This week our spoiled brats reveal their true colors. Sebastian throws a party, PC throws a party, Camille tours Harvard with Kelli, Jessie attends a meeting about her upcoming charity event and Taylor goes to a candy store.
I suggest drinking heavily during the show. Perhaps in the spirit of youth, you'll partake in a Jaeger Bomb. Remember those days when you could do a few beers, Jaeger bombs and still go to work the next day? The alcohol will help dull the pain of watching these assholes and their posh lives.
Don't you just want to see one of them do some actual work for a minor salary and then be told they suck at it? I do.
Kudos to Bravo for getting my attention, Camille is meeting Sebastian at an art gallery. I didn't see that one coming. That's kind of like taking a pet rock to obedience classes. All it can do is lay there because, it's a rock. And much like our favorite hair flipping Sebastard, a rock has no brains. It's not like you can hope Sebastard will absorb anything from visiting an art gallery, he's not a sponge. I think he is just looking around to see if there are any visible nipples. Much to Camille's surprise, Sebastard actually touches one of the sculptures. What a guy, I just hope he doesn't spit on a painting.
Sebastard tells Camille that Kelli is not happy with him. So he tells Camille that he told her since he and Taylor are not hanging out anymore, he and Kelli should hang out. Camille is dumbfounded. She tells him that is just about the worst thing you can say to a girl. Actually if Sebastard said "I have crabs" that would be the worst thing, but this one is a close second.
Sebastard tells us that he doesn't think he should take dating advice from Camille. He asks her when is the last time you had a date? 10, 20, 30 years ago? or are you not into that? Then he says that he thinks Camille is the type of person that would make you feel dumb.
He's really stupid. All these months, all the episodes of this show and I just realized it right now, he is really stupid.
Camille fires back and says let's see, you're the guy who got dumped by Taylor and Kelli. Sebastard tells her not to go there. Why not? What's the matter Sebastard, you can't take it? I'd accuse you of dishing it out, but you didn't really do that either.
After watching this exchange, I think anyone can make Sebastard feel dumb. He is either really stupid or high or maybe both. I never noticed before how dumb he is, maybe he had me fooled with all that hair. He is not cute enough to make up for being stupid. If he's not rich, he's going to have a hard time hanging on to a girlfriend. Cute and/or rich does not make up for being stupid.
Well it's time to do the impossible. Are you ready? Jessie and Kat are trying on, wait for it......sunglasses!
Jessie is still upset that PC brought all those people (three) to the Carmen Marc Valvo event. She tells Kat that she thinks that PC needs a wake up call and says that her family has always helped save his ass!! Jessie is very upset and actually raises her voice. Between the yelling and the wonky eye she's scary.
Kat tells Jessie to just back off and let PC fail. But Jessie can't let him fail, she says she's his friend and that she's been saving his ass since the 7th grade. Kat says maybe it's time to stop, and just concentrate on trying on sunglasses. It looks like they are in the right store. See the ad below.
« America's Got Talent: There Are No Losers On AGT. Except For Seven Of The Acts. And The Viewers. | Main | More to Love: Crazy Eyes and Thunder Thighs »
Comments (7)
Annie! What a great 'cap o' snark!!!! You had me laughing hysterically at the Goonies Ray Bans and it kept going til the end. These overprivileged, underwhelming brats of the "upper klass" are amusing to watch. The bumbling dating makes me thrilled to be out of high school -- though I sincerely hope someone clues them in to the real meaning of "hooking up" before they find out the hard way. Some overzealous guidance counselor will hear of the 15 hookups a month and get Sebastard and his tardettes in for a full herp, hep, hiv screening!
1 of 7 | Posted by FancyPants | Posted on August 10, 2009 6:20 AM
I just had to agree with whoever pointed out last week. That most of these "kids" are physically unattractive or just plain weird looking. Jesse has the most distracting teeth in the world. On another blog someone put it that she has the face of a thirty year old with baby teeth. I am not sure if it the WASP inbreeding from previous generations or what. But these darn kids, for the most part, with the exception of Taylor and PC are just strange looking.
2 of 7 | Posted by reckless_saturn_11 | Posted on August 10, 2009 12:32 PM
Dear FancyPants and reckless_saturn_11:
Fancy: Thank you for the love. I've been trying so hard to get my snark going and I think I finally succeeded.
I agree with you about the definition of "hook-ups". I don't think the kids really know what it means and if they do then they should get in to see their Dr.'s immediately.
Saturn: These kids are all a bit odd looking. Kelli, Taylor and Camille all with that long dark hair and you're right, taylor definitely has the looks. As for Jessie, it's unfortunate that her personality shows on her face so much. I really believe that beauty starts on the inside and we all know she is pretty messed up.
I also don't think Sebastian is as cute as he thinks he is. I mean the hair is just annoying and his manner of speech reminds me of Spicolli in Fast Times at Ridgemont High. Except Spicolli was smarter.
I hope tonights episode is at least a little explosive. Bravo likes to lead us on and follow up with a big dud of a show.
Thanks for reading and commenting.
TVannie
3 of 7 | Posted by AnneM | Posted on August 11, 2009 3:40 PM
During every episode I was always spacing off, trying to think of who jessie looks like, and omg -- as soon as I saw the "Everyone keeps asking me to model" pic, it hit me...she's garth from wayne's world. great recaps. so glad this trainwreck is over.
4 of 7 | Posted by shoes23 | Posted on August 11, 2009 7:38 PM
It feels like the wonky eye jokes should get old, but they never do! I'm very happy about that, I laugh everytime.
And let me just stress how much I love PC: I love him a lot. I don't even know why, I just want to hang out with him.
That being said, PC and Taylor seem like the only two on this show that I can stand. Jessie sometimes, but when she gets all mad and yells, it feels a little awkward.
5 of 7 | Posted by kelsey | Posted on August 12, 2009 6:02 PM
Dear Shoes23 and kelsey,
Shoes23- that is awesome!! Party on Garth is totally Jessie. I love that comparison, when I told my husband what you said he laughed so hard he was crying. That Jessie is going to have a hard time being taken seriously if she doesn't figure out a better look for herself. I mean, would you let her style your clothes? Maybe ripped leggings and saggy knit hats and high boots are fashion forward, but not where I live.
kelsey- the wonky eye jokes just never end on this show. I just couldn't help it when she was shopping for sunglasses, I felt like she was just asking for it.
I think Taylor and PC are probably the easiest to talk to on this show. Kelli isn't bad but she is so nervous and jittery, it would be too distracting.
Thank you everyone for reading my recaps. I love to entertain and I hope that you've all been entertained each week.
TVannie
6 of 7 | Posted by AnneM | Posted on August 12, 2009 7:11 PM
boring show.....boring recaps.....thankfully it's all over.....
7 of 7 | Posted by Anonymous | Posted on August 13, 2009 11:40 AM