Sylar and Elle are at a Piggly Wiggly, and Elle's ass is bleeding all over the floor. As Sylar bandages her up, she makes him promise that they'll stick together because HRG is more powerful than them now and he'll beat Sylar on his own. He needs a bloody assed girl who can't walk to save him? I think ya need to bake that cake a little longer, hon. He promises, and a poor extra comes out with a mop, wondering why he didn't go to college like his Papaw hounded him to.
I don't get paid enough for this shit.
Back to the jungle. Big Bad Voodoo Daddy is about to rape the prisoner chick when Mariska Hargitay shows up crying "It's my fauuuult! WAAAAH!" Kidding. Peter knocks him in the head and the girl runs. The Haitian comes in and BBVD, who's shocked that he's bleeding, tells the H that he will have to kill him to stop him. No, that would be smart, and that just doesn't happen on this show. The Haitan gun butts him in the head instead. Wuss!
Hiro is reading all of the comic books about himself in the shop, and he's saddened when he sees what a promising character he was in season one. "WHAT'S HAPPENED TO ME?" Matt comes in. How did he know they was there? WHO CARES? The stoner dude from Clueless tells them all that according to the comic books, there was an eclipse when everyone got their powers, and there's an eclipse now which means that everyone will get their powers back when the eclipse is over. Head slap. COME ON!! We all knew that like an hour and twenty minutes ago. I was really hoping Kring would make some kind of effort to not take the easiest, most obvious route out of this one. Maybe he'll be less of a hack when the eclipse is over. Not crossing my fingers.
Parkman sees in the book that Daphne runs away from the Kansas shack, so he briskly walks back to get her before the eclipse is over. Hiro whines about not wanting to get his powers back cuz he'll have to grow up and it's too fucking depressing. Tell me about it. I paid a Pier One bill today that rendered me broke until 2009. Ah well, at least I have this extremely uncomfortable pleather/wicker chair to write in. Hiro saw some pic of a dead guy, but since the artist sucks I can't tell who it is. Wait I think he has squinty eyes. Ando?
Daniel Dae Kim? George Takei? Carrie Anne Inaba? You tell me.
I would like to point out that Ando did a respectable job of being Ando in this scene.
DaDoink!
In Tiki Room prison, Nathan decides that he'll take this time to confess his sins to the little girl prisoner since she can't understand a damn thing he's saying. I do that with my cleaning lady! Well, not so much confess as complain about men not willing to commit just because I'm chubby and don't have a real job or much ambition. Nathan says that he had power and influence and could have used it to help people and be a real hero but instead he just cheated on his wife and whined about his daddy issues and lived off Natalie Maines throughout the early two thousands. The little girl looks about as fascinated with Nathan as Esmeralda is with me.
Could you just shut the fuck up so I can pick up your dirty underwear off the floor in peace?
The Haitan and Peter come in and save them, but Big Bad Voodoo Daddy is hot on their trail. Because they didn't kill him. Because they are f ing retards. Peter decides to stay behind and fight Voodoo on his own. Nathan's like what? Hell no you'll die and Peter assures him that he can handle it on his own. And Nathan leaves him! Right after his monologue about being a shitty hero he leaves his dimwit incompetent brother to fight a genocidal slave raping maniac by himself. Nice.
Claire wakes up in the hospital looking like hell. She cries about just wanting to be more than a stupid teenager who ruins everyone's life. Well, there's not really much arguing to be done on that one, so her mom just tells her she loves her. The police come in to question her, but Claire's eyes roll back in her head and the machine starts beeping really fast, which means she's about to die. Again.
Argh! Get me a nurse or I won't give your ship back! Argh!
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Comments (1)
My biggest problem with this show is that at the end of every episode, when you ask yourself 'what did we learn about the story?' the answer is usually not much.
In this one we learned that the eclipse can take away their powers, but then they come back, so it barely matters. We learned that Nathan wants to support the plan for a clone army (whoops, I mean specials army), buy we already knew that would happen because we can see the future. We learned that even though Sylar is evil, he's not so bad, no wait, he's evil, no wait...
Anyway, the point is that they just keep going over the same 2 or 3 plots they have actually figured out and beating us over the head with them like we're the semi-retarted Japanese 10 year old.
All that said, my favorite thing about this show is your recaps. And as much as I want the show to get good again, the worse it gets, the funnier the recap.
1 of 1 | Posted by DrJerkass | Posted on December 4, 2008 4:33 AM