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And she scores!!! NICE, NANAHAN! Later that night, Dina and her brother corner Nana in the kitchen. Dina starts her "you're going to Vegas" rant, Nana loops "OH HELL NO" over and over, and Paul just shrugs and says "she doesn't have to go if she doesn't want to." Big help there, Paul. Thanks for coming over. I would call this the most pointless scene ever, but we've already watched two games of horse today.

While Dina walks around the backyard talking to Mike about how to drug Nanahan and get her on the plane without her knowing, Cody and Ali try to devise a plan to get Mike and Nina back together. They can't make him less of a self absorbed dickhead, so Ali suggests singing them a love song. Cody covers his ears and starts crying. I guess that's a no. They decide that they will make a romantic dinner for the couple. Awww. It's just like The Parent Trap! But without any talent or budget or entertainment value.

McVana gets Nanahan alone in the Lindsay shrine to hound her. Goddammit this is seriously getting old. Nanahan says no. She has a lot of sitting around to do at home and she will miss talking to her talking dog. Ok, Barbara Walters. As she leaves, she says that she would rather not be asked into the office ever again because the cut outs of Lindsay everywhere are starting to freak her out.

Stop being an asshole, mom.

Cody and Ali, in all their wackiness, "make dinner". Yikes. They basically throw a raw chicken on a plate and unbag some frozen asparagus. While they cook, Slohan calls Nina and tells her that Mike wants to see her. When that doesn't work, she says that Mike broke out in bumps all over his penis and they need her to come see the family doctor. Nina shows up, and the kids go up to get Mike and...commercial. WHAT? I'M DYING TO SEE HOW THIS ALL TURNS OUT!

My guess is that Mike will try to make Nina understand that his family is very big and important and they need to be given more attention than her poor Nonhan family. Or they both die of food poisoning before a word is spoken. I'm hoping for the latter. A Jackie Warner Workout Video commercial comes on and dang, does she go to Dina's doctor?

The only things missing here are a bad weave and a cut out of Lindsay behind her.

Sure enough, the fight is resolved when Nina realizes that Mike's family needs all of her attention because they are famous. She vows to never speak to her parents again and then the evening ends in a kiss. I'm just so fucking fulfilled by that. Aren't you? They couldn't stomach the chicken, so callously, they feed it to the dogs.

Well, at least no one has to worry about boarding the little beasts. Bury em in the backyard and pack Nanahan in the trunk. Time for Vegas!

Ali comes to the kitchen and sees that the chicken is missing. She shouts "HEY! YOU FED 'EM TA THUH DOWAAAGS!" This girl has star written all over her.

The wain in Spain fowalls mainly owan the pwain. Perfect! Places!

Nanahan comes over with a picture of her dead husband for Ali's birthday, since she's gonna miss it. Were they out of Wiis at Best Buy? Oh, grandmas. My grandma once gave me a crumpled up bullet to remember my Grandpa by, even though he never fought in a war. I was like, huh? Do you have twenty bucks? Ali has the same reaction. Cody, though, pulls his grandpa's mass card out of his shin guard to show Nana. He keeps it there to remember the old man, and it's so goddamn sweet. Why is he even on this show? Nanahan reads the poem on the back of the card and cries, and it's hard for me not to squeeze a couple out along with her. Then I see Dina try to move her new mouth and I start laughing again.

Maybe Lindsay would call me if my lips were this big. I'm just not ever pretty enough! WAAAAHH.

McVana finally realizes that her mother doesn't want to leave her house because she is depressed about the death of her husband. Either that, or she knows that since she opened a floodgate, Nanahan's likely to cry the entire trip and there will be enough painful wailing coming from the studio. Either way, Dina relents and leaves her mother alone. THANK YOU.

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Posted in Living Lohan by Flipit at 6:00 AM | Permalink | Comments (6)
Last Comment: smolls on Jun 25, 2008 03:00 PM.