Nico has had a full day: wooing a prince, screwing a photographer and posing for Internet porn. She enters the elevator to find Hector inside the car alone and Nico enters for the long awkward, ride to hell. Hector grabs the emergency stop button and Nico rolls her eyes but begins to take off her panties. Hector speaks and tells Nico that he had started looking for a new person to fill her job by posting an ad on Craigslist. He says that she is smart and talented by even the most brilliant team players have a coach and a plan and can't win the game playing alone. All of these sports metaphors are lost on Nico but he tells her to not be such a bitch and listen to him and she'll be fine.
"Love in an elevator, livin' it up while I'm goin' down."
Mr. Big-Small arrives at Victory's apartment with take-out food, a lot of fake charm and most important of all, the hat that she's been chasing for days. Victory begins to cry and tells Joe that just a year ago she was on top of the world with 12 stores, magazine covers and an assistant that would never steal and now he has to come along and constantly save her. Joe reminds Victory that he's not saving her; he's actually saving himself or some such nonsense. They kiss and I throw up in my mouth a little. Not from the show, although that didn't help. I think I just had some bad shrimp.
"Seriously? This hat? Really? Come on!"
Later we see the three girls striding down the street arm in arm demonstrating all the girl power they possess. Nico casually mentions something about her dissatisfaction with her husband and how it's not natural for people to get everything from one person. When her two friends overreact, she reminds them that she's just talking nonsense and distracts the girls with mention of marguerites.
Back at Janice Lasher's office, she is viewing the pictures of Wendy crying outside of her office and informs her assistant to send one of them to Page Six with the caption "Tsunami for Bad Mommy." I would have personally gone with "Mommy Weepest" or "Puddle of Muddah."
"Are you looking at my wrinkled, mole covered, ample cleavage? Why not?"
So what did you think? Will Nico's husband find out about her torrid affair with Malcom in the Middle? Will Wendy's book be published by Harvey Firestein? Will Nico find true love and happiness with Anthony Michael Hall? Tune in next week to find out. In the meantime, please leave a comment. I'm beggin' ya!
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Comments (6)
Good recap....i liked it
1 of 6 | Posted by missymiss | Posted on February 20, 2008 5:21 AM
You lost me at Chinky
2 of 6 | Posted by tifne22 | Posted on February 20, 2008 9:44 AM
So funny! You're captions were the best. "You know what's really scary? I never did find that orange." LMAO.
3 of 6 | Posted by rachw00 | Posted on February 20, 2008 6:09 PM
Hey guys,
Thanks for the comments. I did remove the previously mentioned word lest I go down the path of Isaiah Washington and end up on Bionic Woman (shudder). Racism are humor are so interchangeable in my mind that I didn't even remember writing it until someone pointed it out. While still one of my favorite slurs, I did remove it. I did leave in all of the stuff about spousal abuse, rape, immigrant abuse, sexual harrassment, child abuse and dirty sanchezes. If your name is Sanchez, I mean no offense. :o)
4 of 6 | Posted by fozziebare13 | Posted on February 21, 2008 6:49 AM
Nico (Kim Raver) looks like the mask in the movie "Scream."
5 of 6 | Posted by cattyfan | Posted on February 21, 2008 11:50 AM
Bea Arthur's hand! Seriously, how old is Brooke Shields now? That hand came out of nowhere.
6 of 6 | Posted by jito | Posted on February 21, 2008 11:53 AM