Testimonials

Elle and Sylar are renting a car. I don't know why that's so funny to me, but it is. Sylar knows that Claire's with HRG, and because they worked together for like a day, he knows HRG well enough to know just where he's taken Claire. He also knows that HRG is ticklish and that he wears pink socks with care bears on them. Elle says that she's sick of him acting like a boy scout and following orders, so she told the car rental guy that he's a serial killer and he kidnapped her. Sure enough, the Car Rental Guy comes out with a shotgun. Elle starts loudly taunting Sylar about being a wuss, and the Car Rental Guy conveniently doesn't hear any of that, even though he's standing right in front of her. Oy. This show is giving me a headache. He hits Sylar in the head with the butt of the gun and says he's gonna kill him and tell the popo that it was self defense. Sylar's wound heals and clocks start ticking. "I hate Heroes." I don't hate Heroes, but the past few weeks are swaying me to his side.

Suresh is back in the lab, repeating "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and gosh darn it, people like me" into his recorder over and over again. He has a cough. Like most people do when they're bored, he starts toying around with the dead guy's guts. Damn. Clean that guy up already. They're called maggots and they'll make you barf. EW! The goo stuff is seeping from his hands now. And he has something on his face! Oh shit! I'll bet he caused a ruckus when he read that shit in the script.

And...strike.

In the empty house, HRG throws Claire some chopsticks and tells her to catch a fly. She says that's stupid. Then he catches one and she's kind of amazed. She tries, but can't get it. He calls her immature and unfocused and takes her outside and makes her paint a fence. She's all f this I don't do manual labor and he tells her she's a spoiled brat. While she paints and splatters everything around her, she argues that she's trying to use her powers to do good, and he reminds her that she's constantly screwing up and almost got her both of her mothers killed. He pulls out some Turtle Wax and forces her to wax a car, and she starts crying and whining like a shrew. He tells her that if she's gonna be a real hero she needs to stop being such a pussy. He takes her through their lessons of catching the fly and wax on wax off, etc, but she's still graceless. He shows her a picture of Elizabeth Shue and she doesn't even get a little bit red in the face. His training isn't working! As a last resort, he whips out a boom box and tells her it's either train or die. Miraculously, she gets it! She really gets it!

What a maniac!

Tracy calls Papa P to tattle tale on Nathan for going to find the Haitian. Papa says he's gonna cut him into a million pieces and Tracy's like "you're not gonna hurt him, are you?" No, you dumbshit. He's gonna buy him a Playstation and apologize for never being there. Why is every character Ali Larter plays a fucking moron? And why do they all have huge teeth? Papa tells her to use her connections over at Paris Island. At first she thinks he's referring to a celeb STD center in WeHo, but it turns out it's a military training facility he wants to use to train his own army. Mama P walks in and hears her conversation and Tracy tries to brush it off with a giggle and a buck toothed smile. "Washington. I guess there's no rest for the wicked." Mama tells her apparently not. Oh snap!

What's Lipstick Jungle? And why are we getting on the same bus to nowhere as Brooke Shields?

Back at the Brooklyn apartment, Parkman tries to get Ando to explain to Hiro that they need to follow Daphne to Kansas because big dorks like him don't get the chance to bag cute thin hotties but once in a lifetime. Ando, helpful as ever, just makes his goofy ass face, but thankfully Hiro understands the word Kansas somehow and points out that the cornfields are in his comic book. Wow. Who ever wrote that comic book is just as out of ideas as Kring. And off they go!

によるOMGはブルックシールズの！彼女がなぜ泣いているのか？
(OMG it's Brooke Shields! Why is she crying?)

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Posted in Heroes by Flipit at 1:25 PM | Permalink | Comments (5)
Last Comment: juddfan on Dec 3, 2008 04:18 PM.