Two months later, Jake and Eric arrive in Rogue River, which has been deserted. (Also, Rogue River? Why not just name it Sketchytown?) However, the town clock says 9:02, which is when the EMP was detonated, thus turning this scene into an actual demonstration of continuity! You’re learning, Jericho! Jake deciphers some cryptic markings painted on the houses of the neighborhood, explaining that FEMA came by on October 25, and that they found some righteous corpses within. Jake drives up to the hospital and parks in the deliveries area, which is just stupid because the white zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers only. Everyone knows that. Eric finds a flier from FEMA and reads it out load, saying that the water is contaminated. Then they are both shot at, which earns a slow clap from me because these two just won’t shut up. They both run into the hospital, which is presumably where the shots are coming from, and, come to find out, littered with corpses. Smart. Eric finds some bullet casings, and Sherlock Jake is able to deduce that they came from a group of mercenaries called Ravenwood. Gee, are they from LOTHLORIEN?
Back at the Hawkins Household of Awkward Accusations, Gray is now in the kitchen, bothering even more members of the family. Come on Gray, grow a pair. Pop out their eyeballs! Electrocute them with a floor lamp! (I can’t help but think that if Jack Bauer were around, all of Jericho’s problems would be solved in roughly 15 minutes. The people would be fed, there would be gas and electricity, and all the bad guys would be dead or at least bleeding from every orifice.) Hawkins explains that they’re lucky they had gas for the stove. Okay, Hawkins. So the whole town can get by without working cars but goddammit if you can’t have your precious bundt cakes. Allison mouths off to Gray and storms off, but Hawkins grabs her and asks her to do something for him. She sneaks into his secret lair and cracks a glow stick. Allison, this is no time for a rave. Back at the House That Crazy Built, Heather has set up a ton of bowls of water around the kitchen table and has commenced her little science experiment. She is also wearing goggles and a cape and is cackling loudly towards the heavens.
Hey baking-soda-and-vinegar volcano, SUCK IT.
At the abandoned hospital, someone throws a grenade at our boys and Eric screams like a little girl. I’m starting to like this enemy. That’s all from the hospital for now. Allison quizzes her brother on the fake story of their life, but he is hungry. Gray comes in and tries to talk to him, but he is HUNGRY. Well, pack it up men, no story here. The boy is hungry. The word hungry is then bandied about five or six more times, and then the scene ends. Really. Perhaps this is a cry for help from the writers, locked away in the CBS dungeons with no food or plot outlines.
WAAAAAALLLLLLLTTT!!!!
Damn, Jake and Eric are fine. It wasn’t a grenade, it was a flashbang, Jake explains. (Although I thought he said flashback, and concluded that your standard Lost plot device would also make a pretty good weapon). It was just loud and bright to scare them, not kill them. Whatever, it wasn’t lethal, so it’s dead to me. Someone calls out to them, and they cautiously make their way up the stairs to find a handsome young man pointing a gun at them. Charming!
Mayor McCheese calls out for the special sauce to his grilled patty, but only gets April, the gross dark meat McNugget. She assures him that there’s nothing she can do. Thanks, CHIRPY OFFICER OF DEATH. She also confesses that she’s pregnant, and then launches into some sort of monologue that’s supposed to be touching but, like her, just ends up being annoying. The mayor tries to pull his own plug but oh no! Mama heard the whole thing! The two redheads embrace, and I vomit neatly into a nearby ficus plant.
WE ALL DIE ALONE AND AFRAID.
« Recap: Jericho: Finalist Submission I | Main | Daily Digest: November 15, 2006 »
Comments (12)
It was really, really hard to decide, but I vote for this one.
1 of 12 | Posted by Strock9
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Posted on November 15, 2006 6:07 PM
I have to recommend dropping the McD's jokes and adding more paragraph breaks, but I vote for this one!
2 of 12 | Posted by Strock9
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Posted on November 15, 2006 6:09 PM
whoops
3 of 12 | Posted by Strock9
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Posted on November 15, 2006 6:14 PM
Hey, this was yet another awesome recap. I'm definately voting for you. And BTW, I like Mayor McCheese, Strock9! lol
4 of 12 | Posted by Vixen
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Posted on November 15, 2006 8:11 PM
Mayor McCheese - nice!! Close call but I go for this one.
5 of 12 | Posted by CrazyTrain
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Posted on November 16, 2006 11:39 AM
Mayor McCheese - nice!! Close call but I go for this one.
oh sorry if this is a double but PLEASE paragraph break when you switch scenes :)
6 of 12 | Posted by CrazyTrain
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Posted on November 16, 2006 11:40 AM
I agree about the paragraph break. It just needs set up a little better. That said, I pick this entry.
7 of 12 | Posted by may1
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Posted on November 16, 2006 1:18 PM
Hello, fellow Jericho fans/victims!
I'm with you guys on the paragraph breaks. I separated them more in the first recap, I guess I wanted to tighten things up in this one. But I agree it doesn't flow as well, and it will be better next time, if there is a next time.
Also, thank you for voting! You are all now invited over for Thanksgiving, wherein you will witness such colorful spectacles as a massive gravy spillage, acute bitterness over the outcome of the wishbone snapping, and Grandpa falling asleep into several pieces of pie.
8 of 12 | Posted by Screamapillar
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Posted on November 16, 2006 3:15 PM
haha, really nice recap...they're both very funny, but this one definitely gets my vote. the picture captions are great, and the writing is really quality.
9 of 12 | Posted by thetank
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Posted on November 16, 2006 8:25 PM
haha, really nice recap...they're both very funny, but this one definitely gets my vote. the picture captions are great, and the writing is really quality.
10 of 12 | Posted by thetank
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Posted on November 16, 2006 8:26 PM
also, little gems like the one about walmart-- "bomb or no bomb, the good people of Kansas will not go without their fantastic savings" -- had me rolling
11 of 12 | Posted by thetank
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Posted on November 16, 2006 8:28 PM
Jerico is a terrible show, but this recap made it enjoyable. Mayor McCheese gets my vote.
12 of 12 | Posted by FurtiveSpy
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Posted on November 18, 2006 8:24 AM