From the recap: I also love that it was probably early in LA when they shot this scene, so I hope his mom was in New York or something and reacted like, "What the fuck you callin' so early for?" *****

Don't the timezones work the other way around? :P

Great recap.. much better than the boringass ep. this week. I can't say that I like Buddha AT ALL though. I want to whipe the smug off his face.

I loved this episode! NY really outdid herself, from puking in a bucket rather than just swallowing one bite (are you really telling me NY can swallow Flava Flav yet pukes after tasting a salmon salad??), to straight up oogling over future sex with Buddha, to the "glad I wore panties" line, and finally to her enormously large tatters (although tatters might not work since her boobs seem incapable of movement - miss you Flasher :)

But this recap was equally awesome (I promise this is a compliment) as every single line from the show that made me laugh out loud you mentioned, especially the "appalled - that don't mean something good - do it?" that I just flat-out lost my shit over that!

(also loved tailormade for worrying how he would encorporate ranch dressing in his SALAD dish - you dumb motherFer!)

Oh! One more thing - this is what makes my shitty ass day at work bearable: "God only knows what wonders are hidden underneath her clothes, but there's like a 65% chance there's not a penis."

THANK YOU!

Haha wow, shia, I am dumb as rocks! Pretend that whole time zone paragraph isn't in there. Clearly I should never make fun of It or Wolf when I can't even tell time. Thank you for liking the recap despite that!

Carmelicious, so glad you enjoyed it!! I'm also completely delighted that you used the word tatters. Your comment made my day!

Enjoyed your recap even more than the show!

The next episode - with the ex's - looks like a good one!

Loved the recap! Also, in the previews did it look like Pretty yelled at NY to go buy a weave or something like that or was it just me?

just an FYI: La Perla has AMAZING lingerie, which is obviously expensive. I spend much time perusing, but never buying, in the Michigan Ave store

So, do you suppose expensive lingerie looks cheap on TV... or just cheap on New York?

Oh, one more thing -
I cannot believe New York is 25!! She looks like she is pushing 40!

I gotta say it looks cheap on New York! I think it's the enormous tattooed boobs, and I know I mention them a lot but seriously, they're about to shoot through the screen at us. I'm glad to hear Tailor Made didn't get ripped off though! If he had, you know New York would've found out and ripped him a new one. On second thought, maybe that would've been better.

"I also love that it was probably early in LA when they shot this scene, so I hope his mom was in New York or something and reacted like, "What the fuck you callin' so early for?" "

Great recaps! Only one problem for ya....if it was early in LA, won't it be later in NY? So his mom would already be up, right? :)

erm...and how I missed that shia0bundan already said that....sorry! :)

BaileyQuarters, anything would look cheap on our girl New York, dontcha think? I love her, but wow, what a hot mess. And you're totally right -- she is working the worst case of boob bulge I've ever seen. Love the recap, as always. I'm going to miss Wolf. "He sniffs a ball of mozzarella cheese and asks if it's meat." You don't find that kind of man every day.

And Lalia -- I live right by that store and walk by it at least once/day. I love how so many suburbanites and tourists stop and gawk at the whorish mannequins in the window, all scandalized. Cracks my shit up.

Yay, you're back!!

Oh, where do I begin??

Here: "In his interview, Wolf says if he goes home tonight, he'll be appalled. Then he adds onto that by saying, "Is that a bad word? Like, it don't mean something good, do it?" God, please do a double eviction."

This literally made me LOL. Why is it taking New York so long to narrow down 25 suitors when the Bachelor got through his 25 women in less than 2 months? Oh, vh1.

Fun fact:
Remember when we found out Mr. Boston was "dating" Pumkin? Yeah..that should get him a forever ban from any of New York's shows. I'm smelling fakery.

"And..I'mgonapoovit"
It's official: I Love New York has the best reality TV editors ever! Bailey, you're screencap is priceless.

New York is suffering from a serious case of UniBoob and it deserves to be mentioned in EVERY RECAP...IN EVERY PARAGRAPH.

Sister Patterson is getting increasingly bitter. Didn't she get some goodness from one of New York's castoffs awhile back? That should've put a smile on ol' girl's face for at least ONE episode.

What's the over/under on how long it will take for New York and Buddha to get better acquainted, if you know what I mean (chicka chicka bow wow)?

Alright, so I'm not too up to date on my New York bio so I have a couple questions maybe some of you can answer?

* What exactly does that tit tattoo say?

* Is Sister Patterson still married?

BTW, this show is too easy to recap; it just makes fun of itself. Wait...or does that mean it would make it harder?

I think the tit tatto says Princess. I might be wrong.

And Sis. Patterson and NY's dad were never married. Odd for such a "Christian" woman.

After she got the boob job she shoulda bought NEW tops that fit the new boobs in 'em.

Amen, Dawn. It's more than a little disturbing to see New York's booblastics smushed into those tiny tops. I like how she wears bras with demure clear straps, yet the actual bra is always showing. Classy.

I was just watching a rerun and I was reminded of how many times I've seen those clear bra straps. IMO they are far skankier than the actual colored bra straps. Those things aren't fooling anybody. Besides, I thought that breast implants make it so your breasts sit like apples (basketballs in this case) on your chest, why would she even need to wear a bra? And a push up bra no less.

OK, I know that men like big tatters but I am thinking the other Rock of Love term "clown tits" applies here. What drives me nuts is when one boob fits into the outfit just fine but the other boob looks like it's practically being cut in half by the top seam of whatever corset-type thingy she is wearing. I mean, good lord, doesn't that hurt? Well, maybe not since vital nerves are often cut during the augmentation.