Kris has arranged for everybody to go dogsledding. Kim tells us that sounds amazing, and she says it with the deadest eyes possible. Work on your acting skills sweetheart. Side note, when do you think Kim starts starring in shit movies like The Hottie and the Nottie, etc.? Does she need to do some cameo work first before people begin respecting her acting talent? Despite how AMAZING dogsledding sounds, Kim fakes being sick and goes home because she doesn't want to be with her family.
Back at the cabin, Kim calls up Reggie to komplain. She talks about everything being depressing, and then we see the ENTIRE family having a blast at the dogsledding place. Then we see Kim say she'd rather be home if she's being miserable than being miserable there. More shows of fun. I think they're pointing out the fun Kim is missing. But you know she'd totally hate it anyways. I'm actually surprised she was out on the slopes at all. Reggie asks why she doesn't just come home. He totally wants to record himself fucking her.
That night everyone is sitting around and randomly someone asks where Kim is. Khloe goes to look for her. Opens the bedroom door, no one there, bathroom door, no one there. Khloe looks in the closet, sees no clothes or suitcases. After some fantastic sleuthing, she notices a note on the bed. Well, surely Kim just went somewhere and took all her shit. Maybe the salon. Or the dogsled place. But, Khloe then reads the letter. And it's from Kim! She left! And Khloe can read! Maybe!
The note says something about being treated with disrespect (which isn't the same thing as throwing someone's fucking cell phone, you vapid hag) and Khloe also reads the word "vacay." Kim fucking bitches and pouts the whole time and not everyone pandered to her the entire time, so she's outs. Man, her life is terrible.
You could have made a friend who really understood you, biatch.
So this is totally real. Kim says getting home wasn't as easy as she thought: she has to go to the bus station. Right. Kim Kardashian is going to ride a bus. Ok, I could kind of believe her leaving the family or whatever, but this is absolute shit. She "listens" to the voicemail Khloe left her, and she's waiting in the empty bus station. She decides to call Reggie and, tearfully, she says she thinks she's going to stay. Flex those acting chops!
So she walks back in with her bags and shit, and everyone is so happy she's back. Khloe tackles her, Kris takes her own phone and throws it against the ground, Kendall and Kylie barely nod in her direction. God this is fucking retarded. She fucking ran away, gets all the attention (which is just was she needs) and then comes back and everyone is so happy because they were so worried. She's a fucking adult. I may have just had an aneurism.
So later that night, Kim plays Catchphrase (I think it's that game) with everyone, and they all get along! Hooray for happy endings. And avoiding resolutions, which is in itself a resolution! Also, Bruce sets his alarm for 6:30 to go skiing with the boyz. Kris tells him she loves him the way he is, he doesn't need to go all mid-life, and that settles it. He's standing up the dudes. And, since I'm sure he was actually invited, they're totally going to be very worried in the morning. I bet they cancel going skiing and send out a search party for Bruce. Well, first the call, but it Bruce doesn't answer, then it's search party. Yes, that's surely going to throw a kink in their plans to go skiing. Have I driven home the lack of believability yet? Ok good.
Where's your stick with the little bandana sack on the end?
So that was the episode. What do you think? Kim's swimsuit: awesome, or greatest swimsuit ever? Were those dudes actors or really ski instructors? And don't you hate this entire family except for occasionally Bruce and Kendall and Kylie (and sometimes Kris I guess)?
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Comments (4)
I only watched the beginning of the episode and I only have one comment: is it just me or does Kim look much better without all that spackled-on make up?
1 of 4 | Posted by RTVFan | Posted on May 10, 2008 2:11 AM
i pray daily for the demise of this unholy show, but if it has to exist, the consolation is definitely this recap. bravo.
2 of 4 | Posted by k37744 | Posted on May 10, 2008 10:25 AM
"So this is totally real. Kim says getting home wasn't as easy as she thought: she has to go to the bus station. Right. Kim Kardashian is going to ride a bus. Ok, I could kind of believe her leaving the family or whatever, but this is absolute shit."
I could not stop laughing when I read this. But you're right. If there's any proof that this show is staged, that's it. I doubt Kim would be caught dead on public transportation. And even if she did really want to catch the bus, it seems like too much of a coincidence that she heard Khloe's message right before getting on the bus. JUST IN TIME. Come on, producers. This is too much. Don't insult my intelligence. This was even more obviously staged than where Khloe was crying in the previous episode, but we never saw her face when she was crying. Then when they zoomed in, she had her sunglasses on so we couldn't tell if she was crying.
Real or not, I do think Kim was ganged up on. But, the whole fight was stupid anyway. It shouldn't have lasted more than an episode.
3 of 4 | Posted by hollabackboy | Posted on May 10, 2008 5:36 PM
I agree that the only good thing to come from the stinking heap of garbage that is 'Keeping up with the Kardashians' is in fact, this recap.
She is famous for having a big ass and a sex tape?!?
4 of 4 | Posted by Nemesiis | Posted on May 12, 2008 1:35 PM