Bing-bong at the Jenner household. The guest chef shows up in his tuxedo, and he looks like he's about 16. And Bruce is saying some very vulgar things about porking his wife. Ok, maybe not, but Bruce makes it pretty obvious he's trying to get Kris Jenner's panties off. He also talks about setting the mood, which we can all take pleasure in. Why? Because we know Cici is going to ruin it all unknowingly, and Bruce has no idea! Hijinks!
No way I can fail.
The girls all go to Cafe Du Monde, and they're enjoying some beignets of course. Khloe starts rambling about Reggie's party, and she really isn't saying anything at all, just making noise and no points. But I understand why, because suddenly, and this is all organic, a "fan" comes up and asks for a picture with them. Just one fan. Khloe was obviously waiting for this chick to come in, and Khloe's rambling was her cue. Anyways, this "fan" is actually from New Orleans, and her mother is there with her. Of course, because locals always frequent the tourist attractions. The mom comes up and these two are asked to be the "tour guide" for the girls. This is all so natural, it's amazing.
Random poor people fans and possible stalkers? We're all yours!
The girls and Rob all go driving with the "fan" (Marisa) in tow, and Kourtney is driving because they don't trust the local trash with their luxury SUV rental. They drive to the 9th Ward and see all the destruction. You guys, this is like such a surreal moment for the girls who know exactly what it's like to get caught in a hurricane. A hurricane of undeserved fame. They decide to go in one of the houses (and Marisa's mom, Lisa, randomly shows up).
Lisa talks about what happened to her house, and then they all drive back to see the FEMA trailer they now live in, and their condemned house that it's right next to. I know we'd all like to believe the girls would gain some humility or something out of this, but I'm totally calling bullshit. I mean, maybe they'll feel bad for the rest of the day, but then they'll forget about it.
Well, after seeing the trailer and how small it is and everything, Kourtney gains some humanity. She asks the girls and Rob outside and says they should help the family get furniture. Yeah, jam some more furniture in that tiny little trailer you were just saying was too small. Also, the girls don't want to give TOO much, so Kim is going through Reggie's charities and seeing what she can get.
So she's on the phone, and she sounds really surprised and what one place is going to offer her. And when I say really surprised, I mean she sounds like she already knows what they're going to say before the actual phone call takes place. If she's even talking to anyone on the phone. Back inside, Khloe says there's one more place they want to go, and they round up the entire family.
You guys should totally get a Playstation.
Poor Bruce. Cici and Kris come home and he's got everything clean, looking for some lovin, and this is what he gets. A houseguest. The three eat dinner and drink champagne, all while the chef stands in the background. In his tux. This doesn't look odd to you Kris? Also, Bruce is being left out of the conversation. Not that he really wants to be in it, because they're talking about shopping and designers and shit. But a topic of conversation that he had some input and didn't put him to sleep isn't too much to ask. So Bruce excuses himself to bed. Looks like it's Lubriderm for one tonight. sad trombone
Back in Nawlins, Kourtney pulls up to the final stop on the tour of the town, and it's a furniture store! Lisa gets out and tries to act as surprised as she can, since she has probably been aware of this for a while. I'm actually guessing that Reggie Bush had way more to do with this than any of the Kardashians, and one of his charities probably put the girls in touch with this family or something. That's besides the point; something nice is being done for someone other than themselves. Not only that, but the furniture store is going to hold the furniture for the family until their house is complete.
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Comments (3)
I almost peed myself laughing! Awesome recap. I think everyone that watches this show (which I think is down to you and me, Treading) was screaming at their TV when those whores were acting like they had come up with the charity idea. And I'm still suspicious of Reggie Bush - if he is such a wonderful, caring, giving person, why is he dating a whore with none of those qualities?
1 of 3 | Posted by VegasDarling | Posted on May 23, 2008 9:32 AM
Honestly this could not have been more planned out if they tried. I mean, it was a good cause and it's nice that they did that, but it was like they were acting.
And no mention of how gross it was that Bruce was talking about his sex life with his daughter? They all have such weird relationships with each other.
Loved your recaps though! They were definitely better than the show itself :)
2 of 3 | Posted by yankeesfan | Posted on May 23, 2008 10:44 AM
Hilarious recap. I love how you say what most of us with common sense say when watching this show. It is so ridiculously staged that it's hard to take most of it seriously.
#2: Yeah I'll agree. I know they're all adults and everything, but they are a little too open with each other. I can understand Khloe and Kim talking about it cause they're really close and only a few years apart, but I almost threw up during that episode when Khloe and Kourtney went looking for their mom's vibrator.
3 of 3 | Posted by hollabackboy | Posted on May 23, 2008 2:45 PM