Testimonials

Sometimes Ramsay lights the original menu on fire and creates a new place from the ground up, but the whole Irish pub thing has him all lovey dovey, so he decides to teach them how to do what they envisioned in the first place without the whole barfing your face off sound effects part. He starts with the shepherd's pie. Buddy watches on in amazement as Gordon shows them how it's done. Who wouldn't wanna be taught how to make Irish food from a master? Cut to Bad Son shifting back and forth, giggling, and looking around for an escape hatch. Bad Son has been very quiet this episode in front of Ramsay, but every time he gets some private time with the cameras, he's a loud arrogant boner. He thinks its funny that someone would have the nerve to tell him how to make his own recipe, which he got from a guy who knew a guy who went to Ireland.

The dish comes out looking as beautiful as is possible for a meat pie to look, and the staff gathers round to taste it. There is a collective "mmmm!" along with an awkward look away as they all try not to piss off Bad Son by raving about it. He stares at the floor, embarrassed but still silent. Because he hasn't cried or started screaming yet, Gordo brings out Bad Son's soppy oily nasty version and puts it side by side to his own. The waitresses start laughing and saying how gross the original looks, and unfortunately, even though he has been slapped around and pissed on on national tv for two days now, Bad Son stays quiet. On the positive side, he looks like he's gonna cry. Yay! It's almost time to act out!

Come on! You can do it!

He bellies up to the bar with his friends and starts chugging beer and laughing to show them how much of a shit he doesn't give. As he said before, "This ain't my boat, why should I sink on it?". Which came first, philosophy or beer? Discuss. Dinner service starts and Bad Son is determined to show how unaffected he is by being told he's a pathetic looza. It doesn't work. When he gets back to the kitchen, Buddy's there giving him a stern look. He better stop messing around at the bar and do his job! Bad Son paces furiously around and bugs his eyes. "I heard ya! Get oudda heah!"

Gordo keeps his mouth shut and watches Bad Son slowly unravel. When Buddy stands there keeping an eye on him, Bad Son loses it. This is bullshit! Don't tell me what ta do! I coulda been somethin'! Whattdya lookin' at? You wanna piece fat man? Fuck this place! I neva got enough love in my childhood! You'll pay! You'll ALL PAY!!!! With a ball scratch and a wah, Bad Son's outta there. He quits!

If only I had given him more!

With Bad Son most likely pouting and getting his balls scratched at some strip club, Buddy is left to cook the food. Now, Ramsay's new medication is really put to the test. Buddy can't read the tickets, he's cooking everything wrong, he's sweating into the food and dropping dishes. He even forgets to but a bun on a hamburger (in his defense, Gordo's expediting and didn't notice the missing bun either). The table of townie "real people" laughs for about ten minutes about the burger not having a bun. "Heeeey! Who serves a burger without a bun? Hoooo! That's hilarious! Wooooah! Where's the bun?! See that? It's like the old Where's the Beef commercial but I changed it to bun! Heeeey!" Hardyharhahar. Oh, Westhampton real people. You're stahs. Bun drama aside, Buddy doesn't belong in the kitchen. He belongs in Jenny Craig.

The kitchen was even more of a disaster without Bad Son, so when he shows back up at work the next day with his tail between his legs, his family thanks their lucky stars and pats him on the back instead of calling him a lame pussy and making fun of his elf ears and his Jason Wahler my-face-isn't-really-this-huge shaped beard. Wow, I almost didn't see that other third of your mug, weirdo. Obviously, there's no way to ever rid the McBuddy Family of this lunk head, so Gordo decides to have a one on one discussion with the guy and try to talk him into...becoming a real person and not a drunk Irish American loudmouth stereotype? Rome wasn't built in a day, people.

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Posted in Kitchen Nightmares by Flipit at 9:40 PM | Permalink | Comments (14)
Last Comment: dingfriesaredone on Nov 22, 2007 10:32 PM.