Side note: How long has Toastee been baking, seriously? She got ethnic since we last saw her! Anyway, Megan frigging quits and defeats the whole purpose of the jury. CJ asks why she would do this, and she fakes some excuse about how she's sooo happy with either Hoopz or Whiteboy winning the money. Toastee points out that Megan just doesn't want to hear mean things about her in the jury ceremony, although let's be honest - Megan must hear mean things on a daily basis, right? She basically echoes Toastee's sentiment though, saying no one will decide her fate. So hey, she's done! Screw this show! For some reason I'm taking this personally, like I want to call her and explain that we've been in this so long - how dare she screw up our recaps!
Whatever, though. She quits and the jury is stoked! Now Hoopz and Whiteboy are the final two. They say goodbye to the jury, with Real telling Hoopz to "Kick ass, Nikki." She's the only girl whose real name I've never heard, so hey, I learned something tonight. As Real finally leaves, he says winning Hoopz was a prize worth more than $250,000. Hope no one bursts his bubble by reminding him that he and Hoopz are not engaged.
The next morning, Hoopz points out that she and Whiteboy were the original team captains. Now they're the last ones standing, funny how that works! They're both very sentimental about everyone being gone, especially Whiteboy. He runs through the list of everyone who's left, but it's pretty obvious they spliced in some of the names. Who even remembers Nibblz being in there, anyway?
They get one last T-Mobile Shadow phone call, which is super sad panda. CJ congratulates them on making it so far, but his message really doesn't explain anything about the challenge. That means the contestants have to sit and stew until it's time to go. Fortunately, they're both pretty good at that. We get some footage of them pondering, putting on their socks, etc. Truly fascinating.
They pile into the van and drive to a plaza for their challenge, located where they did the lame eating game. The final round is called The Dash for the Cash. They'll start off in the town square and run to different locations, where they'll have to complete challenges. Ultimately they'll finish back at the house, which seems kind of hilarious. If they had to drive all the way over here, it sounds like the house is far away. Awesome!
The first part of the challenge is begging for money, at which Megan would've excelled. They'll have to collect 100 pesos through any means but stealing, which is super classy! I love that CJ needs to include that as a rule. Also, I feel like this challenge is calling for some serious racism. Soon Whiteboy and Hoopz will be like, "Mexicans are too poor, those assholes won't give anything up!" Love it. After the money is procured, they have to hail a cab and travel to another location. There they'll find the second leg of the cash dash. The first person to finish the game wins the whole shebang!
CJ blows a horn and the contestants take off running. Hoopz immediately starts asking for 100 pesos, not even spare change, which seems wonderfully ballsy. That is, until you do the conversion and find out she's asking for about $8. Feh. Whiteboy asks a little family who doesn't care, but he can speak Spanish so he's got a total advantage. He finally begs a couple for money, but the dude says no. The lady totally calls him out though, asking why he's lying and then calling him an expletive! This dame should have her own show.
Hacienda of Love.
The woman requests a kiss for the money, which means she's totally VH1 material. Upon receipt, Whiteboy takes off for his cab and abandons Hoopz, who still can't come up with uno centavo. (Take that, Spanish teacher who always called me the wrong name. FYI, my real name is the same as a Rock of Love girl's, such are the luxuries of my life.) She gathers some change here or there, but she finally strikes a deal when some guy asks to buy her bellybutton ring. By the way - ew. Seriously, ew. He bargains for it oddly, offering her $100, then $50, and then $20. You can't really offer a new amount once someone accepts the old one, but oh well. Do as the Mexicans do! He strikes a weird pose and then thrusts $100 at her, so okay! Hoopz moves onto the next round!
Groove with me, baby.
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Comments (4)
Ha! Made it through another wonderful trainwreck of the best of reality tv!
I'm glad Hoopz won, she really does seem like a decent person. Although didn't kiss Flavor Flav? Ew.
But yeah, nice to have a glimpse of Toasted Toastee there. Ah, memories.
Hope you're covering the next VH1 freak show, Bailey. Thanks for the great recaps!
1 of 4 | Posted by itchy | Posted on October 12, 2008 12:15 PM
Laugh out loud at Pumkin getting work done! OHHHH the reunion-waiting with baited breath.
2 of 4 | Posted by oldmomoftoddlerboys | Posted on October 12, 2008 6:49 PM
Thanks for the recaps.
I was glad (as I could be for something like this) that Hoopz won. She seems pretty nice and mature. Whiteboy was dignified in losing, too.
3 of 4 | Posted by fire@will | Posted on October 13, 2008 10:36 AM
"Real remarks that he looks like Tony Montana"
Tony Montana as in Scarface. Al Pacino. "Say hello to my little friend".
4 of 4 | Posted by Peter Pan | Posted on October 13, 2008 11:02 AM