Testimonials

A crew member gathers everyone in one location to make sure no one gets hurt while they figure out what's happening with the lights. The power comes back pretty quickly, but New York refuses to go upstairs in case it goes out again. She starts to cling to The Entertainer, since you should naturally align with the dude whose knees are knocking together in a time like this, and then the whole house pretty much falls apart. There's the sound of glass breaking and a bunch of things fall from above the mantle, and holy crap, New York runs all the way upstairs and right out the front door. Girl doesn't play around with this stuff! She doesn't even have shoes on her feet and she's out the freaking door.

Punk follows her out, trailed by Tailor Made, of course. A few others tag along in time to listen to New York scream about how there's evil in the house and she shan't enter it again. She's sort of channeling the God Warrior from Trading Spouses. She thinks Lori, who was previously her trusted spiritual advisor, put some kind of curse on the house. Certainly that would be the best way to use her powers. Punk says there's some spirits chasing them up in there, all because New York and Tailor Made were touching. Finally we have proof he lied on his blood oath! Honestly, this whole segment is one of those things where you're like - wait, really? This isn't some kind of bad Saturday Night Live sketch?

New York tells Tailor Made this is why you shouldn't play with the spiritual world. Now the spirits have taken over the whole house, and she surely can't sleep in that environment. She leaves for a five-star hotel (of course) and tells the guys to fend for themselves, which is very gracious of her. You'd think Tailor Made would happily sleep in the yard now, but he actually passes out on the couch. Meanwhile, Punk makes a phone call and tells a friend the haps. That includes referring to Tailor Made as Prince, as in the Prince of Darkness. I like Punk, but dude, that's kinda sad.

The Entertainer starts to hear voices inside the house, and while he's eating some sort of rice bowl in his bedroom, he hears a door slam. Fabulously, Midget Mac is in the kitchen making eggs and he's just like, "Oh, someone's running." It doesn't alarm him that the full-sized men are frightened. His Midgetzu will get him through! The Entertainer insists he's not scared, but when he goes into the gym and discovers it's been destroyed, he screams like a woman. Punk darts in to check on things, and then he and The Entertainer scamper out in terror. In fact, The Entertainer is so freaked out he puts on It's helmet from the presentation a few weeks ago. Sure, the spirits could destroy the entire house, but by God his head will be safe! To It's credit, he calls The Entertainer "Sergeant Asshole," and that sort of makes me want to jig around.

G.I. Joe, reporting for duty!

The next day, everyone is still alive, fortunately or unfortunately depending on how you view things. Punk says he's heard stories about that crazy spiritual shit, but he couldn't believe it until he actually saw it. Now he's experienced it firsthand, but it's not time to dwell on that. Today's his date, so it's time to pump some iron and prepare, rah!

The butler delivers a note to Punk. New York says yesterday the men showed her they were willing to make some huge sacrifices for her love (gag), so as a reward, today they'll get a poolside fiesta. Arriba! Since Punk's sacrifice impressed her the most, he gets to meet New York downstairs for a very special date. He says all he needs is this one date, and aw, that probably means it's going to backfire spectacularly. Every guy says that kind of thing, and then New York goes psychotic on him. Admittedly that's not much of a stretch for her.

New York takes him to a spa, which hopefully won't have the same mud bath that offended her so much last week. The date starts with her talking for like 20 minutes about how he's beautiful - like really, he's gorgeous. Did you know he's handsome? Quite sexy, that one. Sadly, she worries that he might be too good to be true. She asks why he came all the way across the country to see about her. That's sort of cute, but you know what's not cute? Her luftballons.

Girlfriend, no.

« Beauty and the Geek: Los Besos Y Las Danzas | Main | The Amazing Race: Off We Go! »

Posted in I Love New York by Bailey Quarters at 7:22 AM | Permalink | Comments (16)
Last Comment: blahblah on Nov 20, 2007 05:46 PM.