Moments before... Malvin's black onesie covered with a white sling for an already-born-baby is OUT. Turns out pregnant women, or at least pregnant Rebecca Romijn, aren't interested in wearing around a baby sling before they actually have a baby. Nor, apparently, are they interested in dressing their wombs up like an egg and their own bodies like a chicken. Nope, sorry Malvin. America isn't ready for your brilliance. We are still the drooling masses who prefer to dress like humans and actually feel attractive while doing so. Maybe someday we'll catch up to your enlightened barnyard ways. Well surprise, surprise, Malvin's model Valerie liked his concept and doesn't think he should have lost. Is this your strategy, Valerie? Hoping your designer doesn't lose? 'Cause that's the first sensible thing I've heard yet on Models of the Runway!
Yes, here we are backstage as the models try to analyze what just happened without forcing their own heads to pop off. Valerie thinks that it's unfair that Malvin lost to Mitchell because at least Malvin can SEW, which Mitchell has proven the last two weeks he has major problems with. True, Valerie, but what's also happened the last two weeks is that some other designer has come up with something so colossally stupid that even Mitchell's messes have looked better. This week you wore it.
Malvin comes backstage wearing the sweater that some grandma must have handed him on his way "auf" the runway. He buries his head in Valerie's shoulder and wishes her luck on possibly being paired with a winning designer. Valerie boo-hoos about Malvin's sweet soul but moves on to the important hope of being chosen by a GOOD designer for the next challenge.
And as for the winning designer - Shirin, who I think looks like Penelope Cruz. Her dress was beautiful and elegant, you know, something America is ready for. She comes backstage to thank her model, Matar for successfully walking in the dress. We learn that Matar is from Israel and started modeling when she was 19. That's nice, dear. Good job wearing clothes.
Valerie takes a minute to very seriously pontificate the situation this season, wherein EVERY designer has a chance to switch models before each challenge - not just the winning designer. There's no guarantee that anyone is safe. She needs to lie down now because that's the most she's thought in years. Even dimwitted Tara pipes in that it's important to bond with your designer so they'll want to work with you. Well yes, Tara, if your designer is good. You can be friends with the likes of Ari Fish or Malvin until the cows come back to the barnyard, but it won't do you any favors. I say they just need to keep walking and hoping they get a good one. What else can they do?
It seems that Vanessa was the victim of a little overexpectation in the boob department this week. We get a glimpse of Ra'mon wondering where on earth her breasts are as he's trying to fit her into his bowling-ball-bag maternity wear. She has to bring out some cutlets to save herself and now you know how difficult and challenging it is to be a model.
Kalyn also faced a trial on the runway when Heidi asked her how she felt in Mitchell's creation which was a very tight shirt and some ill-constructed short shorts. Now, if Kalyn really wanted to endear herself to her designer and make a good impression on the other designers she could have said something like, "I think this is a fantastic idea and I love the thought of wearing a comfortable top and shorts while pregnant. It would make me feel easy and normal. I wish the shirt were not quite as tight, but I think it's a great concept and I love where it's going." See how I did that? Without saying the outfit was a masterpiece she could have given him props for his ideas and effort. Here's what she really said: "I feel like Mitchell did the best he could."
Not so great, Kalyn. You might as well have said, "Mitchell has no fingers or eyes, but given his limitations, he did the best he could." My designer is a mess and not capable of anything better.
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Comments (8)
Lifetime really missed the boat on this one -- they could easily have structured an actual challenge for the models that hooked into the PR script.
Since part of PR is that they like to throw the designers curveballs all the time, why not let the models compete so that the MODELS choose their designers?
That would at least provide a bit of suspense/justification for this wasted half-hour. We'd get to see some claws come out, that's for sure.
And it'd be cool to link the two parallel reality 'universes'.
1 of 8 | Posted by itchy | Posted on August 31, 2009 12:42 AM
I know this show is basically a wasted half hour, but I am glad to see you recapping Honey!
Itchy - a competition allowing the models to compete sounds like a great idea!
2 of 8 | Posted by Chuchu | Posted on August 31, 2009 5:36 AM
Great recap for a not-so-great show. Trying to like it but find myself fast forwarding to the elimination. Hopefully Fat Ma will attack Mitchell (is that his name? The one with no talent and really, really bad social skills?) during a fitting- running his head under the sewing machine needle or something equally gruesome and then this show will...well, have had at least one interesting thing happen!
3 of 8 | Posted by bingo blog boy | Posted on August 31, 2009 6:54 AM
Honey, they don't give you much to work with on this show, but your recaps are still awesome!
Fat Ma's 'tude really cracked me up - and she did not care that everyone saw her hissy fit. It will be interesting to see what comes of it.
Itchy - what an awesome idea! I love the thought of a real challenge or letting the modesl choose their designer - that would make this snore fest more interesting.
The only reason I watch is to get a little extra PR background - let's hope it gets more interesting in weeks to come. Thanks Honey! xoxo
4 of 8 | Posted by njgasmifan | Posted on August 31, 2009 8:18 AM
Well, the producers know how to reach me ;-D
5 of 8 | Posted by itchy | Posted on August 31, 2009 8:56 AM
I agree Itchy, and even if it was just immunity, or, if my designer doesn't want me, I get to pick one-first. It may get in the way of the designers, tho they should be able to design for anyone.
I thought Ra'mon was a contenda, but he did that awful outfit, and then he didn't pick the model he wanted, or even the one on the block--I thought she was lovely!
this show's not much, but it's short and kinda like dessert to me. I loved to see how they all despise Mitchell, with relish, and were all surprised to see him stay over Yoko Homo. They're shifting weight etc, I really enjoyed him seeing how much he sucks in their faces and body language. And, once again, why not pick the model on the block, clearly she'll take what she can get and be happy . . .
I don't think I hate Mitchell, but I do think I'll enjoy his discomfort . . . hee . . .
Thanks Honey!
6 of 8 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on August 31, 2009 1:08 PM
Do you think that Fatma is the model who refuses to wear an outfit on the runway? Maybe she hates Mitchell so much that she can't bring herself to wear his design.
7 of 8 | Posted by pixielated | Posted on August 31, 2009 10:50 PM
OMG, riDONKulous show, but your recap was sheer joolry, Honey! I love your observation on the heavy load that is modeling, I wish those girls could trade places with the rest of us for a day. You just don't have as much time to go yark up lunch when you only have a half hour to eat it in!
love, J-Mo :)
P.S. I'm scared of FatWa.
8 of 8 | Posted by J-Mo | Posted on September 1, 2009 11:41 AM