It's all down to Whiteboy now! Megan doesn't think he can pull it off, which probably means he does. It's been 13 weeks, VH1; I'm onto your editing. He seriously races through the challenge so quickly that there's nothing to say about it, other than that he finishes in 16 seconds. Whiteboy's Paymaster! Hopefully that means Real's out! Whiteboy is elated as the challenge comes to a close, yammering on about the money on his mind and how he's peeping everything. That's dirty, he shouldn't talk about his urine in public.
Back at the house, Megan is a sad panda. Real sits down and asks if she thinks she's going home, which she does. He tries to make her feel better by promising that it'll probably be him. It's weird though - they have an actual conversation, like actual normal people. Like nice people! Megan talks in a baby voice for most of it, like Paris Hilton, but feh, you take what you can get.
The Power Dinner is served quickly, and Whiteboy acts like he's the first person that's ever been Paymaster. He runs his mouth about how he's here for one night only, and he just doesn't give a damn, he's going to void someone's check! You know, because we haven't seen that for three months, right? Thanks for the insight.
He's gonna show this glass! He's gonna drink from it!
The three nominees are all very quiet around the table, which Whiteboy can't fathom. Why are they not lauding him with praise on his most excellent existence!
That goes over well.
Seriously, when even Lily Megan is looking at you like you're retarded, shit's gone wrong. It should be noted, Whiteboy is sitting at the head of the table and speaking to everyone like they're his servants. He encourages them to eat, drink, be merry! Have some cake and eat it too. Real remarks that he looks like Tony Montana, which totally went over my head at first. I decided he meant Joe Montana, natch.
They're served food no one enjoys, like broccoli soup, which means we're treated to a montage of people swallowing loudly and trying not to gag. Just what I was hoping for! At least Whiteboy says "broccoli soup" ridiculously. It's like he pronounces every syllable and then some. Remember that old commercial for that terrible Mike Myers and Gwyneth Paltrow movie about the flight attendants, and he spoke about putting the wrong emphasis on the wrong syllable? It's kind of like that, but well, not really warranting an entire paragraph.
Since no one will speak up and everyone's just getting toasted (RIP Toastee), Whiteboy asks Real why he should be kept around. Better yet, he clarifies, who would Real have sent home after the Hoopz altercation? Real insists it wasn't an altercation, but you know that's the quickest way to start a fight - tell someone they're wrong about their drama definition. They get into a big argument, of course. It's dull until Megan totally fucking turns on Real after that nice conversation they had earlier. She is so awful! I totally love her.
She tells Whiteboy that Real didn't think Whiteboy would stay loyal, when in fact that didn't really happen so much. He said he was going home, sure, but not all of those words! Real is understandably pissed, requesting that Megan doesn't lie on him, dawg. I always request that too. Hoopz interjects to save her fiancee's ass, bringing up this one time when Hoopz asked Megan who she'd get rid of if she were Paymaster. Megan said Whiteboy, and she backs that up by being like, "Well, yeah, he was mad at me! He was ignoring me!" That justifies it, duh! Whiteboy is pissed off but suddenly he takes his aggression out on Hoopz, since she should've made this drama known earlier. Yes, that's a totally frigging dumb way to take this argument but we'll go with it! Everyone yells and things have the potential to get interesting, but by this point, Whiteboy is so drunk he can't really speak. He just curses and rambles like Flavor Flav. Cue sad clown music!
My thoughts exactly.
He drunkenly tells Megan to shut up, so they go back and forth over who should shut up and then who should fuck themselves. Sadly, every word Megan says makes it more likely she'll go home. Whiteboy tells her he's Paymaster (OMG, really?!) and then leaves the table, like that settles everything. He's Paymaster, bitches! Master of the Pay! Megan retreats upstairs, too, where Lily Megan consoles her.
Smells like team spirit.
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Comments (4)
Ha! Made it through another wonderful trainwreck of the best of reality tv!
I'm glad Hoopz won, she really does seem like a decent person. Although didn't kiss Flavor Flav? Ew.
But yeah, nice to have a glimpse of Toasted Toastee there. Ah, memories.
Hope you're covering the next VH1 freak show, Bailey. Thanks for the great recaps!
1 of 4 | Posted by itchy | Posted on October 12, 2008 12:15 PM
Laugh out loud at Pumkin getting work done! OHHHH the reunion-waiting with baited breath.
2 of 4 | Posted by oldmomoftoddlerboys | Posted on October 12, 2008 6:49 PM
Thanks for the recaps.
I was glad (as I could be for something like this) that Hoopz won. She seems pretty nice and mature. Whiteboy was dignified in losing, too.
3 of 4 | Posted by fire@will | Posted on October 13, 2008 10:36 AM
"Real remarks that he looks like Tony Montana"
Tony Montana as in Scarface. Al Pacino. "Say hello to my little friend".
4 of 4 | Posted by Peter Pan | Posted on October 13, 2008 11:02 AM