Seven till Midnight pick models for their sexy Lingerie shoot, they want plus sized models, too, though, and Nathan brings in some despite an unwilling Janice. Xian harps about her weight and at the next shoot, gets excluded from the casting, a high-end underwear butt-enhancement designer's shoot. Nadia, Dominic and Christian get this one, and Nadia decides that she wants to earn some extra dough and take her top off for the shoot. Meanwhile, the plus sizers move in and Chandler starts a fight with Elana, one of the new plus-sizers.
And Janis goes off on a lot of stuff.
Wow, so I wrote this latest recap of the fabulous Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency recap up and erased it. Awesomeness! Even better on top of my lateness, right? I have a good excuse for that, though: I had my birthday this week. Wohoo!
Celebrating the ol' 2-5 in style.
In Any case, this week Seven till Midnight comes to Casa J Dogg to find some models for what I can only figure is a costume clothier for porn stars.
Overtly sexy poly-blends, anyone?
Seven till midnight comes into the model crazyhouse, and the owner, May Leung, looks like a cross between Mr. Miyagi and Skeletor.
We're here to cast sexy Plumber-ninja and sexy domestic violence-ninja. Which one do you like, Ralph?
Mr. Miyagi gives Janice a gift (Janice eats clients who don't give her gifts) of a sexy policewoman outfit. Really? Don't you think there are better suited costumes for someone...um...of Janice's class and ilk? Like, how about sexy cryptkeeper? Sexy slim jim? How about you just wrap Janice up in a bedsheet and call her a botox burrito? Or, a Botoxito? And you thought I didn't know Spanish! Shame on you!
The vice president of seven till midnight labels Janice as someone who "represents our clients." Really? You design sexy costumes for Zombie armies with bipolar disorder? Interesting.
Bwaagh! We demand brains and moderately-priced sexy costume wear!
Mr. Miyagi informs Janice that she wants guys who look "soccer mom sexy." I'm going to assume that means overweight, with high-waisted pants and a perchance for ugly, bobbed haircuts. Janice chances into her sexy cop costume behind her chair (oh, does the class ever end??)
Thank god for chairs.
Janice's puddin' faced son Nathan is aptly appalled by his mother's failure to act like a regular human being, and he just puffs his chest in a corner. Nathan, it's okay. Sit in your tire swing. Go to your happy place!
The guys come in and Mr. Miyagi gives Dominick, J.P., Payton and J.P. a go at looking like a soccer mom fantasy. Gross. Don't these endeavors usually end in lawsuits? But this isn't the real world, it's Janice-opolooza. The girls come in and have to give a "come hither" look, by physically waggling their fingers at the casting people. Wow, we're going really literal, huh? Well, if you really wanna go there, why don't you just take off your tops and call it a night? Then I can at least get an early lunch. Yum, lunch.
J.P. in a move that stuns the reality tv universe, takes Janice aside and tells her that he doesn't wanna do the shoot, that he feels uncomfortable. This makes him more likeable, but what comes next is laughable: he's like "I'm kind of a gay role model now. " WHAT? Since when? Since you're on a reality show on lifetime and are trying to make money as a MODEL? Come on, you're just doing what you DO. And, nobody cares who you are, I promise...there are enough gay role models in hollywood that I think you'll slip under the radar, J.P. geez.
So the remaining guys who still consider themselves working models give cheesy lines in their slutty costumes. Mr. Miyagi and Co. like Xian and Traci and the two fatties have to do a little sexy roleplay with Dominic. of course, Xian pretends Dominic is a pork chop while Traci, the most unsexy human being alive, is appalled.
Boys? GROSS!
Of course, seven till midnight opts for Xian and Selena and then they wanna see some more fatties. I mean, by fatties, they mean bigger than Xian. They mean FATTIES.
Plus Sized?!!!! Sexy Costume Co, be prepared to be killed with my ocular laser beams.
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Comments (4)
I could not believe Janice's reaction to the fatties, I mean plus size girls. I mean really, does she think fat is contagious? I wish/hope that one of the big girls slaps the crap out of her next episode. And what is up with her son's voice? Its creepy. Loved the recap!
1 of 4 | Posted by Cherie | Posted on October 14, 2008 6:08 PM
Oh yeah Happy Birthday lol.
2 of 4 | Posted by Cherie | Posted on October 14, 2008 6:10 PM
more and more this show just seems so set up . . . I doubt Lips was unaware that she needed plus sizes, I think they also needed house drama, and they sure got some of that . . .
I couldn't really focus on it at all, I so didn't care, and Xion . . . I'm with Lips on her, if you want to be a model, lose the weight, or at least be a fit model like Elle or something . . . . she's soooooo lazy . . . and frankly, all they have to do is sit around the house till they get called on a job, so hard, I could never find time to work out . . .
Thanks for the great recap tho, Mona, and I'm kind of glad the show's ending, but I will miss our special time together, so for that I'm sad . . . ."sniff"
Loved the hideous fish grab too, imagine kissing that . . .
3 of 4 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on October 15, 2008 4:54 PM
Glad you enjoyed my recaps, folks! I'm moving onto a new show, soon, but I'm all about making fun of the fatties (well, not really. Mostly just Xian). Yeah- it's totally staged.
Fish grad courtesy of Flipit!
4 of 4 | Posted by Monamonzano | Posted on October 16, 2008 3:35 AM