She informs the contestants that for their final audition they will perform three numbers from Legally Blonde, complete with actual set pieces, costumes, and cast members. They have one day to get it all down before auditioning in front of the judges PLUS Jerry Mitchell, the show's director who's been totally M.I.A. the whole season, leaving his minions to evaluate and sculpt the contestants on his behalf.
Even though they've got their work cut out for them, Duff reassures Bailey and Autumn, "You won't be alone." Aw, Duff. You're finally stepping up to the plate as mentor and giving them some help! "You'll have Denis, Marc and Seth!"
Sigh. And out trot the three coaches that have worked with the girls all season.
LET'S GET THIS OVER WITH ALREADY
The first task at hand is to get the ladies used to moving in and out of and around and through the complex sets. In comes a flight of stairs and they have to run up them, while the whole set piece is still moving. Wee! They all nearly fall off. I wish one of them had.
IT'S JUST LIKE COMING HOME DRUNK
Then it's time to go over the singing and, much to Autumn's dismay, the dancing. Once again Autumn is like "Blah blah I can't dance." Well then maybe you shouldn't be in this role? Am I talking nonsense here?
OH...SO IT'S THAT KINDA SHOW...
After that, both contestants talk about how hard and confusing the rehearsal was. They are just blown away by all of the costumes and the cast members dancing around them and having to learn all of their lines. I'm not quite sure what they expected it would be like to perform on Broadway...
And then it's time to wrap up the training montage and go back to the Pink House. They're happy to finally relax and have some salad for dinner. Wait, salad? You've just rehearsed for like 16 hours and you're having salad?
CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH
With their tummies full (ish), the girls split up to practice on their own for a little while before bedtime. Autumn tells the cameras that she may not want this more than Bailey, but she believes that she is more prepared and has made a more thorough journey. We're back on this again, eh Autumn? You've been working at this longer and so you deserve it. Look, I was with you the first few times you said it, but now it's getting tired. Especially because you're performances are sort of dull.
BUT I'M OLD
I don't even like Bailey and I'm on her side here. Autumn, suck it up!
Audition time roles around and the ladies get prepped and ready to go. Autumn even gets a wig. She looks a lot more Elle-like for sure, but this begs the question: If she was just gonna wear a wig, why did they dye her hair? Poor thing!
SOMEONE'S GONNA PAY FOR THIS
All of the judges are present, of course, but now the bonus judge Jerry Mitchell is here at last, back from whatever cave or multi-million dollar condo kept him hidden all these weeks.
WELL-RESTED
The girls are sent to their dressing rooms to hang out before the auditions start. All seems to be going pretty normally...but this wouldn't be a reality TV show without wacky surprises!
Cue Mom and Dad!
Into Autumn's and Bailey's dressing rooms walk their parents, who are of course greeted with joyful squeals. Bailey's so happy she collapses into fits on the floor like one of those crazies at her church when her minister father releases their demons.
HEAL ME
Now that there is absolutely nothing more that we can possibly do to delay the auditions, let's finally get on with the show!
Bailey is up first, performing "Ohmigod You Guys," one of the songs from an earlier audition in the season.
I KNOW I DO
The judges are completely impressed and Jerry looks like he's in love.
DREAMY
But before you go thinking Bailey's got this one in the bag, wait til you see Jerry's face when he's watching Autumn.
YOWZAH!
It's clear that she's giving it her all in this audition. And it's also painfully clear that her voice is about 20 times better than Bailey's.
But if there's anything that's going to hold her back, it will be that she doesn't quite look the part. Or, at least not as well as Bailey does. No matter how hard she tries.
I THINK I CAN I THINK I CAN
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Comments (10)
i was rooting(sp?) for bailey the whole time! buttt my friend is in the show, and she said that baileys contract is only for 2 weeks! EEK!
1 of 10 | Posted by preppyboy | Posted on July 23, 2008 10:04 PM
I always watch this show on OnDemand so I'm always a week late with reading your recaps. HOWEVER!!! Last night a commercial came on for stupid, Inside Edition, where I was treated with the spoiler. I was devasted. However your recap has made me less upset because it was so funny.
I'm pissed Bailey won. I loved Autumn, but I know she just couldn't dance well enough. You will get you chance one day Autumn! I do find peace in knowing that Bailey's contract is only two weeks though. HAHA, but wait...does that mean that they are holding REAL auditions for the REAL next Elle Woods? Autumn this could be it!!
2 of 10 | Posted by MrsBojangles | Posted on July 24, 2008 5:14 AM
I really wanted Autumn to win but knew from the very beginning of the show that it would be Bailey.
I read that she had a 6 month contract but I'm wondering if they have a clause in there that after 2 weeks or so if ticket sales aren't good, they could replace her. Seems though that with all the training etc. they've probably done with her, they wouldn't want to start from scratch with someone totally knew.
3 of 10 | Posted by murphena | Posted on July 24, 2008 7:45 AM
Thanks so much for the recaps all season.
Just thought you (and everyone should know) that there is a silver (or is it pink) lining for the top 4.
Autumn has been cast in the ensemble on Broadway and will be Bailey's understudy.
Lauren will be the Elle understudy in the national tour (also in the ensemble)
and Rhiannon is going to be Margot (one of the three "greek chorus" members) in the national tour.
4 of 10 | Posted by hightemp | Posted on July 24, 2008 8:09 AM
I live in NY and I have friends who are with the show and said that there is a 2-week clause in her contract. Wouldn't that be funny if Bailey's p*ssy got the boot after two weeks, but Autumn stayed. Ha! Bailey does look good dancing, but there's just something about her that I don't like. I don't know what it is.
5 of 10 | Posted by ReeseWitherspoon | Posted on July 24, 2008 9:01 AM
Thanks for the recap! Your captions make my life, I love "I poisoned your muffin."
By the end of the season I liked Autumn more, even though I think she looked like an old soccer mom once they wigged her up. Seems like she might have the better deal anyway though! Yay Autumn!
6 of 10 | Posted by BaileyQuarters | Posted on July 24, 2008 10:48 AM
I just want to know where I can get one of those wonderful, wonderful robes.
7 of 10 | Posted by surviving myself | Posted on July 24, 2008 11:04 AM
Oh dear. Bailey's not gonna last 6 months in this production. No way. She's just not a strong enough singer or actor. She was actually technically the weakest actor throughout the whole thing (well, Cassie S. not included...) so it's kind of ridiculous to me that she won to begin with. If her voice was at least strong I would understand, but her singing is often off pitch and lacks power and finesse.
Ah well.
At least we know now that Autumn is in the Ensemble AND understudying for Bailey. Hopefully Bailey gets sick a LOT. And in case anyone here didn't know, Rhiannon has been cast in the touring production as Margot (the main Sorority sister), which is really the role she was right for to begin with, and Lauren is cast in the same production as understudy for Elle Woods. So hooray for the girls. At least it's evident now that the producers really DID want to recast the show and it wasn't all a complete publicity stunt.
8 of 10 | Posted by tzohar | Posted on July 24, 2008 12:36 PM
Anyone catch the look on Bailey's dad's face when she was doing those pelvic thrusts in the last song? I thought fire and brimstone would flash out of his eyes and scorch her right in the hoohaw.
You could just see him thinking: "Now where'd she learn about that?"
I prefer Autumn, think she's beautiful, like the spunky personality, great voice. Be interesting if she can make a career out of this. Maybe a few dance lessons.
I can't imagine Bailey doing much beyond this. Seems like there's plenty of her type of blonde out there.
9 of 10 | Posted by itchy | Posted on July 24, 2008 3:40 PM
I guess I feel better knowing that Autumn and some of the others still got cast.
I don't feel as good as I would if I just never bothered watching this show to begin with.
But still.
10 of 10 | Posted by hollywood sucker | Posted on July 25, 2008 11:22 AM