We open to CJ joining us in a vault-type environment, which is wonderfully clever. Okay, it's not, but we're almost out of here - might as well play nice for now, right? He explains the premise of this series, since we didn't watch for the past four months. More importantly, he looks like a tool.

Pip pip, cheerio!

We meet the cast again, and surprisingly no one seems too wasted yet. Admittedly we're only two minutes into the show, but considering the people at hand, it's a legitimate feat. Real is wearing a long wig for reasons I can't possibly determine, and Heat's face is cut open, but those things are probably par for the course. I can't imagine how many open sores Heat has in total.

CJ cuts to footage of The Great Alliance Debacle, where The Brokedowns secretly joined up and promptly broke down. That name was fitting after all! Awesomely, he watches the clips and then is like, "Whoa, that's crazy!" like this is all exclusive stuff. Duuude, my mind is blown too! He asks the cast if they were surprised by how insane everything was in Mexico, and I'm pretty sure he doesn't mean that racistly, although I totally invite you to look at it that way. Rodeo responds by cackling wildly. She can't even form words, she's so tickled by this question! To be fair, she also finds the question "What do you want for dinner?" to be off the chain.

Having no luck there, CJ asks 12 Pack how he feels about the series. 12 Pack claims he wasn't looking for love, but those ladies just beat him down. I don't know, am I the only one that finds 12 Pack kind of revolting? Surely there are tons grosser in this cast, but I'm just not feelin' him or the idea of women lining up to sit on his dick. CJ goes out of his way to prove me wrong on that though, presenting Mr. Boston next. And in that light, who wouldn't fuck 12 Pack?

We get a couple clips of Mr. Boston humping random things and prematurely ejaculating.

Coming through!

They could fill an hour of time with Mr. Boston talking about his dick, how he stuffs his favorite bikini, etc. Luckily we only get a minute or two, but all the clips are basically like, "Dude, isn't that guy fucking nuts?" Yes! He climbs onstage following this sad show, and Craig questions why the Mr. Boston charm failed. Maybe because he doesn't have any? Boston blames Megan and Brandi for his downfall, but he also addresses getting beat up in the vault. He wants us all to know he's still covered in bruises, too! It should be noted that the show taped in February and the reunion was filmed in September or October, but he's that much of a pansy.

Boston says it's a tough life when you're not used to dealing with such scumbags, but to be frank, it seems like that's a never-ending situation for him. Everyone else sucks and he's the king! CJ asks Megan how she feels about screwing over Mr. Boston. She feels terrible.

Terribly amused.

Boston says Megan and 12 Pack have both been calling him and crying, which is frigging hilarious just on its own. Of all people to call when you're depressed, you call someone who's mentally retarded? Megan's got Lily for that. CJ ignores this notion as anyone would, moving on to ask why Boston seemed relieved to go home. His answer is that he's got a real job and a fabulous life. That's why he needed to go on I Love Money, y'all! He throws in that he doesn't live in his parents' basement, which is supposed to be a burn on The Entertainer but really just makes me wonder if he lives in his parents' garage instead.

Mr. Boston adds that he wouldn't do another competition-style reality show, since he's too funny to be with all these people. He needs his own show to really contain all his goods! Based on the other contestants' reactions, I'd say they agree.

Skinemax meets Comedy Central.

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Posted in I Love Money by Bailey Quarters at 9:00 AM | Permalink | Comments (8)
Last Comment: shelleyh on Oct 21, 2008 10:48 AM.