Testimonials

I take it back. Her career really has gone up.

Next up, Chris tells Adrienne to use her psychic powers to what next reality schlock is coming up next for them to gush about and for Vh1 to cross-reference. Adrienne correctly guessing...their wedding video! Darn, I thought it was going to be an extended montage of the Big Bear fight. Adrienne is so much more psychic than I am.

So we revisit clips of the wedding. "I won" she even says in the video. Chris argues there is no winner, but I think this is only what people who don't win say. There is some blah blah-ing about how despite all the struggle they really love each other. God, these people are boring when they fight and boring when they don't fight. We can't win.

And now time for the "symbolic" pressies! Gifts for both of us? she asks. You can say that, Chris says with a dirty old man har-har. Chris gives her a brand new C-cup bra. Then he gives her a little silver rattle and it looks like the least fun rattle ever. It's like stainless steel. Adrienne asks if it's a "pet rattle" (wtf?), also looks middle-aged.

The role of crying, confused Adrienne will be played by Catherine Keener.

Anyway, he gives her a nice speech about how they can have it all. That he doesn't want it to be about this or that and that he is going to trust the person with the bigger heart. (Yo, Chrissy, bigger tits doesn't mean bigger heart.) He's sorry that he gave her the impression that he was not into having children all this time. He wants her to know with absolute certainty that he wants to procreate and they'll be great parents. Life is short (for you). Adrienne is genuinely surprised by this. Now Ads wishes he hadn't waited so long because now it's a really tough decision. (A new life versus fake tits. Not an easy call.) He asks her if she wants to have kids and if she wants to have kids with him. She shakes her head no. Aw, poor Chrissy. Not even the Surreal Life and reliving past MFB seasons could make her want to be the next Scott Baio. (Vh1, cut me a check.) She even cites the anger thing as a reason to wait. At the mention of this yet again, I bang my head on the keyboard for a good five minutes.

Adrienne then does her best to change his mind that she'd be a good mom by getting into the limo afterwards and headbanging and shouting "PAAAARTY!!" seeing that Chris is sad and defeated.

Well played, girl.

Chris tells her that she's selfish and can't relate to the space that someone else is in. He just wants her to cuddle with him. But Ads is drunk, so it's time to get pissy! Right on, we haven't had a pointless fight in a while.

So Adrienne says she's going to get her shit done and Chris is just going to have to deal with it. It sounds a lot more impressive than it is. Basically all that she has to "do" is have a doctor insert some saline fun bags, but these two like to make themselves sound busier than they actually are. And next week we get to feast our eyes on the new guys! Can't wait to see all the wonderful "roles" Adrienne gets once she has engorged ta-tas. Her ticket's so punched.

Okay, Lady Sensation is out till next time. Don't forget to say good-bye to these, everyone!

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Posted in My Fair Brady by InternetSensation at 1:45 AM | Permalink | Comments (3)
Last Comment: rjfrankel on Mar 1, 2008 08:20 PM.