Previously on Heroes: Mohinder met with Bob the stalker and received his first assignment, played house with his life partners Parkman and Molly, infused the Haitian with his blood and sent him along to Bennet, and pretended to get mind-sweeped. Maya PMS'ed some more and accidentally killed her old family friend Nidia, leaving it up to Alejandro to croon to her while clasping her hands and reversing her terrible mascara tracks. Claire practiced auditioning for the school play, which happens to be a musical tribute of "The Big Lebowski", but was caught by peeping Emotard, Peter didn't get to put his junk in the box and was blackmailed by the Irish Spring gang, Hiro failed to find an AA group for Kensei in feudal Japan, and Bennet is on the search for the rest of the series of 8 Isaac Mendez paintings. Oh, and Mr. Muggles joined the cast of "The Biggest Loser" to regain his doggie pageant physique.
This week, we learn that our heroes just want to get laid, which they work towards under the guise of being kindred spirits. "Oh, you've got powers? Me too! We're made for each other -- now take off your pants!" Bone, bone, bone.
Pub of Broken Dreams, Cork, Ireland
"Tell me what I need to do to to get my life back," says Peter O'Petrelli. Still negotiating with the Irish gang, are you? Are you scared that it's unfair for you to use your powers? Ricky, the gang leader, promises to hand over Peter's identity box if he helps them out with one little favor.
Step 2 - Put your junk in the box.
We all know how one becomes "a couple" and then leads to a life of indentured servitude. This is what the box contains: a huge vial of Prozac, a note saying "You're a Petrelli. Sucks to be you" and a little snippet of wisdom from our favorite poet/recluse Emily Dickinson. "Hope is the thing with feathers / That perches in the soul." Is it worth committing a crime?
The Irish Spring Gang is planning a heist of the cash that's bet on an upcoming football game. "We're talking soccer, eh?" says one of the cronies. "I lost my memory, I'm not an idiot," retorts Peter. All the money placed on bets is put in a lockbox (a Social Security plan of Al Gore's, who claimed he would put interest savings into a lockbox) and transported by an armored car. All Peter has to do is get rid of the guards so that the money never makes it into the car. Easy as pie.
Alright, who farted?
"So if I get you your box, you'll give me mine," clarifies Peter. Someone would've rocked the LSAT's logic problems. "Everyone wins," says Ricky.
"Not everybody," a voice says. "That cash is mine, and I'm gonna kill ya for it." -- but it's one only Peter can hear, because he's picked up Parkman's psychic abilities. It's coming from the goon who looks like a used car salesman, whose name is Will.
"What'd you say?" accuses Peter.
"Not a word," says Slimeball Will.
"You said you'd take the cash."
"Are you accusin' me of something?"
A scuffle breaks out, but Ricky intervenes, and points out that Will has a tattoo that makes them all brothers. Like brothers don't betray each other *cough* Nathan *cough*. Ricky doesn't believe Peter, saying he trusts Will. Peter logically points out that he has no reason to lie (but I guess if he was really crafty, he could set up conflict as a point of diversion so he could run off with the box. Which he could do right now by freezing time or stunning people and then flying away. Lame.) "You don't even know yourself," Ricky says to Peter. I can't handle this display of Emmy-Award-winning dialogue.
Slimeball Will just smirks throughout the exchange. Comeuppance, anyone?
Somewhere in Mexico
The Ying Yang Twins are walking in plainsight during the day (bad idea). Alejandro demonstrates his knowledge of healthy habits as he points out that Maya is dehydrated, exhausted, hungry, and has blisters on her feet. Maya protests that they can't stop, they're close to the border. What they haven't thought about is eating at Taco Bell's new stores in Mexico, which probably take American dollars. Alejandro doesn't know if they'll make it, and decides they need to steal a car. Not an inconspicuous little Honda, but a Cadillac (bad idea).
"Have you ever pooped a balloon?"
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Comments (23)
I might actually hate emotard more than I hate nikki
1 of 23 | Posted by kevintheomanharris | Posted on October 11, 2007 6:30 AM
T.Vo!!! Great recap! Can i just say the D*ick in a box references are hilarious! And why why oh gods of tv is niki back? she is so purposeless.....
Great caption-
"Have you ever pooped a balloon?"
We should have a poll for who hates who more, Niki or Emotard:)
2 of 23 | Posted by lloyd dobbler | Posted on October 11, 2007 7:11 AM
No offense,but that was 98% recap and 2% commentary. I'm not sure about everyone else but I read these things for opinion and perspective, not so I can skip watching the show. Maybe it's the shows fault, but that was a long 8 pages and it wasn't a fun read at all.
Also, may I make a suggestion? Heroes is cut in a dizzying manner with too many stories. Would it be easier to write (and read) if you recap each story separately rather than following the shows chronology?
3 of 23 | Posted by mini.boss | Posted on October 11, 2007 7:21 AM
Loved the recap! You picked up on a lot of things that I missed or hadn't thought of, and any recap with a Logan/Veronica reference (especially an incredibly relevant one) makes me happy. :)
4 of 23 | Posted by kapowski | Posted on October 11, 2007 7:46 AM
I agree with mini.boss. Less recap and more commentary, please.
On another note: I was thinking that Candice/Michelle isn't really dead. Maybe she is just showing Sylar the reality that he wants to see at that moment. And for that matter, perhaps his powers work, she's just wasn't letting his see the mug move...
5 of 23 | Posted by queenlala182 | Posted on October 11, 2007 8:11 AM
I agree with mini.boss. Less recap and more commentary, please.
On another note: I was thinking that Candice/Michelle isn't really dead. Maybe she is just showing Sylar the reality that he wants to see at that moment. And for that matter, perhaps his powers work, she's just wasn't letting his see the mug move...
6 of 23 | Posted by queenlala182 | Posted on October 11, 2007 8:13 AM
Hey all, thanks for the constructive criticism, I never know if those reading actually missed the show or don't watch it, so I will cut down on the slow-as-molasses plot line/dialogue in favor of the more fun stuff. I actually do condense a lot of the storylines to make it easier, but didn't know how much I was supposed to tinker with the show's chronology. I'm no Hiro. :)
Let's start with a survey, as lloyd dobbler suggested: Who do you hate more, Niki or Emotard? Or is there someone who surpasses them?
7 of 23 | Posted by T.Vo | Posted on October 11, 2007 8:55 AM
No doubt... Emotard gets my vote for most hated with all his creepy stalking, recycled power and the fact that his "aliens v. robots" speech still makes me grit my teeth.
8 of 23 | Posted by roadtripper8 | Posted on October 11, 2007 9:50 AM
No doubt... Emotard gets my vote for most hated with all his creepy stalking, recycled power and the fact that his "aliens v. robots" speech still makes me grit my teeth.
9 of 23 | Posted by roadtripper8 | Posted on October 11, 2007 9:58 AM
Emotard gets my vote too. Why if he's "special" too did he make such a stink at school and in class to embarrass Claire and make her admit she was different? Especially since he's already been kidnapped by HRG you'd think that he'd want to be a little bit more low pro.
10 of 23 | Posted by LNNC92 | Posted on October 11, 2007 10:11 AM
First off, "fire at Emo". (Call me sexist, but I'd much rather skinny dip with Niki.)
Like your recap; you catch things I miss (like that it was Claire's car), but, yeah, your own take is more important.
Great screen shots and comments.
Don't like the twins characters much so far.
Find it impossible not to like Hiro.
11 of 23 | Posted by fire@will | Posted on October 11, 2007 10:29 AM
I agree that Candace might be faking it for Sylar. But I have the problems that if she is faking then what would the purpose of revealing her being really fat to him (none) or if she really is dead what kind of tard would put her by herself with a total psycho and not know what was going to happen? Also, if you can make yourself appear however you want would you really be an average attractive redhead? No you'd be Cindy Crawford beautiful or something. The first one was really pretty so I guess this one was a throwaway actress, (hence she's probably really dead) why pay a pretty one?
I didn't catch that being Claire's car either. Thanks!
Maybe this "disease" is a variation on the twins' power. It came from Mohinder's sister and if she was still alive he could wonder-twin with her and it wouldn't have spread. ?
I really don't hate either one. (Nikki or Emotard) Hate that the writing has gotten lamer this season. (Peter not using his powers to get the box AND THEN not opening it when he gets it. LAME) It's only ep. 3 so there's hope that it's just started slow. Still LOVE IT. More greased up Peter makes a better show!!!!!
12 of 23 | Posted by celmo | Posted on October 11, 2007 12:58 PM
I agree that Candace might be faking it for Sylar. But I have the problems that if she is faking then what would the purpose of revealing her being really fat to him (none) or if she really is dead what kind of tard would put her by herself with a total psycho and not know what was going to happen? Also, if you can make yourself appear however you want would you really be an average attractive redhead? No you'd be Cindy Crawford beautiful or something. The first one was really pretty so I guess this one was a throwaway actress, (hence she's probably really dead) why pay a pretty one?
I didn't catch that being Claire's car either. Thanks!
Maybe this "disease" is a variation on the twins' power. It came from Mohinder's sister and if she was still alive he could wonder-twin with her and it wouldn't have spread. ?
I really don't hate either one. (Nikki or Emotard) Hate that the writing has gotten lamer this season. (Peter not using his powers to get the box AND THEN not opening it when he gets it. LAME) It's only ep. 3 so there's hope that it's just started slow. Still LOVE IT. More greased up Peter makes a better show!!!!!
13 of 23 | Posted by celmo | Posted on October 11, 2007 1:01 PM
DL isn't dead. He was a wanted criminal remember. Faking his death is just an easy way to get the bounty off his head. And my guess, Nikki (and DL) are working with the Prof and HRG to take down he company. Then again, that would make her character useful in the plot and therefore impossible.
Heroes early season awards:
Plot no one cares about - Run for the Border (viva Taco Bell)
So hot but so dumb - Claire
Most ridiculous beard - Nathan
Biggest "oh come on" moment - In the hundreds of years of it's existence, no one but Ando ever thought turn the bottom of the sword where "Open" was written (Is there an Ando in the house? No, better not open it then.)
14 of 23 | Posted by MODULUS | Posted on October 11, 2007 1:03 PM
I agree that Candace might be faking it for Sylar. But I have the problems that if she is faking (loss of his powers and her death) then what would the purpose of revealing her being really fat to him (none) or if she really is dead what kind of tard would put her by herself with a total psycho and not know what was going to happen? Don't think she's that stupid not to know what would happen as well. Also, if you can make yourself appear however you want would you really be an "average" looking redhead? No, you'd be Cindy Crawford beautiful. The first one was really pretty so I guess this one was a throwaway actress (hence she's probably really dead), why pay a pretty one?
I didn't catch that being Claire's car either. Thanks!
Maybe this "disease" is a variation on the twins' power. It came from Mohinder's sister and if she was still alive he could wonder-twin with her and it wouldn't have spread. ?
I really don't hate either one. (Nikki or Emotard) Hate that the writing has gotten lamer this season. (Peter not using his powers to get the box AND THEN not opening it when he gets it. LAME) It's only ep. 3 so there's hope that it's just started slow. Still LOVE IT. More greased up Peter makes a better show!!!!!
15 of 23 | Posted by celmo | Posted on October 11, 2007 1:09 PM
I agree that Candace might be faking it for Sylar. But I have the problems that if she is faking (loss of his powers and her death) then what would the purpose of revealing her being really fat to him (none) or if she really is dead what kind of tard would put her by herself with a total psycho and not know what was going to happen? Don't think she's that stupid not to know what would happen as well. Also, if you can make yourself appear however you want would you really be an "average" looking redhead? No, you'd be Cindy Crawford beautiful. The first one was really pretty so I guess this one was a throwaway actress (hence she's probably really dead), why pay a pretty one?
I didn't catch that being Claire's car either. Thanks!
Maybe this "disease" is a variation on the twins' power. It came from Mohinder's sister and if she was still alive he could wonder-twin with her and it wouldn't have spread. ?
I really don't hate either one. (Nikki or Emotard) Hate that the writing has gotten lamer this season. (Peter not using his powers to get the box AND THEN not opening it when he gets it. LAME) It's only ep. 3 so there's hope that it's just started slow. Still LOVE IT. More greased up Peter makes a better show!!!!!
16 of 23 | Posted by celmo | Posted on October 11, 2007 1:12 PM
sorry for the multiple posts! Kept getting an error message.
17 of 23 | Posted by celmo | Posted on October 11, 2007 1:15 PM
Because the two timelines are parallel, the sword wouldn't have been altered until Hiro went back.
18 of 23 | Posted by TvTuner | Posted on October 11, 2007 2:21 PM
Emotard is more annoying.
Celmo: That redhead was way hotter than Cindy Crawford, or the majority of famous women.
19 of 23 | Posted by Merick | Posted on October 11, 2007 3:46 PM
I hate the emotard so much it hurts. He is the worst actor alive, and who did he blow to get on this show?
20 of 23 | Posted by neillfilm | Posted on October 11, 2007 3:58 PM
Emotard is by far more annoying, between his lame teenage philosophy and his total rip off power what gives? What happened to Claire saying "Oh, you fly? so what my dad flies..." I was so waiting for that line. I realize they want to show that some heroes can have the same power, but two in the first couple of episodes just makes it seem like they ran out of ideas.
21 of 23 | Posted by Fitz | Posted on October 12, 2007 7:29 AM
I disagree with mini. I loved this recap. If you want customized recap, write it yourself.
Great job, T.Vo! I'll be back next week.
22 of 23 | Posted by blahblah | Posted on October 19, 2007 5:07 AM
To answer your survey question, I hate Nikki with the power of a thousand yet undiscovered heroes.
Since I've had to watch Nikki for a whole year, Emotard has another year to catch up with my Nikki hate. Plus, flying is a cooler power than being able to switch back and forth between super bitchy/PMSy and whiny/pathetic.
I hope Micah becomes an orphan really soon.
23 of 23 | Posted by blahblah | Posted on October 19, 2007 6:31 AM