OMG, totally lackluster. One thing is clear. Stephen and LC have porked. That boy will put himself up any orifice, I swear. And Kristin's friend, whose name I now think is J.P., showed up at her birthday party, and he had baked her a cake!!!! OMG. So I'm sorry J.P., first season you helped Kristin flirt with that college dude at some other mindless party. And this season you bake her a birthday cake. And you've always lived in Laguna Beach. That is three strikes dude. You are a Gay. Now grab your fake I.D. J.P., immediately proceed to the Boom Boom Room (PCH in South Laguna, near the GAY BEACH), and let's get some Real World, gay guy loner stuff going on, before I totally lose interest in this season. And double OMG, did you here what Talan said to Kristin during their "not hanging out but hanging out" coffee? He said you have a "penis mentality" Kristin. Swear. And I had to immediately call my 19 year old niece to confirm that she's psychic, because last year my niece said the exact same thing about Kristin. Bitchin'. Either that or Talan's been watching too much "Sex and the City", because I think the same thing was said about Samantha, Kristin's obvious role model. Talan also cut his hair, claiming ADD, but he must be on a Ritalin high, because he is the slowest-moving and talking hyperactive kid I've ever seen. Till next week. Love you TVGasm. Keep up the posts.

I'm the biggest fan of "Languna Beach." I also have the DVD. This show is way better than all the Real World/Road Rule challenges combined. MTV should cancel all those shows and put on "Laguna Beach" 24/7. I'm know that'll be difficult to do with all the lines those young actors have to memorize and the many two-shot camera set-ups they'd have to do, but that's fine. Fake drama is good drama as long as the lighting's nice and there are scenes of young people in their swimming outfits.

Come to my blog at www.noelrustia.com if you'd like to discuss.

Please come. Nice stuff.

is the author an intelligent woman or a gay man? anyhoot i believe ms.duff is trying to 'fit a square into a circle', not the other way around... i know, it's sad i actually know the lyrics to the damn song... yes this episode was a lackluster, and the Gay boy's name is Gary. iswear i'm not making that up.

Love your commentaries!!!

I only caught 2 episodes on Sunday from last season I assume, the Morman girl.. is that the one that looks like she is another spawn of the Osmonds ? And forgive me if she is..

Ah yes. I figured it was only a matter of time before recapping this show resulted in the inevitable emasculating comment. Guna Watcher -- I am indeed a straight man.

I kind of assumed that Tyler was her previous boyfriend. Tyler and Taylor.
now it's Talan and Taylor, although i think we can pretty much assume that Talan won't be sticking around much, if this episodes events are any clue.

i would have to agree that this week was certaintly lackluster.

i was kind of weirded out that kristin and LCs birthdays were on the same days...

B-Unit, this was a brave step in your personal development. Yell it to the heavens, at the corner of Santa Monica and Robertson - "NO MORE LIES - I'M STRAIGHT!" And Guna Watcher, there may also be a Gary gay guy, cuz this is after all Laguna Beach, and things don't get any gayer than Guna in the O.C., but J.P., whoever he is, did bake Kristin a birthday cake. Just rewatched it on my TiVo. But he also looked like he was patting some other girl next to him on the head, so he's probably bi.

Weird things about this episode:
1. Kaitlyn's singing. She's like one of those American Idol kids who must have been told by their parents they have a nice voice.
2. LC and Kristen's shared birthday.
3. Stephen's awkwardness at saying goodbye to LC. Couldn't he have kissed her at least? Instead he acted like an idiot guy.
4. The moms. LC's doesn't even seem to care that she is going to Mexico. Don't you think LC would mention this to her mom at some point before she started packing? And Taylor's mom seemed way too excited about the possibility of Taylor being kissed by Talan.

I think I remember Mormon Morgan saying that she would be going to SMU. Maybe she said BYU. I am not sure.

Awww, you guys, I liked this episode! Not lackluster at all! OK, granted the LC/Stephen vacation was way lame. Maybe that's why Stephen can never quite fully commit to LC-in spite of the fact that she is lovely and mostly sweet, I think she sort of bores him, whereas Kristin is "exciting" and challenging to Stephen because he doesn't know what to expect from her next.
It was heartbreaking/facinating to watch LC just gaze and gaze at Stephen with that total adulation that will never be returned. I mean, I feel for the girl! ( Haven't we all been there with someone at least once in our lives?) She needs to get a plan though, a job, some community college classes, something. As dimwitted as her friends seem, at least all of them are in college partying and not just at home post-high school partying like LC.
On the Kristin front, personally, I will never like any female friend enough to buy her anything from Tiffany's, OK? I mean are "Roz" and Kristin f*cking? Give me a break. B-Side, thank you for also wondering what the draw-both male and female- that Kristin seems to have. Physically, I don't see it either, but I must say she does look better than last year. Hang in there, B-Side, the episodes will get better. Keep up the good work on the posts-I'm eternally grateful to you for them.

Someone needs to sit down and count the number of times the word "like" was said during this show. ts the only thing I can remember from the one time I, like, watched it and stuff.

OK gang, like help me out, mmm-kay? Is it like, just my imagination, or did like Casey totally go back-side-of-the-milk-carton missing? Like, you know, she was the pageant queen with her own personal hairdresser. Did she get kidnapped by those same awful, awful people who bagged Jonbenet Ramsey? Or (more probably) was it just a simple case of toxic hair dye, like that "Closer" episode a couple weeks ago? So, like (I'm trying to mix up the "like" usage EdH, and it is more addictive than smack, so don't read too much more), I'm dying to know (pun intended). Was she on this episode or AWOL? That would be so cool if she like joined the army because of some hot guy from Chico like Ryan and was like somewhere like Afghanistan or something. Beats Baja, fer sure. xoxo. Love ya'll. Keep me posted.

LC is a raging doncho whore. She needs to be given botox, like her mom, so she stops making the most assinine facial expressions of all time. Kristin rules!!!

B-Side, it is so hilarious how you rip Kristin! I don't like her either. I loved how you referred to the b-day phone call from Stephen and she hangs up saying why can't he just grow up and talk to me. I was thinking the same thing you wrote. I can't stand how she makes their conversations all weird then turns around and blames him. Kristin has mad issues. Did you all notice how during the trip to Mexico Stephen and LC were all over each other but never kissed once? They would look like they're about to kiss but end up rubbing their faces on one another or getting their nose licked, or kissing their hair, etc. but never on the mouth.... weird.

I see the teenage power that Kristin has. She is too cool for anyone so all the boys want her plus she keeps practically bragging that she is a sl*t so there is that too... Stephen is the typical high school boy that knows LC "looooovvves" him but he loves Kristin because now she doesnt love him - so he likes LC and will bang her behind closed doors but in public - NO WAY. Plus he doesnt want to hurt her feelings because he likes her but doesnt "like her" does no one here remember high school like I DO??!! Kristin is the typical "Mean Girl" who rules by intimidation but has no real friends. Plus you can tell she really thinks she is hot sh*t this year since she is now the "star" her attitude is way fake and over the top. Like the person in the room who is too loud pretending not to notice anyone else but wanting everyon to look at them.

Mormon Morgan went to BYU and Christina was accepted to SMU, but didn't go. She is pursuing her "acting" career in LA. And because I haven't been able to completely repress the NY episode where she auditioned for Broadway, may God have mercy on all our souls if she gets a gig!!!

#5 -- we all knew that already.

Check out '05 'Guna prom pics at http://web.sendtoprint.net/proofbook/LogIn.asp --- use the code: Alcone-SarahProm to view photos. Page 13 features some really fugly photos of Casey, complete with fake hair, tits, teeth, and tan, all clad in a skankolicious prom smock. Her date looks like he's pushing 40 too.

Hootch-
Thanx for the link.
CAN NOT BELIEVE Casey's getup.
She looks like a total whore.
Crazy. My parents would NEVER have let me outta the house looking like that when I was that age (in fact, they'd probably try to stop me from leaving the house now, at 31, in that trampy getup!).

what the fuck was the deal with talans hair?

your comments made me cry. too funny.

oh my god... you kill me. I seriously was dying at this recap. I'm so glad other people hate Kristin... every time she says Stephen is being mean or immature, I swear, it's like the sound puppies being tortured... pure evil.

do you think "Kristin's friend" Alex is just hanging out with her more to be on the show, because she wasn't cute enough to get cast, or do you think they're legit friends??

Kristin looks nice though in the photos. I don't think she is fake looking, much more natural than Casey.

There are no photos of Jessica - did she go to the prom? And, what about Jason - I didn't see any of him either. Perhaps he shaved off his beard and it's hard to find him.

It looks like Kristin went with Talan to the prom. Well, at least he didn't go with Taylor. Speaking of Taylor, did you see her date? He's a short, red headed guy - very funny.

Okay...what to say...this crap is actually REAL--these are real kids who go to a real (my old) high school, I know some of them from church and community stuff. Yes, those are their $200 sunglasses and yes, those new beemers and Benzes are theirs or hand-me-downs from mommy and daddy. Yes, they dress like that in real life. None of them are actors but I've heard some now want to get into the Biz, including Mr. Wooden Face, Talan. Christina (from last year) got accepted into SMU, but instead got implants and went to Hollywood instead. At homecoming last year she was signing football programs! (I was so tempted to go get one, jumping up and down and squealing like a teenybopper, then tossing it away ;) Good things: Dieter ran/biked 75 MILES from San Diego to LB to raise money for suicide prevention/depression ($10,000), Trey is very involved in youth involvement, Polster is just a sweet human being.

Stuff that ISN'T REAL: a lot of the conversations are repeated w/cameras present, which is why they sound fake. Secondary characters are told to ask primary characters the juicy stuff ("So, do you think Jason's hot?" "Do you want to screw Casey?" etc) to set up scenes.

Producers set up (i.e. pay for) "situations" like the B/W party last year if they think it would be good TV fireworks, and the kids "run into" each other a lot downtown. Before the first season, producers asked one of the now secondary characters to get a girlfriend, get really serious, then dump her right before prom. Another character was encouraged to drink heavily (imagine an "Intervention" episode). Both refused and were demoted from "Starring" characters to secondary.

I love reading message boards like this...so funny. Until last year I had to describe my tiny hometown as somewhere between LA and San Diego!

OMG okay what is up with LC and Stephen????? God Stephen is the hottest guy i have ever seen in my whole life, and there are like millions of girls who would die 4 him yet still he is trying to get Kristen back, and isnt hooking up with LC. Or is he hooking up with LC like the time they spent the night together, did they do anything off camera? I AM SO CONFUSED!!!!

ok....jessica ur bf jason is cheating on u with that ugly ass alex and talan i like u with kristen better than taylor she look like a fucking i dont kno but she is really uglyyy and alex is so uglyy and kristen i like for u talan your soo hott!!!!!!!! jason your hott too but if i was u i wouldnt sheat on jessica because fucking alex look like shitt she so fucking ugly and jessica look better than her uglyness...

this had to be one of the funniest articles i have read in a long time

Lc and Stephen are so cute toghter! Kristin is just a slut and she knos it! Lc is so awesome she totally acts like me! So rock on Lc and kick Kristin to the curve! Love Laguna Beach!

You're commentary on this show is off the hook!! you should charge for this stuff... (not really though, i don't want to pay)

stephen and lc need to be together

There's no way Stephen and LC have don it. No way.
First off, she is way too Princess to give it away.
Second, he is ultimately a good kid.
Third, I am 99.9% a beleiver that these kids are in that generation of not going all the way but doing absolutely everything else. I am not making this up, it's like a gigantic movement. I think the deal is sex with a boyfriend is ok but sex with a hook up is not.
I swear, I have heard about this from my friends with high school kids. There's a complicated bracelet system to show how far you'll go on a hook up.

Thank god we didn't have rules like these in the 90s, when I was their age!

OMG kristin u r so pretty i admire u i wanna look just like u. U ROCK!!!! and u look good with talan and any guy bc ur so pretty!!!! and LC and taylor are GAY and taylor looks like a man god shes UGLY. well ur awesome u make the whole show worth being on MTV ur so cool i watch the show every monday at 10 I LOVE LAUGUNA BEACH!!!!!!!

Hilary Duff, who once again regaled us with her timeless musing about fitting circles into the squares. So geometric, yet so poetic. This lyric, by the way, confirms my suspicions that Hilary Duff still plays with Fisher Price toys.

hahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahaahaha