First of all, I would like to apologize for the lateness of this week's Making the Band recap. In a tragic turn of unexpected events, my two month old MacBook totally crapped out, leaving me MacLess for four days and counting. Don't worry, I've sent letters of complaint directly to Justin Long. Meanwhile, our favorite Diddy-based reality show continues to follow the same pattern as the past few weeks, complete with 30 solid minutes of concert montages, fabricated drama that is diffused as quickly as it is introduced, and Orangebrey says something stupid.
Well well well. Look what the monkey dragged in. It seems like Brillo's "Take You There" has been replaced as the show's theme song by Danity Kane's "Bad Girl." Yet another genius marketing ploy by Sean Combs, it would seem. Just when Brillo's song finally started to grow on me, he ripped the rug right from underneath my feet to plant a new song in my ear. Very clever, Mr. Dids. Always one step ahead of me, I see. Sadly, that is the only surprise of this episode.
We open the show as the entire gang is going to Atlantic Records to work on ad drops for their tour. Please note: This is exactly how last week's show started. Remember? Both bands and Brillo were doing promos at radio stations and recording commercials? This show is getting so repetitive that I wonder how many of you are even watching anymore, or now if the only viewers are somehow related to and/or paid by the producers. Luckily those fans of us who are still trudging through this season are consistently rewarded with shirtless shots of Willie, and that is almost as good as payment.
ANYWAY, we go back and forth between Day26 and Danity Kane who are struggling to read simple cue cards. The guys are actually pretty entertaining because at first they all read the same cue card at the exact same time, and it's funny watching them talk over one another. And in the next take, Mike reads the whole card by himself but in a really strange robot/rapper voice. The girls, on the other hand, stumble and stutter all over the words. The producers shoot each other glances of concern.
Afterwards, we catch up with Dawn and Que who are walking down a busy New York street, hand in hand. They tell us that each other is amazing, but it's hard because the two groups are always split up. Dawn tells us that she is only able to talk to Que twice a week. That's okay, Dawn. I've been having a secret affair with Leonardo DiCaprio for the past two years, and we haven't been able to talk even once during that whole time. But every time I receive a hang-up phone call, I have a feeling that it's probably him. So the best part of the tour is that these two little lovebirds will get to spend lots of quality time together on a tiny, narrow, bumpy tour bus bed. And then Dawn quickly downs a glass of champagne.
Dawn asks Que what they'll do on the tour. Que says they'll cuddle, make love, have a baby, get married, move to Paris. Not necessarily in that order, of course. I mean, OF COURSE they'll save themselves for AFTER marriage! Riiiiiight, guys?! Dawn asks how all that will happen when they can't even get privacy. Que tells her that it's going to work because he loves her. Awww! I would be happy for them if I weren't too busy barfing into the waste basket right now.
Moving right along, it is the first day of the six-city tour, so it's time to pack up and load the bus. Orangebrey whines as she has far too much stuff to pack and nowhere to put it. She actually has to jump on her suitcase just to get it closed, and even then, there's still shit everywhere. And you really have to wonder, is there any person or object that this girl WON'T mount these days? All the suitcases in the world better watch out for Orangebrey and try not to drop the soap in the shower.
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Comments (10)
Last week, I had to thank you for the shirtless Wills screencap. That part can stay repetitive in your recap. ;)
I haven't actually watched this show in a long time, sooo I'm wondering...has Mike just completely given up on his weight loss program from way back when? Is he gonna join Diddy's Fit Club anytime soon? You keep mentioning how Diddy is just like that size two girl who keeps complaining she's fat. Maybe genius Diddy is trying to run a subliminal psychological mindgame on Mike...where Mike sees slim Diddy complaining about his "extra" weight and will think HE'S too fat to share the screen with Diddy and is therefore forced to lose weight so he doesn't look bad by comparison. Wait, low self-esteem isn't contagious in men like it is in women? That's what's wrong with this cruel, sexist world...
1 of 10 | Posted by blahblah | Posted on September 24, 2008 6:32 AM
Still reading...
So the interviewers ask the same three basic questions, huh? That could explain the boys' constant look of boredom. Their days probably look like this:
Morning:
Recite the SAME promo copy for DIFFERENT radio stations. Give interviews with the SAME questions to DIFFERENT interviewers.
Practice the SAME dance steps, sing the SAME lyrics, bump and grind on the SAME wall.
Afternoon:
Travel on the SAME bus with the SAME bandmates along with the SAME girl group.
Evening:
Perform the SAME routine on the SAME stage in a DIFFERENT city.
Rinse, wash, repeat.
2 of 10 | Posted by blahblah | Posted on September 24, 2008 6:41 AM
...I'm done!
Love your recaps. So funny. I know they make you wanna barf, but I think Q and Dawn's romance is very sweet. :) It's nice to see not everyone's got whoriness in their blood like Audrey (Aubry?) and Diddy.
3 of 10 | Posted by blabblah | Posted on September 24, 2008 6:51 AM
Thanks for the comments, blabblah! Just wanted to say that yeah, I think Dawn and Que are too sweet for words and super adorable. And after all that Dawn's been through, I'm really happy for her.
As for Diddy's subliminal messages, I think you might be onto something here!
4 of 10 | Posted by mandamo | Posted on September 24, 2008 7:06 AM
No, Dawn and Que are simply too much!! Maybe I'm jealous but when they come on the screen I have to cover my eyes. It makes me feel uncomfortable! LOL.
This particular episode was incredibly boring and could have been scrapped, but I still watched it.
Diddy is going to eventually make me kill myself. I'm sorry but I find him to be annoying and completely off-putting. He literally drives me insane. He's taking up more and more screen time every episode!!! (Deep breaths)
5 of 10 | Posted by MrsBojangles | Posted on September 24, 2008 9:30 AM
Diddy is HI-LARIOUS!!! He really adds humor to the show! His breaking news items are great!
I agree that Mike should join Diddy's fit club. He is just getting out of control. You would think the dancing would help him at least maintain all the hard work he did to MAKE the band, right?! Oh well.....
6 of 10 | Posted by Thatswhatshesaid | Posted on September 24, 2008 11:26 AM
Great recap MandaMo... just wanted to tell you I actually heard Day 26 on the radio the other day, and one of the hip-hop dance crews I work with is dancing to one of their songs. They just might make it after all (if they don't follow in the footsteps of Da Band, that is).
love & hugs,
xoxox
J-Mo :)
7 of 10 | Posted by J-Mo | Posted on September 24, 2008 5:43 PM
"I just want to break all the rules! Like get sloppy drunk and take a dump on the bus! RAWR!"
“Priorities, people! I mean, what are you going to do with that thing when you get it home? It's not like you can eat it or anything.”
“Sometimes this happens when a group of my friends find a chocolate pie.”
This has to be the funniest recap you’ve done for this season! I guess I will learn not to eat and read these at the same time. I’m still cleaning the keyboard.
8 of 10 | Posted by Y3KPhenom | Posted on September 25, 2008 11:56 AM
"I just want to break all the rules! Like get sloppy drunk and take a dump on the bus! RAWR!"
“Priorities, people! I mean, what are you going to do with that thing when you get it home? It's not like you can eat it or anything.”
“Sometimes this happens when a group of my friends find a chocolate pie.”
This has to be the funniest recap you’ve done for this season! I guess I will learn not to eat and read these at the same time. I’m still cleaning the keyboard.
9 of 10 | Posted by Y3KPhenom | Posted on September 25, 2008 11:56 AM
Loved the recap..great job, Mandamo
10 of 10 | Posted by georgiamama | Posted on September 29, 2008 8:58 AM