they only use fresh for the episode where they had to open them? Very interesting.
As they bring the boxes into the kitchen, Sous Chef Scott says he would open all the boxes and inspect all the fish to make sure they have gotten all that they are supposed to. Was it last year that they forgot to check and ended up with fish skeletons? Fun times.
While Danny's outside at the van signing off on the order, Paula says they only shipped thirty-four lobsters, not thirty-six. Sous Chef Gloria tells them they better go fucking catch that guy.
Gio's off and running, but will he make it in time? Danny's getting his copy of the invoice. The van driver is putting it into reverse, Gio runs out yelling, "Tell him to wait!" Now Danny is running after the van, it's all so suspenseful. Will he stop?
He does stop. And we cut back inside the kitchen to Andrea saying that there are thirty-six lobsters. Is it really that hard to count to thirty-six? Christ, my four year old can count that high.
Outside Gio is telling the driver he's not leaving the invoice the way it is. He wants credit for two lobsters. You tell him, Gio! Oh wait, don't tell him. Andrea is here to tell you that all the lobsters are in fact there. Well that makes you look a little foolish. How do you feel about that?
He walks back into the kitchen saying, "Hey! I got this great idea. The next delivery comes? How about we take two minutes, cause I'm tired of running back and forth, and I'm way too old for this shit, and we check it before we run it in."
Paula takes offense at that. She's irritated. She knows how to check in produce, she doesn't need someone to teach her how to check in produce. Then why did you say you were two short on lobsters?
Ben and Robert return from their trip. Ben decides it would be nice to share tales of his wonderful day with everyone. Yeah, that's always a solid plan. Everyone definitely wants to hear about the fabulous time you had while they were prepping and unloading deliveries. I have never understood why people do this. It just gets everyone annoyed at you.
He goes on and on and on and on, and I was thinking that any moment one of them was going to kill him. Robert is giving him a look like "Shut up dude", but he continues to tell his epic tale. What a dummy. Then he says he's not trying to rub it in. Seriously, dude! Do yourself a favor and shut up.
Gio says it all (but to us, not Ben): "Shut the fuck up, eat your Cheerios, smoke a cigarette, go fuck yourself." I think he's really glad you had a good time, Ben.
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Comments (10)
Funny recap, as usual... but I'm sure you tire of hearing that all the time.
Ugh! One of my three picks to win was eliminated!
Gio...! What happened, man? Well, it's not like I thought he could run a "top class" restaurant, anyway.
It stinks that two of my three picks to win were singled out for elimination- Robert and Giovanni. At least my other pick, Paula, was the one who had to choose the candidates for elimination.
If anyone's interested in what's happened with previous Hell's Kitchen winners, you should check out the Wikipedia entry for the show. I'd post the URL here, but it's not allowed.
1 of 10 | Posted by Streaker | Posted on April 13, 2009 3:20 AM
Great recap, but a blah episode generally. I guess this thing is Paula's to win if she can keep her head out of her arse.
2 of 10 | Posted by Snootchy Bootches | Posted on April 13, 2009 4:03 AM
Great recap for a piss-poor episode, PottyMouth! I bet Gordon would love to set fire to the casting director right about now. I wouldn't want any of those morons running my top-notch restaurant. Especially Ben. How annoying is that idiot?
I did like seeing the softer side of JP -- too bad his sweet nothings were wasted on Andrea. Yuck.
3 of 10 | Posted by jennaboa | Posted on April 13, 2009 6:27 AM
Friendly's Strawberry Fribble - snicker, snort.
I'm tired of the whining and lackluster performances. I had Gio to go all the way, but it seemed like he checked out this week. Between his attitude during the deliveries and his space cadet kitchen performance, it was time to go. The hot pan in the fridge was huge - of course he did not "mean" to hurt anyone, but what did you think would happen?? Still sorry Andrea the wicked witch did not get her walking papers too - but now that she has no one to blame for mistakes and no one to hide behind her lack of skill is obvious. Rosemary skewers? Really? Applebee's calling...
Potty Mouth, you did a bang up job with the junk we had this week. Thanks for the Princess Bride reference at the end (I do not think it means what he thinks it means)- loved it!
4 of 10 | Posted by njgasmifan | Posted on April 13, 2009 9:22 AM
PottyMouth! Thanks for the almost naked ass shot of my bubba Robert (and I do love a nice pair of double-Ds on a fella, LOL!). Great job on this episode, I can always follow the action here, and thank you for calling out Ramsay on his professional use of "fuckface"! That kind of thing is totally appropriate in his "Kitchen Nightmares" scenarios where these idiots have been fucking up for years at a time, but it's not really much of a motivator when you're trying to work with someone...
love, J-Mo :)
5 of 10 | Posted by J-Mo | Posted on April 13, 2009 11:25 AM
Haha, as soon as I saw Robert lying in his bed almost topless I knew it would be a screencap here! Great recap!
6 of 10 | Posted by rubinia | Posted on April 13, 2009 12:09 PM
Dear Pottymouth,
I'm so sad, I really thought Gio was going to win this trainwreck, and I can't believe Andrea is still there. The woman gives me a headache.
Love your recaps : )
Hugs,
Yenta
7 of 10 | Posted by yentapatrol | Posted on April 13, 2009 2:26 PM
Great recap PottyMouth!
I was wondering what was up with the whole shutting down Hell's Kitchen twist at the end of the episode. Seems like the only 2 chefs worthy of the title are Paula and Danny. Maybe the dead weight should just be cut off now and let's fast forward to the season finale.
My heart was broken when I didn't see Andrea's bitchy self get tossed out on her ass at the end of this episode, but with Gio spacing out, I guess it was bound to happen. Maybe next week we'll all get lucky and see a double elimination of Andrea and Ben. What a douche.
8 of 10 | Posted by jaded | Posted on April 13, 2009 2:52 PM
Dear God, why oh why is Fat Bastard still around? REALLY could've done without seeing his nudey folds laying around in bed! Andrea has been up on the chopping block almost every episode; if Gio wasn't such a whiny, lazy pain, it probably would've been here.
9 of 10 | Posted by TheGreatAndPowerfulShaz | Posted on April 14, 2009 7:59 AM
Streaker: I was sad to see Gio go as well, but I really think it may be Paula or Danny who wins this.
Snootchy Bootches: I agree on the blah-ness. Hopefully this week will be a little more exciting.
jennaboa: I love any time we get to see JP. I just wish he had let Andrea GO!
njgasmifan: That hot pan in the fridge was ridiculous. He looked to me like he just got too tired to even care anymore.
J-Mo: You are most welcome! I knew I couldn’t deny you that pic!
rubinia: How could I resist? :)
Yenta: Hopefully Andrea will go tonight. I don’t know if I can stand looking at her for much longer!
jaded: I will keep my fingers crossed that you are right and we are headed for a double elimination.
TheGreatAndPowerfulShaz: He can actually cook better than some of the other people who are still there. I’m still hoping Andrea goes tonight.
Thanks for reading and commenting! I’ll be curious to see how long the “closing” lasts tonight. I’m thinking it won’t go past the fifteen minute mark.
SWAK, PottyMouth
10 of 10 | Posted by PottyMouth | Posted on April 16, 2009 4:32 AM