While they are waiting for her to complete the tests, he tells her to run an IV of some kind of fake-sounding antibiotic so her kidneys don't fail. She says "Seacrest out," and clicks off the conference. Okay, she doesn't really say that, but that would have been another nice Fox show plug, huh?
"Great psychiatrist...one session and I have shrinkage." That's right House, blame your small shoe size on Dr. Mira. Clearly, you wuv her!
The kids go to Cameron and squeal like stuck pigs about House's plan, mostly because they want to give her a head's up and because they are lazy and don't want to stalk her. Wait until you get to know her, then you'll definitely want to find a way to take her down. They tell her they can either piss off House or her, and she's the lesser of two evils. And of two doctors.
Are you saying you don't like my ex-boyfriend's hair on my head?
"Accommodating House's every whim is not my job anymore." Before it was just your lurid fantasy, Cameron, and you are still 0-1.
"House will get what he wants," Kumar glowers. Nicely done.
"Maybe we should just pay for it ourselves," he says. Way to hold your ground Braveheart. "Tell him she folded." Cameron will have none of that because she doesn't know when to fold 'em. "NO," she says. She'll have to spend tonight coming up with a better plan.
Back to our patient, House tells Dr. Mira, "Your kidney function is declining...sounds like a kidney stone to me."
"The decreased function could be caused by dehydration caused by vomiting caused by the dog that ate the cat that ate the mouse that ate the fly..." Dr. Mira, get off Web MD already. She says the results of the tests are up for interpretation. Maybe she should have a doctor interpret the results - oh, wait. That's what's happening. Although I appreciate her taking charge of her medical condition, she seems unusually argumentative. Again, this is why I'd be playing golf instead of tending to her.
Foreman asks if she noticed any change since starting her IV. She say the pain is about the same, and House notices she does not have an IV in her arm. Easy to do, since she's ON CAMERA. Screw the generators; she can keep warm with her pants on fire, liar, liar!
"We have a limited supply of medication and I am not about to waste it." Okay, I don't think using meds when you are sick is wasting it, although this theory might make more sense if "meds" were "beer" and you stuck on a deserted island. That beer will only stay cold for a few hours, people.
"Last I checked, you had a limited supply of doctors." Checkmate, House. Dr. Mira does the song and dance about one of the crew members getting his - say it with me now - femoral artery cut, and he needs it more than she does. Although clearly in the last transmission, he wasn't hooked up to an IV either, so who the hell really needs the meds?
While she's arguing her point, she begins breathing hard because she's "pissed off." But on further inspection, her wind pipe is cantering to the left, which...gross! Her right lung is collapsing and the windpipe is making a run for the border to the left lung. She needs to open it with a syringe. Fun times.
House yells, "I need you to stab yourself on the right side between the second and third rib, in the mid-clavicual line." Say-what-now-huh? Two things here: One, I would be found dead with a bunch of holes in my chest where I tried to do that and Two, how does everyone in the movies know how to Pulp-Fiction themselves back to life? Honestly, you'd see me puncture myself over and over - poink "Nope," poink "Nope," poink "Oh, dammit...."
Steady....steady...
First try, she slams it into her chest and lung without puncturing any saline, although that would have been hilarious to see Old Faithful erupting from her chest. "See all the good stuff that happens when you listen to me?" House says.
"Means it wasn't a kidney stone," she smarts back. God, she'd be insufferable to be married to.
Intermission....I love this musical montage of House slamming Vicodin down like sweet tarts every chance he gets. Reminds me of how I scarf down Aleve after giving the dogs a bath, just less rehab needed at the end.
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Comments (2)
Great recap, I didn't think we would ever see one for this episode. I really liked the Mira/House dynamic. I would love to see her in another guest spot.
1 of 2 | Posted by Fitz | Posted on February 14, 2008 11:40 AM
I really enjoyed this episode, but not nearly as much as I enjoyed your recap.
Honestly, I was laughing out loud like a mental patient.
Great job! You made my day.
2 of 2 | Posted by treeqtr | Posted on February 14, 2008 8:36 PM