Testimonials

He vents to different guys in the house and mostly just paces around, saying he's experiencing rage. Wow, he's really The Hulk. He walks like two miles before timidly confronting Tailor Made, asking to be accompanied to speak to New York. That's pretty manly right there, but somehow Tailor Made turns down that little proposal. Cheezy drags his feet but heads upstairs to find her, and she's kind of adorably sweet. He tells her he did most of the work, and she replies that since Tailor Made isn't there to defend himself, then she'll go on the date with Cheezy. All jokes aside, I'm genuinely pretty impressed at how nicely she behaved herself. I'm not rooting for Cheezy at all, but aw, the geeky dude wins this round!

Downstairs, Cheezy tells Tailor Made he'll be taking the date, if that's okay and all. Tailor Made immediately agrees and tells him to have a good time, and then he turns around and asks New York why he's not getting the date. He says his strategic vision brought the presentation together, and blah blah, he deserves the date. She says they'll go out tonight, and then she tells the camera that she doesn't care about all this shit. She's just going to pick the guy she wants to fuck. Way to negate all the nice things I just said about you, Tif! They say you can only count on death and taxes, but I guess we can also be sure that New York will be an enormous asshat whenever possible. She chooses Tailor Made for the date, and while I absolutely agree that he's more fuckable than Cheezy, she's a total bitch.

New York and Tailor Made head off for their date, which takes place at a fine jewelry store. If she makes him buy her an engagement ring here, I will just pee all over. The clerk guides them to a table where their dinner is set up, and um, this is all very odd. Who goes to a jewelry store to eat a steak dinner? I love me some jewelry, but I don't know that I'd ever sit down for a meal inside Zales.

Tailor Made confesses that he'd like to spend the rest of his life with her, to which New York says she can't blame him. He must be attracted to how modest she is. After they eat, the clerk brings over a piece New York ordered. I have absolutely no idea what it is, but Tailor Made kisses her on the mouth for it. It looks like some kind of silver crest, but it's the size of a yam and it hangs down past his nipples. If either one of them thinks this looks good, they are mistaken, but he prances around with it proudly. Sad.

Back at the house, Cheezy's still steaming over losing the date. He and Buddha complain that Tailor Made shook Cheezy's hand, and then he went back on their gentlemen's agreement. Everyone decides Cheezy needs to speak up for himself, but for the most part all he seems to do is pace and yap about how he's so pissed. Ugh, nerds are obnoxious.

Tailor Made arrives home from the date and shares that the more he gets to know New York, the more he realizes she's the *** ***. Whatever he says is censored, but I've decided he realized she's the fucking tits. That's just one of my favorite sayings, but also, New York has large breasts. Not sure if you noticed. Cheezy approaches and starts yelling about how Tailor Made backstabbed him. Tailor Made responds by laughing heartily in his face, so I'd say that issue is all cleared up.

A letter is waiting for the gentlemen in the morning, and It reads it with his mouth full of breakfast. Man, he just gets sexier by the minute. The letter says It and Cheezy proved they know how to show New York the money, so now they'll get a sneak peek of her looking her hottest. Basically, they will pay her and she will be their whore. On cue, New York comes downstairs in her best prostitute costume, which is apparently made of holiday wrapping paper.

Ho ho ho!

The date takes place at Pink Kitty Studios, which means they'll be participating in some pornography, I'd imagine. They're actually dressing up for fantasy photo shoots, so it's close enough. New York puts on her outfit, which squishes her breasts so much that they're actually white from all that pressure. Cheezy kind of hangs back in terror, but It is into her biracial boobies. He also grabs her bare ass, all while Cheezy stands back and twiddles his thumbs.

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Posted in I Love New York by Bailey Quarters at 9:00 AM | Permalink | Comments (10)
Last Comment: jennloupus on Nov 1, 2007 10:04 AM.