So Dea and Chris are scaling a full-scale child assault. She's laying it on thick. Dea thinks her daughter's smile is going to mean more to her than her messing up her body. Chris thinks that is full of wisdom. Adrienne says that in an addition a stiletto to the eye ball is full of wisdom. Indeed.
Okay. No babies.
Ads says Dea is on Chris's side because she didn't just get tits. And when we say get tits, we're talking about 14,000 smackers worth of silicon slapped into those pectoral muscles. Holy hell, I'd tell my man to back off too. Not 3, not 6, not 9, not 10. 14 GRAND!!! She's not going to fuck it up to bear the seed of his loins!! SHE WENT THROUGH HELLLLL!!!!! A child would be a waste of 14 grand. She's going to enjoy these, make some money off of them and then have babies when she's good and ready. Yes, indeed let those titties make that money back. Implants are always a high-yield investment. I asked my banker at Schwab and I'm scheduling my augmentation as we speak.
Adrienne's Thai-rade.
Dea concedes she's not going to get knocked up in a few days, but seems reluctant to concede an entire week. Ads says the doctor said she couldn't have children for 4-5 years, but I recap that this damn show and go over with the finest toothed damn comb ever and the doctor said TWO years. I should be hired to be script supervisor and jump in every time she contradicts herself or makes a dumb shit comment to correct her. Which means I would be in the scene constantly making this face.
Chris hilariously points out that by that logic, whether she waits six months or 4-5 years, it'll still be a waste of money. Foiled again, Ads! You should play more scrabble. She settles it by saying she's not talking to him anymore. But of course she keep going.
Chris and Ads fight in front of Dea said she wouldn't have gotten them if she'd have known he was going to be up in her ass everyday about having his kids. Uh, he was up her ass everyday. Dea just smiles like the polite small-town guest she is.
Let's go get clean! Ads and Dea shower together, visiting her twins, and now they're going bikini shopping for Chris and Ads's upcoming second honeymoon to Hawaii. I thought you had to earn your second honeymoon after like a decade or so of marriage, but reality stars are not subject to time and space. Ads tries on a a bunch of suits, seemingly just to see what colors set off her tits the best. She is far less interested in the bikini than her store bought jelly sacks. She calls them her "moneymakers and they've give her so much more of confidence back! She loves touching them! She feels like Pam Anderson! Really? Do tell. What's it feel like to have Hep C?
Feels hot, Lady Sensation.
After an exhausting morning of silicon admiring, it's time for a power lunch. Dea toasts to them, but Ads toast to getting knocked up for some reason, or practicing getting knocked up, she amends.
Shit. I read your cue card.
Ads says she doesn't like it when Chris makes plans for her uterus. Dea still defends Chris, and that this is the first time he's really expressed that he wants kids to her. She says their both just burnt out from working on their issues all the time. Girl, we all burnt out from them working on their issues all the time. And now we get the (genuinely) sad back story to Ads's relationship immaturity. Ads says she's going to individual counseling to deal with being molested and raped. She always says she's fine, but she knows she's not. But she and Chrissy have never discuss this, because Chris has never sat down and gone, "Details. What happened." And we learn that one of the times happened when Dea and Ads were together. Whoa! I want details. (My friend that I watched this with goes "What kind of parties were these two at??" It was funny.)
Details.
Ads knows it affects her relationship with Chris. She's not very trusting of men, and is actually scared of men. Chris calms her, except when cameras are around. When he's gone she sleeps with a bat. She even admits that she knows she's damaged. And admits that as a mother she's afraid she'd be psychotically overprotective, which more than anything is probably true.
« Big Brother: Natalie Just Needs a Good Home, Y'All | Main | Rock of Love: America's Got Talent. The Hos Just Forgot to Take a Helping »
Comments (1)
Am I the only one who feels like it's weird that these girls shower together? Although I seem to recall from season 1 or 2 that she does this with her other friends too... I mean I'm all for having self confidence in your bod but it just seems like a boundary most of us don't care to cross with our best friend.
1 of 1 | Posted by wintersux | Posted on March 6, 2008 3:28 AM