Britney Pregnant, Not Just Fat - 
by madeyoulaugh
With Child Protective Services on the verge of removing Britney and Kevin Federline’s child, the Chaotic stars have a backup plan...
On tonight’s Late Show, Britney "surprised David by confirming she is in fact preggers with baby number two," according to one audience member and TVgasm reader. It's uncertain at what point this is a big revelation on account of her bump being more visible than her next album, especially when you consider TVgasm's own m_ruv stated the obvious two weeks ago. This unfortunately will mean dedicated father Kevin will have to postpone his career for a little while longer in order to effectively raise baby number.....12? Something like that?
For me this brings up two questions.
1) How on earth is Britney Spears still getting booked on Letterman?
2) How much longer until we can get her to fade away to Spice Girl obscurity?
In other news, four horsemen have been seen riding into town on their flaming chariots.



Comments
Banish all the Cheetos, gas station restrooms, and trailer parks to Siberia and maybe her and K-Fug will follow.
Posted by: zoobabe
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May 9, 2006 5:36 PM(#1 of 27)
Time for the Baby Name pool!
Trixie?
Gladys?
Beaulah?
Or are we going Hollywood with:
Inspector Scout?
Lulabell Trafalgar?
Apple Oats?
Posted by: whawha
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May 9, 2006 5:37 PM(#2 of 27)
deja vu
this was covered on newsgasm like two weeks ago:
http://www.tvgasm.com/archives/industry/002033.php
i realize it has been a slow day on the site with very few (substantive) posts, but rehashing old news ALREADY?
Posted by: jash
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May 9, 2006 5:42 PM(#3 of 27)
jash- Dude. Take your head out of your ass and chill already. Do you drink alcohol? You should start.
Posted by: zoobabe
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May 9, 2006 5:48 PM(#4 of 27)
i'm drunk right now!
my apologies for having SOME standards on what is amusing, fresh and funny or snarky television/entertainment coverage.
let me know how the status quo is working out for you.
Posted by: jash
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May 9, 2006 5:50 PM(#5 of 27)
Jash,
I appologize, I didnt see the post that said "2 weeks from now on David Letterman, Britny Spears will make a surpsrise appearance and confirm her pregnancy"
My bad,
MYL
Posted by: Madeyoulaugh
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May 9, 2006 5:50 PM(#6 of 27)
jash (#3);
This time it's not speculation though, it's from Brit's own nasty mouth. :)
Posted by: stacyrocks
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May 9, 2006 5:50 PM(#7 of 27)
interesting stacyrocks. of course, ever the skeptic i'll wait it out a few weeks to see if there are any retractions from her like "i was so drunk y'all, i'd never do anything like thaaa, y'all i'm serious!"
MYL: aplogy accepted.
Posted by: jash
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May 9, 2006 5:54 PM(#8 of 27)
Uh oh, even People is reporting this, it must be true. It just isn't right...
Posted by: Ash
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May 9, 2006 6:24 PM(#9 of 27)
The devil must be laughing since K-Fed is apparently single handedly populating an army with his spawn.
I mean really, with all the alcohol and weed this guy consumes how is he so damn fertile????
Posted by: juxtapoeser
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May 9, 2006 6:28 PM(#10 of 27)
Poor Sean Preston.
Only 8 months old and so yesterday's news.
hb
Posted by: HoneyBunny
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May 9, 2006 6:55 PM(#11 of 27)
jash- obviously I'm a happy drunk as opposed to a bitter one like you b/c the staus quo works for me just fine. You do know that you have the option to not keep reading the recaps/commentaries here if they're so mundane -right?
Posted by: zoobabe
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May 9, 2006 7:30 PM(#12 of 27)
juxtapoeser:
The real scary thing is this...imagine if he wasn't high and drunk. The potency! Women at the bus stop would be impregnated as he drove by!
Posted by: whawha
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May 9, 2006 7:58 PM(#13 of 27)
Who was in charge of her lame entrance on Letterman? I was so let down. That could have been done sooooo much better. Is it wrong that this bothered me? Alright I am off to find a life now.
Posted by: eighme
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May 9, 2006 8:59 PM(#14 of 27)
hb-quite the wit!
Posted by: dredge
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May 9, 2006 9:28 PM(#15 of 27)
dredge - You know what flattery will get you!
hb
Posted by: HoneyBunny
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May 9, 2006 9:40 PM(#16 of 27)
So she's fallen back on her only other talent that is in her genes. Granted she couldn't sing before anyways.
Posted by: wandernview
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May 10, 2006 1:13 AM(#17 of 27)
This woman is a train wreck. There's none of the gleeful laughter of watching Tom Cruise catch the train to crazytown. She's just depressing.
Posted by: Leah3t
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May 10, 2006 6:47 AM(#18 of 27)
How does she even get into the press anymore? Ugh. I just don't get it.
Posted by: jenny10girl
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May 10, 2006 7:48 AM(#19 of 27)
So, if Sean Preston is the antichrist, what does that make this one? I guess all of the trailer manufacturers will be sending a thank you to the new parents to thank them for singlehandedly vaunting the trailer trash image...
Posted by: chick110
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May 10, 2006 12:11 PM(#20 of 27)
Local dj's were throwing this around this morning-if you had a baby and for whatever reason had to give it to one of two people to raise who would it be? The choices: K-Fed or Tom Cruise.
Posted by: tvaholic
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May 10, 2006 12:34 PM(#21 of 27)
tvaholic- now that is a fun question. I would have to give the kid to Tom. At least then the child would be physically safe.
Posted by: Leah3t
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May 10, 2006 1:09 PM(#22 of 27)
Leah3T-I'd have to agree too, at least Tom's kids all know who their daddy is! For all we know K-Fed has more running around-why is it the most stupid are the most fertile?? Although, Tom has a problem with medicine and psychology-God forbid one of his kids is bipolar, depressed, or needs something more than vitamins & exercise!
Posted by: tvaholic
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May 10, 2006 1:49 PM(#23 of 27)
But Tom would need to make sure the child had a helmet just in case he decided to do some couch jumping with the baby in arms...
I truly think it is a toss-up. Both are equally bad.
Posted by: chick110
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May 10, 2006 2:04 PM(#24 of 27)
Leah3t (#18) -- very nicely put.
Constantly hearing about ignorant white trash really is depressing, esp the tragic choices she has made and the fact that so many little girls look up to her. I was kinda appalled by Brit's first(?) video -- that whole sexy schoolgirl thing. In this day and age of rampant pedophilia and 12-year-old chicken heads (ugh), it's beyond irresponsible.
Am I right -- the Spice Girls were all about "girl power" but they weren't so blatantly trampy like Christina and Brit-nee and even Beyonce, with all that humping and slut fashion, were they? At least Pink pokes fun at girls like that and has a healthy sense of humour about it all while managing to be sexy at the same time.
God, I'm so glad I'm not (and never will be) a mother.
Posted by: Donna Martin Graduates!
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May 10, 2006 3:21 PM(#25 of 27)
Who really cares about the ongoing Jerry Springer-esque antics of this disgusting hillbilly ammoral low rent trash?
How long before these 'jumpstart my career' antics start:
-Her secret sex video hits the internet? Jenna Lewis anyone?
She poses in Playboy? Debbie Gibson anyone?
She gets divorced? Jennifer Anniston anyone?
I don't think Playboy would have her in the magazine. She looks more like a "Hustler" or "Cheri" gal these days.
KH
Posted by: KatiesHole
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May 10, 2006 4:22 PM(#26 of 27)
When is the natural selection gonna kick in and weed out the fertile k-feds of the world? Does this mean this is what we have to look forward to with the evolution of the human race? Let global warming take over cause we're SCREWED.
Posted by: brutal youth
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May 10, 2006 10:09 PM(#27 of 27)