Making the Band 4: This Show Needs a First-Aid Kit Handy

So I really wasn't sure whether or not I wanted to recap yet another season of Making the Band. I just didn't know if anyone was still paying attention to all of that faux drama anymore. But then Flipit kept sending me season previews, and I just knew that I had to get back in the game. I mean, someone needs to sacrifice his/herself to cover all these catfights for everyone, right? So here we are, Gasmii. Hopefully we won't regret it.

Picture 5.png

Danity Kane (minus the personality)

When our new season opens, it looks more like an episode of "Paranormal State" than it does anything on MTV. We see the city in tones of grey, with eerie, ghostly music playing over the background. Wouldn't it be awesome if we got to re-live the story of Orangebrey, and at the end, an old woman to hobble out and say, "That's my niece you describe...And she's been dead for 50 years...." (You know, like that old hitchhiker ghost story? Yes?) Well, no such luck! The Orange is still alive and kickin' it, only girl ain't on this season! So where the drama will come from, I really haven't any clue. Maybe we'll just get some major bitchassness from those lazy boys over in Day 26.

Right away we are hit with a flashback from four months ago when the girls of Danity Kane told Diddy how unhappy they were. Unless you've been living under a rock, then you must know that Orangey and D.Woods were kicked out of the group. And now our three remaining members -- Aundrea, Dawn, and Shannon -- tearfully tell us how speechless they are because they really do care about one another and don't want to lose their dreams.

Picture 4.png

They must be chopping an onion off-screen.

Okay, ladies, I'm just not buying it. You really can't tell me that these girls aren't just at least a *tiny* bit excited that the giant Orangina has left the building! Now there is no one to tart up their image and inject DK with a little STD. The show's syphilis odds have officially dropped by 150% percent. They have to be grinning on the inside at least a bit, and we all know it. The tears are for themselves because now their fate is in the fickle hands of Diddy and his ever-changing mind.

Picture 3.png

FYI: Dawn has now made full transformation into Judy Jetson.

Then the man himself appears and tells us that breaking up is a reality in the music business. He cites some examples: The Beatles, *N Sync, Destiny's Child, Outkast. By the way, he just loosely compared Danity Kane to The Beatles. I'm not sure that those words should ever be breathed in the same sentence EVER. AGAIN. But, I get his point. If The Beatles can break up, then I suppose anyone can. And, in this case, Orangebrey is just an under weight, over-sexed Yoko Ono.

The show's intro is REALLY weird without D.Woods and Orangebrey. And also weird that Shannon is still in the picture even though I heard she's no longer in the band and will not be on the show. But are we really going to miss that paper personality? Girl was a big snooze and y'all know it! She always seemed to me like she was against all fun. The could probably just prop up a cardboard cut-out of her in the background, and we'd never know the difference.

After the credits, Diddy appears in a very perky mood, and gives us a little recap. He tells us that Danity Kane has been acting crazy; Brillo is "in a fight for his life" because he has not yet had a hit; Day26 is going to London; and Diddy is working on his new album, but I won't say the name of it because I don't want to give him a plug. In fact, I think the whole reason for this season is just so he can plug himself. Not because he actually wants to make DK reconcile. Well the only plug he's getting here is a foot-shaped butt plug because he really deserves a kick in the ass!

Now we see Brian, you know, the one with the corn rows and anger management problem? He talks like Mickey Mouse and generally screeches out his frustrations in octaves that are barely heard by humans. The dudes are already in London and are checking into their big fancy hotel. They are baffled that cars drive on the wrong side of the street and other ignorant things. All is happy and well in the English Land of Day26.

Picture 7.png

Well hellooooooo Jonas Brothers Scarf!

Making the Band 4: This Show Needs a First-Aid Kit Handy Sections:  1  |  2  |  3  |  4 

« Amazing Race: I've Got Your Noses, Bitches! | Main | Ugly Betty: Papi Gets Some Hot Action! Aye Caramba! »

Comments (9)

Tadow:

Hi Manda, I will follow this with you! When I saw the shot of Danity Kane I thought they could of used something that showed the third girls face. Then you commented that we would likely be fooled by a cardboard cutout and everything became clear. Thanks for the recap!

blahblah:

I'm reading along...
Can't believe Puff has the nerve to renew this show with half a hit group. Making the Ego

anicho01:

I have to agree, while I think Dawn is interesting, Diddy's removal of the women who actually boosted the image of Danity Kane (be it thru blatant sexuality or not) actually helped people want to purchase/download their CDs. Plus, all of Orange's suggestions last year (they need a manager, more attention, etc.) were spot on.

Sure, Diddy might have women who might not outshine him & will willingly follow his orders, but that equals a boring band & boring show. I hope D.K. & the show's ratings decrease to teach Didy's ego a lesson -

Y3KPhenom:

I didn't even know this show was back on! I was wondering how they would deal with the loss of their two members. I have never been a fan of Diddy (he seems like a real jerk to me), but honestly, I don't really care that Orangebrey was kicked out of the group, but I do feel a bit sorry for D.Woods and the rest for getting caught up in a bad situation. Diddy is an egomaniac, but I'm pretty sure that the girls knew the deal when they signed up. You know, how we are all so willing to put up with anything for more $$$ until it actually happens.

Although, I have issues with how he went about it, Orangebrey really was going a little too far. I mean, their key demographic is kind of young and having one of your group members posing naked or half-naked whenever possible can't be good. I really wish our society didn't put such a high premium on bringing drama. Still, I'm sure that there's a lot more to this situation than we get to see.

Also, I did buy the Day 26 album at a store closing for a couple of bucks and it really is good.

J-Mo:

Hey MandaMo, funny recap! I have to agree with you about the general laziness of these guys, it seems like they just don't appreciate that their "job" is, oh, only about a zillion times more fun than the rest of us have to deal with, but it seems like they're so damned blasé about everything. Sad.

HEY, if Duddy's gonna start a new music group, I bet Kimmie from Real Housewives of Atlanta is in the market to join!!! After all, she has "worked" with Dallas Austin! Maybe he should take some of the cast-offs from "Rock Of Love" and "Shot At Love" and "Butt-Plugs Of Love" and put them in a group and see if he can't make a buck that way.

love to you!

J-Mo :)

dreamkeeper:

When it comes to the DK segments I miss Orange. She might be a mess but she always had lots of funny one liners and who else in their group is going to stand up to Diddy so we can see him snap off at them. That's the only thing he brings to the show (that and the term "Bitchassness").

I think all the fighting on Day 26 starts because of Roberts mouth. Yeah Brian has anger problems and Q can be defensive but Robert never knows when to shut up. His mom must have really spoiled him.

MandaMo:

J-Mo: Omg! I've been so wrapped up in Housewives of OC and NYC that I'd forgot about our girl Kimmie! Come to think of it, wasn't her "album" supposed to "drop" in January!?!?!?

xoxo

MrsBojangles:

Great recap! I LOLed quite a few times.

I HATE DIDDY! His ego is always threatening to burt through the TV and strangle me. Its too much! What in the hell makes him think that we want to see more of him on this season? That song he was recording when Dawn "just so happened to walk in" was God awful!

Also, why does he keep trying to make it seem like D Woods and Aubrey quit and therefore put him in a bad position? Asshole, you kicked them out! If you're in a bad position its all your fault! Why does he do this? What good comes from dismantling these groups? The only thing I can think of is that its on purpose and it gives him an excuse to have a new season and look for a new group. He's horrible.

thatswhatshesaid:

I, for one, am SO GLAD you are recapping this show!!! I laughed out loud mucho times! I love this show anyway and reading the snarky recap makes it just that much more enjoyable! Brava!
I had the exact same thoughts that you did in so many places, starting with the sloppy "closure" of Big Butter being lost in London. Lame. I'm sick of seeing Day 26 fight. They are all so immature. I can see them imploding all on their own. At least Danity Kane kept their crap under wraps. And how stupid was that whole evacuation scene in the London hotel? I would have been p.i.s.s.e.d had that been me lugging my crap all the way down to the lobby only to find out it had been a drill. Lame again. The camera men never seemed to panic though, which I thought was odd. At least THEY must have known it was just a drill.

Post a comment

Post a comment

85