Megan and Brandi strategize over how to get Heather sent home. It's going to take a lot of work at the power outing, but they think they can do it. On that note, that's their cue to go! They report to a beach, and a friendly old dude seduces them all with an American barbecue with American food. They all scream like they just won the grand prize, which is odd. I'm a picky eater so I get the joy of burgers and fries, and I know they're in Mexico, but wouldn't you think craft services is offering that very thing? Chill out, moneylovers!
Everyone half-heartedly plays some beach games. Brandi and Megan are committed to doing anything to stick around, including blowing The Entertainer, so naturally they're out there frolicking. This worries Heather, but she's fully prepared for them to be "the skanks that they are," which is a delightful way to put it. Well said, well said! Everything's coming up roses 'til The Entertainer informs them he'll probably get rid of one of the weaker people this time. I was going to question why he thinks that's the best plan, but he explains, "Sometimes my thinking's just not rational," so...that about sums it up. Thanks, Frank! He ends the conversation by talking about macaroni salad, so they accomplish a lot.
When the solo date comes around, The Entertainer chooses Heather. Shock of all shocks! He banishes the other girls to a blanket, and Heather is like, "Um, wait, what are we supposed to talk about?" He's still furious that Hoopz and Real didn't wind up in the box, didn't even get a vote, and he has to berate her for it. She responds by being like, "Well, I was depressed!"
The Entertainer is impressed.
I guess rationally she could be upset about 12 Pack but it's funnier to think this show is just making her suicidal. Not that I hope she offs herself or anything, I like her! While they argue, Brandi and Megan decide they'll confront The Entertainer as soon as the solo date is over. Brandi believes he should get rid of Heather "if he wants to, like, make good plans with people who will make good plans with him." Oh, well in that case. Now I agree.
As soon as the girls are allowed to rejoin the party, Brandi informs The Entertainer she's a licensed masseuse. Whenever I hear people say that, I always try to gauge how much you'd ever want a massage from them. One of my co-workers does massage therapy, and she is literally the grossest person that could ever come near you. I suppose Brandi would be decent though, even though her tits would be all over your back. For some people that's probably a selling point. She promises to dig her tits into The Entertainer's back as soon as they get home, and Megan offers a foot massage as well. Y'all know The Entertainer loves him some feet, so he's stoked! She should've just offered to let him touch hers; that would've guaranteed her safety.
The girls stay true to their word and start rubbing him down once they get in the door. The Entertainer tells them the massages don't have to be sexual, and they're like, "Uh, ya think?" In confessional, Brandi tells us she doesn't even want to touch The Entertainer with his clothes on, let alone naked. Can't really blame her for that one. She and Megan push the idea of sending Heather home, and his eyes are basically rolling back in his head from sheer pleasure, so he'll do whatever they tell him. It's worth mentioning that the massage lotion is all flaking off his back, so it looks like he's got really crusty dandruff during this whole scene, which is a total bonus.
After they're done, it's time for elimination! The trusty cameraman takes the time to view the most important part of the ceremony.
The strongboobs.
Heather knows she's safe since she and The Entertainer are so tight, whereas Megan is straight-up terrified. Brandi, as usual, is thinking about puppies and kitties and things that smell nice. The Entertainer starts the eviction ceremony by announcing that Megan loves bathing suits, which personally I'm thrilled to find out. I had no idea. Afterwards he starts in on Heather, bitching that she didn't want him to be close to her after 12 Pack bounced. She reminds him of her raging depression, and then she's like, "Wait, when did this even happen?" Mama took a lot of pills to handle that depression, you see.
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Comments (7)
"Toastee wears a tiara for the trip because well, of course she does."
I don't normally say anything about recaps but that line was brilliant in its simplicity!
Oh, and Entertainer said he wanted to call a "truce" with Hoopz, not "troops". :-P
1 of 7 | Posted by nashuaf | Posted on September 7, 2008 4:52 AM
charades picture=brilliance
2 of 7 | Posted by tv freak | Posted on September 7, 2008 10:19 AM
A TRUCE, that makes much more sense! I was channeling Lily when I wrote that part, apparently.
Thank so much for reading and commenting!!
3 of 7 | Posted by BaileyQuarters | Posted on September 7, 2008 5:39 PM
Okay, here's what I don't get: why is the Entertainer the most hated person in the house? Maybe they're not showing us what he really does around there, because I just don't see how he's any more obnoxious or annoying than any of the others. I have to figure he's a real asshole offscreen.
I mean, in terms of what comes at me from the screen, I much prefer him to White Boy's ghetto yiddish godfather or Real's dwarfish blahness. He looks like he could be Midget Mac's son. Kind of cute the way he's panting after Hoopz (or is that Houce? Get it? Truce...houce...oh whatever.)
And while I appreciate Megan's maliciousness, her elongated body (looks like the female version of Plastic Sam) leaves me cold.
I like Toastee though, she's so cutely stupid. Hoopz is more of a non-entity in the show. Brandi C is a treat, I always wondered what those porn girls sound like when their mouths aren't full.
Oh, and another thing, I've never been on the Heather fanwagon, but on this show she just seemed tired. Like without Bret Michaels as a foil, she'd lost her raison d'etre.
4 of 7 | Posted by itchy | Posted on September 7, 2008 11:51 PM
Wonder why there was no new show this week? The Olympics are over and the holiday weekend was last weekend.
5 of 7 | Posted by wintersux | Posted on September 8, 2008 8:16 AM
Great Recap as always! I usually don't post but for this episode I had to because as a massage therapist I have to say the likelyhood of Brandi being licensed in massage is pretty slim to none because few Massage therapists would call themself a "licensed masseuse." Most states have regulations regarding title protection in massage and the term masseuse is a term often used when the person hasn't actually attended any schooling for massage. (Thus she wouldn't be licensed) If she had gone through an accredited school but just hadn't passed her national exams she'd most likely call herself a "Massage Practitioner" or if she had passed all the requirements then she'd just call herself a Massage Therapist or similar title depending on what state she practiced in. I would say that maybe she's just not very bright but that's probably a given to anyone who's watched this show anyhow.
6 of 7 | Posted by Reiray | Posted on September 8, 2008 9:09 AM
wintersux
I assume there wasn't a new episode on this week due to the VMA's airing on MTV at the same time...that was my guess.
7 of 7 | Posted by LNNC92 | Posted on September 8, 2008 12:20 PM