Heather hasn't laughed that hard since she saw Bret Michaels' dick. Mr. Boston is undeterred, proposing that his show will be about picking up chicks in different countries. That's not a terrible idea, all things considered. He'd probably have more luck with girls who don't speak English. The audience hoots and hollers for that creation, which means VH1 will pick it up in approximately three days.
Mr. Boston adds that he doesn't want to make a career of reality shows like, ahem, Megan. She waves joyously but Brandi steps in to defend her, natch. Even when someone's just making a casual observation about Megan, Brandi gets super aggressive. They could do a segment about Megan wearing bathing suits and Brandi would be up in there like, "Y'all don't know her life!" Boston counters by saying he doesn't want to be on reality shows with skanks like Brandi anymore. We'll just assume he's looking for new skanks. Leave your applications for that in the comments, maybe we can put in a good word.
Next, it's time to look at The Entertainer's sadsack life! CJ notes that The Entertainer went on a dating show and wound up with a woman hating him, and he went on a show for money but wound up broke. I don't think that's entirely the case, since VH1 paid for him to be in Mexico and they certainly didn't take money from him each week he was there, although I'd watch that show. Anyway, CJ is bad at irony. We get some footage of Pumkin and The Entertainer making out hardcore during their time abroad, which I totally don't even remember! Maybe that was during ChickBomb's watch, before I became intimate with every facet of these clowns' lives.
A refresher - not to be confused with refreshing.
The Entertainer climbs into the hot seat, where he's immediately questioned about the Pumkin hook-up. Maybe he can't remember it either, because he pauses for an awkward stretch before remarking, "Pumkin, you lost a lot of weight! You look terrific." I planned on touching on this later, but since The Entertainer's jumping my gun here, let's go for it: Pumkin looks like a bobblehead doll. She may have been Reality Fat before, but never Real Person Fat. Now she's about 17 pounds total and she's out there in a Hervé Léger knock-off - one of those bandage dresses that's universally unflattering. Even the skinniest girls look six months pregnant in them, but Pumkin still looks rail thin. All I'm sayin' is don't be shocked when she goes into food rehab.
Golf claps all around.
The Entertainer says Pumkin's an attractive woman, but some people might disagree. That's Megan's cue to wave heartily, like her sailor's pulling up to the dock. Love it! The Entertainer goes on to mention that Pumkin's actions are unattractive, which is seriously the pot calling the kettle black. We'll all remember this observation next time he's screaming about wanting to cut someone's throat. They conclude it was mutually the biggest mistake of their lives, so hey! Glad that's settled.
The Entertainer announces that he played this game as honestly and fairly as he could, so he really didn't try to backstab Heather. It should be noted that Heather looks flawless, seriously, but they keep showing her over Megan's shoulder so Megan has room to make nasty faces in all the shots. In other news: Megan rocks. The Entertainer says that if Heather hadn't told him to keep their alliance a secret, he would've sent Megan home on that fateful night. Heather adds that she would've won the next challenge and someone hardcore would've gone home. The next challenge was Ye Olde Stripper Pole, of course, and she could've hung there for two hours! From anyone else, that would be a ballsy claim but from Heather, it's just common sense.
CJ asks 12 Pack why the alliance with The Entertainer and Heather broke down. He cites the Stallionaire alliance as being much stronger, but LOL, remember when Chance got sent home early? Me too! 12 Pack says his alliance struggled because he didn't really know The Entertainer, and our boy Frankie doesn't do what anyone tells him. That's all water under the bridge though - they're best friends now and they have slumber parties all the time! Sadly, those are his exact words; I didn't have to gay anything up at all. 12 Pack tries to redeem it by saying that if they're hooking up with chicks, they just put a sheet up between them. Then I puked.
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Comments (8)
awesome recap! even though i watched every episode religiously, this reunion was kinda boring...
however.. u did mention my absolute favorite line of the entire season
"miss piggy lookin fool"
LOVE IT
1 of 8 | Posted by angelbayyb | Posted on October 19, 2008 11:32 AM
Thanks for the great recaps. It was nice to see a nice person (Hoopz) win the show.
I even think she will be pretty smart about handling the winnings. Too bad it puts her over the $250,000 threshold into "sock-it-to-the-rich" tax territory. I wonder if this means she'll support McCain now? LOL
2 of 8 | Posted by fire@will | Posted on October 19, 2008 1:49 PM
What? It's too much to ask for a little Toastee time? Not even a shot of her standing up?
Sigh. I'll miss my little piece of Toast each week.
By the way, I love the Mr. Boston character, they really ought to give him a show.
And I like how VH1 is turning this group of misfits into their own stable of stars. Wonder if they'll still be using the same batch of losers 10 years from now?
Thanks again for the great recaps Bailey. What's next?
3 of 8 | Posted by itchy | Posted on October 19, 2008 4:20 PM
No that 250,000 income is after taxes such as income, payroll, capital gains have been applied and it's working wages ala salary.
4 of 8 | Posted by User Name | Posted on October 19, 2008 9:01 PM
Nice recap considering what you had to work with!!! As far as Hoopz's mom looking like a Flavor of Love contestant herself, I remember when they had the parents meet Flav on FOL1 and Hoopz's mom was drooling all over Flav...Hoopz herself made the comment that she was afraid her mama was going to try to steal Flav away from her or something to that effect.
5 of 8 | Posted by wintersux | Posted on October 20, 2008 5:02 AM
What have I learned:
The bitch named Megan is still an arrogant, narcissistic piece of shit
6 of 8 | Posted by nerrawllehctim | Posted on October 20, 2008 8:37 AM
megan is probably my favorite thing on tv and has been since beauty and the geek. she knows what she's doing, and she really doesn't seem to care at all about the other people or even the show she is on.
i loved how the entire time pumkin and heather were flipping out, she was sitting calmly laughing. it was beautiful.
7 of 8 | Posted by whitney | Posted on October 20, 2008 12:50 PM
Wow, I totally missed that chick in the audience with money hanging out of her shirt. That's spectacular. Bailey I hope you get to do the Charm School recaps too. The first episode was pretty damn entertaining.
The best part of the reunion was Heather going absolutely mental on Megan and 12 Pack. Overall this show was amazing in its trashiness. Think they could do it again? God I hope so.
8 of 8 | Posted by shelleyh | Posted on October 21, 2008 10:48 AM