I'm back! The demons at Best Buy have been defeated and my computer is fixed. We're on Day 18 of the celebrities supposedly being in the jungle. I've missed Lou, Janice and Sanjaya. But I've missed the summer's sexiest couple most of all.
The episode starts with a recap of the previous episode's highlights. Shocking. The celebrities are stressed because they do not know where they stand in the voting. The hosts told them that Patti's not in the bottom two and informed Janice that she's not in the top two. Stephen Baldwin thought that Patti woud be in the bottom two and finds it unsettling that she's still there. Patti is actually the smartest pseudo-celebrity there. She modeled herself after a beloved cultural icon in order to convince America that she's non-threatening.
The hosts announce that the celebrities will be playing individually instead of in male and female teams. Some of the cast members are happy.
Some aren't so excited.
Lou immediately rips off his shirt to ease Sanjaya's fears.
The celebrities all get new green shirts to go with their new solo status. Hooray! Janice is even bitchier than usual because she's mad that she's not in the top two. She starts bossing Holly around and telling her to do the dishes. Holly decides to have a one on one with Janice and tells her that she hurt her feelings by being so bossy. Janice apologizes to Holly in person but during her interview she mocks Holly and indicates that she's a big baby. I thought her apology was a turning point but after all of that Janice officially has no redeeming qualities.
John announces that the next challenge will involve mud wrestling. Torrie, a former pro wrestler, believes that she will win this and I hope she does because she deserves to win at least one challenge. She's so confident that she takes time to dress up her comptition.
Stephen Balwin was too busy taking a dump and missed out on picking out a wrestling costume. He fashioned his own out of spandex shorts and a cape and it instantly transforms him. Unfortunately he is transformed into an annoying person who adopts an obnoxious accent and is dressed hideously. Hmmmm, he's starting to remind me of someone....
It turns out that the cast won't have to wrestle; the challenge is to find 1 out of 3 stars in the muddy water while being molested by a crocodile. Whoever wins will get pizza. Th cast jumps into the water and Janice, of course, is the first one to quit. Sanjaya finds the first star, Patti gets the second and Lou finds the third.
Before the winners get to eat their pizza, the hosts do the first elimintaion. Sanjaya is up first and he's safe. Next is Torrie, she's safe. The next person called is Holly and she's-going home. Janice exclaims that she thought she would be going home and makes a big production of how upset she is over Holly's departure. This is the same woman who just mocked Holly after apologizing to her face to face. The hosts leave for a break and they will announce the next person going home once they return. Meanwhile, we are treated to a montage of each celebrities charity.
I'm raising money for my commissary. I don't wanna be Bertha's bitch.
Charity? I thought this was the audition for Lost Boys III: The Other Corey's Revenge
And now it's time for the hosts to make the sad/serious face.
« So You Think You Can Dance: Another Two Bite The Dust | Main | Top Chef Masters: Return Of The Amused Douche »
Comments (7)
Janice did drop the most celebrity names. I don't agree with the count. Celebrities you meet while on your knees shouldn't count.
1 of 7 | Posted by Snortles | Posted on June 23, 2009 7:14 AM
Patti comes across as very nice. I think she's the one to beat.
Janice is the type of person I try to avoid in real life.
I never thought Sanjaya was gay before this show. Now, I think he needs to come out of the closet.
2 of 7 | Posted by Mr Dangerous | Posted on June 23, 2009 7:52 AM
Do some research, Mr. DAngerous, and you'll find Patty is anything BUT nice. She's as much of a criminal and a liar as her husband.
3 of 7 | Posted by cattyfan | Posted on June 23, 2009 2:27 PM
Well, if she's a liar and a criminal I'm sure she'll be convicted of some liar/criminal crime.
As I said before, she comes off very nice and I would put my money on her for the win. (Her or Lou.)
4 of 7 | Posted by Mr. Dangerous | Posted on June 23, 2009 2:54 PM
I am absolutely overjoyed that the contestants vetoed Janice returning to the show unanimously.
On a sad note the remaining contestants got Colgate Wisp toothbrushes. I wonder what that product placements cost?
Arrrgh. Oh well as long as Janice is long gone and on her way to her next collagen injection for the lips I am happy.
5 of 7 | Posted by Snortles | Posted on June 23, 2009 5:09 PM
The reason Peppermint Patti is on the show is to make it possible for her husband's defense team to claim that it is impossible to get an impartial jury, therefore forcing a mistrial.
She's as much of a slimebag as he is, milking his position for a high-paying job.
Although Illinois politics wouldn't exist without nepotism, so it's not like there should be any surprises.
6 of 7 | Posted by itchy | Posted on June 24, 2009 12:06 AM
Well, even though I CAN'T STAND raw veggies, I DO LOVE your recaps/captions :) My personal fave of the week is: "Charity? I thought this was the audition for Lost Boys III: The Other Corey's Revenge"--f'in HILARIOUS! Speaking of the "other Corey," he would be an awesome contestant if they have a season 3, especially once he starts going into withdrawals, and starts freaking out and talking to trees...
I too, will miss Janice. She is definitely revolting, and can be really annoying, but she is almost as "entertaining" as Heidi & Spencer, the 3 of whom, along with that "style expert" who has whored herself out to everything from Lee Jeans to Dr Scholl's, I would LOVE to trap inside one of those mirror-like/alternate dimension things from "Superman II" and send it spinning into outer space, once they have ceased to "amuse" me and the rest of the population :P
7 of 7 | Posted by jerzgrrrl72 | Posted on June 24, 2009 12:58 AM