He hits almost everything with his mouth, so I reckon he and Brandi could be quite a pair. Whiteboy is awful, and while Real is better, that's not saying much. The Entertainer wins! As always, he's super duper calm. CJ reminds them that someone will be leaving Mexico tomorrow, and The Entertainer hollers, "Not me!" In case anyone had any doubt, right? He's so casual about celebrating things, people tend to miss his victories.

Everyone heads back to the house, hopefully to never speak of the spitting contest again. Whiteboy, Hoopz and Real are worried since The Entertainer wants them gone. Other people he wants gone include: everyone. He makes sure to tell this to the house, but he adds that Megan's the least of his problems, which is a pretty sweet change of pace for her. Finally it doesn't matter that she's a conniving ho - she's a non-threatening conniving ho. He tells the girls he wants Real and Hoopz in the box, and Megan promises to make it happen. This pisses Heather off though. She wants Megan in the box, except...that already happened like ten minutes ago. Awkward. The Entertainer threatens to send Megan home if she's annoying or something like that, I don't know. It's too distracting that he's drinking an entire pitcher of smoothie.

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Nom nom nom?


The Entertainer travels upstairs to chat with Whiteboy. He wants to "call troops with Hoopz," which I don't know what that means but he should probably be talking to her about it instead. Whiteboy calls her a smooth gorilla in response. I know what that means - Whiteboy's a total racist, right? Obviously. While they talk game, Megan lingers in the doorway and just gawks at them. Surprisingly that doesn't inspire them to keep talking strategy in front of her. Turns out they don't like that, who knew? They finally guilt her out of the room, and The Entertainer resumes kissing butt. He swears up and down he'll never do Whiteboy wrong, never ever, and they fist-bump 44 times. It's worth mentioning The Entertainer is fabulously drunk, so he tells Whiteboy to keep bumping until their fists bleed. Whiteboy does it since he's the cream of the intelligence crop, and then The Entertainer drinks the blood. Screw hepatitis, watch out for AIDS, Whitey!

The next morning, Heather and The Entertainer meet outside to chat before the vault. He promises he's sending Megan home. He just wants Hoopz and Real in the box to make them sweat, and then they'll all wind up in a big happy alliance. I'm so sure Heather and Hoopz will be down for that. Most importantly, Heather's Bret tattoo is poking out while they talk, and it just kind of reminds us all why she needs to win - gotta get that shit lasered.

Megan corners The Brokedowns and informs them The Entertainer and Whiteboy are striking a deal. The obvious response to this is to make sure Brandi and Heather wind up in the box, that way Heather can go home. I think they're forgetting The Entertainer is the Paymaster this week, but all right. Their conversation ceases when Heather comes inside and says, "Toaster Oven, what's going on?" and legitimately strokes Toastee's hair. I don't know why, but this is so fucking cute even if it's fake; Heather should win the cash automatically.

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Not as cute: gold teeth.


The houseguests pile into the vault, where Megan's check is immediately placed into the box, sad panda. Real does his usual routine of asking who should go in the beezy, starting off with Hoopz. No one raises their hand, not even Heather! Way to make The Entertainer proud, lady. Everyone votes for Heather, and that makes Real go, "Woooow" ala Flava Flav. Y'all know he wants to bone Hoopz, so I guess he figures that's the way to her heart? It's real sexy. Then everyone votes for Brandi and voila, the vault ceremony is done! It lasted all of 15 seconds so hey, not too bad.

CJ calls The Entertainer in and reveals the nominees. As usual, he is outraged about life. Everyone fucking lied to him and fuck this and fuck that! When he angrily returns to the house, Heather immediately tattles on the other girls and informs him that no one voted for Hoopz. She thinks that will make sure Megan is eliminated, but The Entertainer deduces she didn't vote for Hoopz either. Lo, he is pissed! There's a twist that'll shake up the entire I Love Money household.

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Comments (7)

nashuaf:

"Toastee wears a tiara for the trip because well, of course she does."

I don't normally say anything about recaps but that line was brilliant in its simplicity!

Oh, and Entertainer said he wanted to call a "truce" with Hoopz, not "troops". :-P

tv freak:

charades picture=brilliance

BaileyQuarters:

A TRUCE, that makes much more sense! I was channeling Lily when I wrote that part, apparently.

Thank so much for reading and commenting!!

itchy:

Okay, here's what I don't get: why is the Entertainer the most hated person in the house? Maybe they're not showing us what he really does around there, because I just don't see how he's any more obnoxious or annoying than any of the others. I have to figure he's a real asshole offscreen.

I mean, in terms of what comes at me from the screen, I much prefer him to White Boy's ghetto yiddish godfather or Real's dwarfish blahness. He looks like he could be Midget Mac's son. Kind of cute the way he's panting after Hoopz (or is that Houce? Get it? Truce...houce...oh whatever.)

And while I appreciate Megan's maliciousness, her elongated body (looks like the female version of Plastic Sam) leaves me cold.

I like Toastee though, she's so cutely stupid. Hoopz is more of a non-entity in the show. Brandi C is a treat, I always wondered what those porn girls sound like when their mouths aren't full.

Oh, and another thing, I've never been on the Heather fanwagon, but on this show she just seemed tired. Like without Bret Michaels as a foil, she'd lost her raison d'etre.

wintersux:

Wonder why there was no new show this week? The Olympics are over and the holiday weekend was last weekend.

Reiray:

Great Recap as always! I usually don't post but for this episode I had to because as a massage therapist I have to say the likelyhood of Brandi being licensed in massage is pretty slim to none because few Massage therapists would call themself a "licensed masseuse." Most states have regulations regarding title protection in massage and the term masseuse is a term often used when the person hasn't actually attended any schooling for massage. (Thus she wouldn't be licensed) If she had gone through an accredited school but just hadn't passed her national exams she'd most likely call herself a "Massage Practitioner" or if she had passed all the requirements then she'd just call herself a Massage Therapist or similar title depending on what state she practiced in. I would say that maybe she's just not very bright but that's probably a given to anyone who's watched this show anyhow.

LNNC92:

wintersux

I assume there wasn't a new episode on this week due to the VMA's airing on MTV at the same time...that was my guess.

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