Testimonials

Wendy drags her husband to Mariska's house since the former nanny always liked Shane and Wendy knows that he can reason with her. Wendy is still confused about which lanky, bird-like, British twit leaked information about her, until Shane finally confesses that he used to confide in Mariska when Wendy would make him upset. Like the time she forgot their anniversary or delayed a second in responding when he asked her if he looked fat. Wendy is shocked since she never saw that one comin', although all of us did, and leaves in an angry snit, leaving Shane standing alone in the Flushing projects.

"You can't just leave me here. The Puerto Rican Transvestites will use me like currency!"

Victory is frantically calling her ex-assistant Reese to help her retrieve her stupid hat. Reese doesn't have time to chat and offers to call Victory back since Reese is busy interviewing for a job using Victory's stolen sketches.

Nico is working and receives an IM from Kirby containing a picture of her hot, bare, ass. While she admires the George Michael-like curvature of her milkshake, Victory suddenly comes in and asks to use Nico's computer.

"Damn it, he didn't even get my beaver. I'll never get to meet Larry Flynt."

Wendy is back at work when her husband walks in, freshly mugged and multiply raped. Shane sits down gingerly and apologizes for confiding in the nanny, but Wendy hurt his feelings by taking off to fix some movie and in-turn postponing her daughter's birthday party. Shane tells Wendy that he was just angry then and knows that Wendy is a good mother, unlike Shaft who was a bad mother. He encourages Wendy to take down Janice Lasher if that's what it takes and promises to stand by her looking haggard and scruffy for as long as it takes.

Back at Nico's office, Victory is obsessively looking up information about this damn hat on the Wide, Wide World of the Interweb when Nico stops her and reminds Victory that the hat means nothing as is not even an interesting plot device. It's behind her, like her fat ass and Victory has to look forward where he saggy breasts dangle. The two ladies have their heart to heart interrupted when the intercom announces that Hector is on his way in for a meeting.

The following business meeting takes place between 6 PM and 7 PM.

Victory leaves and Hector informs Nico that Prince William signed a contract with Bonfire and will be appearing on the cover of next month's Bonfire. This should be good news, but Nico went behind Hector's back to do it and that is some crap with up which he will not put. Nico stands her ground and reminds Hector that he used to trust her and if he no longer does, then she should go back to her job demo-ing cuticle scrapers at the mall. Hector stares for a moment before walking out of her office leaving Nico wondering what priggish, British hell she's in for tomorrow.

Wendy enters Janice Lasher's office full of bravado and mascara. Wendy reminds Janice that if a man canceled a birthday party for his kid no one would think twice about it, but when a woman does it she's a pariah. Janice reminds Wendy that she is the antagonist of the show and not Wendy's therapist, before Wendy rises to leave, grabbing her enormous handbag on the way out. Wendy tells Janice to go ahead and publish the book but reminds Janice that it will be her legacy of bashing successful women just like Burt Reynolds. When Wendy walks out of the office she begins to cry but steadies herself with thoughts of puppies being euthanized and giggles just a little. All the pictures are caught on camera by a mysterious paparazzo from across the street.

Wendy cries but is lucky enough to have Bea Arthur's hand to wipe away her tears.

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Posted in Lipstick Jungle by FozzieBare at 4:38 AM | Permalink | Comments (6)
Last Comment: jito on Feb 21, 2008 11:53 AM.