The next morning, Hoopz tells Pumkin about this dude debacle. Pumkin is so shocked, her eyes bulge right out of her head.
Shock! Awe!
Wait a sec, maybe that's just her face. Either way, Hoopz and Pumkin discuss at length, and that's Real's cue to come horn in on their business. I know there's not that many people left in the house, and everyone else hates Real so he can't socialize with anyone, but damn - Hoopz isn't going to marry him if he can't get off her shit for three seconds. Real says he and Hoopz need to talk about this with Whiteboy ASAP, which will be deliciously terrible.
Once the threesome gets settled, Real asks if Whiteboy and Hoopz are boning. This makes him look batshit crazy, by the way. It doesn't make sense to accuse Whiteboy of hating her and fucking her all at the same time, but I know, this is I Love Money so it's not really a common sense parade. Whiteboy denies any relationship, but Real concludes that's a lie. Sadly, Real probably thinks the only reason Hoopz isn't marrying him is because of Whiteboy.
The conversation isn't even interesting drama until Hoopz erupts about her name being in Whiteboy's mouth. He denies all of that too, claiming he's always had her back, and then he and Real have to argue about how "he ain't never stepped to this girl" and so on. None of them trust each other and Real would kindly like some pussy, please!
Aside from this brief yellfest, no one in the house is really speaking to each other, so they all sit in silence while they wait for the vault ceremony. In confessional, Hoopz says she doesn't understand Whiteboy. Why would he talk shit about her when she's Paymaster, right? Of course all of this is probably moot, since he probably didn't talk about her and no one should ever believe Chance, but at least she's pondering a valid question.
Soon CJ hauls them into the vault, where Pumkin's check is immediately put in the box. Then voting commences! Or it should, but the only person who participates is Pumkin. She votes for Megan and everyone else just sits uncomfortably. Luckily for all of us, they decide to have Hoopz come in and pick the nominees. I'd like to say the nominees aren't obvious and it's a great change of pace, but nah, she picks Whiteboy and Megan. Whiteboy is the only person shocked by this because Whiteboy is functionally retarded.
The group splits for the power outing right away. Ah, the perks of a double eviction episode - everything just keeps rolling right along! We barely even have time to mock! The housemates silently board a yacht and then silently enjoy it, at least until they have a little alcohol in them. Then shit gets wild. Megan promises Hoopz that the people who've protected her will continue to do so, and Pumkin thinks that's shady as hell. Pumkin's seeds aren't functioning accurately, I guess. Megan points out that Pumkin sent Chance home, and the two of them fight for like 20 minutes. At least it's a pleasant change from the silence! They pause for three seconds when the captain says they'll be serving lunch in a minute, and then the girls get right back into things. When even lunch can't deter Pumkin, you know this shit's serious.
Hoopz thinks everyone's been very strategic except for her. She concludes she's been playing the game wrong, but um, she's the only one winning anything. That seems to be a good move. A few minutes later it's time for the solo date, except they're on a boat and there's not really anyplace for the other two to go. Whoops! Hoopz picks Whiteboy anyway and tries to flesh out all the dramaramas. She's upset that Whiteboy was mean, but he still maintains he never said anything. He theorizes that maybe Real is just saying this shit because he's desperately in love with Hoopz, to which the world cries, "No! Really?"
Cut to the house where Real's preparing a date, ughhh. Give it up already! It's not cute anymore! He remembers Hoopz once said she'd like to get married in Italy, so he puts a table in the backyard and labels it "Italy." Charming. Okay, this would actually be really sweet if I liked Real at all, but I don't so I will maintain that this sucks.
Venice, exactly as I remembered it.
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Comments (4)
I fucking HATE Real. What makes this poop sac think Hoopz would marry him? He's gross, he's short, his breath probably stinks, and he's imitating Flavor Flav for godsake. Im glad Pumkin is gone, I dont think I could take another week of having to look at that wrinkly butt she calls a face. I hope Megan wins.
1 of 4 | Posted by Poopsicle | Posted on September 28, 2008 2:08 PM
I hate Hoopz. And this is why: "She admits she had to kiss Flav so it doesn't get much worse" Bitch nobody forced u to go on FOL and kiss Flav's ugly ass. You's a greedy attention whoring slut like everyone else there.
2 of 4 | Posted by Niecy | Posted on September 28, 2008 11:43 PM
Anytime I have a favorite on one of these shows, they're guaranteed to get booted very quickly. It's a great power and a curse.
Poor Toastee!
I'll miss her weirdly distorted face and oddly shaped unformed body!
They kept Hoopz in the background at the beginning of the show, but now that they're letting her move into the foreground, I'm succumbing to her charm...
Which means she'll be going home next week....
3 of 4 | Posted by itchy | Posted on September 28, 2008 11:47 PM
"He knocks over a few cups, pukes into the sand, and probably jerks himself off along the way."
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
4 of 4 | Posted by rubinia | Posted on September 30, 2008 6:32 AM