James inexplicably then says that he doesn't know what RC wanted him to do. Is RC like his personal Jesus?
Yeah, that's right. Jesus was black, fool.
I don't get it. Maybe he should have done it, but (beat) "I wasn't gonna take myself out. I wanted Grimace gone". Finally James says something with candor and I appreciate it and like him for saying he wouldn't have done that.
The OGs have a beachside lunch and Scorp gives a corny toast.
I just can't raise my arm that high anymore, dude.
Zach and the ladies lunch at this little cabana called "El Canario". (Someone goes "Ooooh, it says 'el'" and then trails off because Canario is a way complex thing to pronounce.) Afterwards the group gets a note from some waiter that's not the Sexy Messener and it just feels weird.
He gets to pick a lady to stay with there for the night. This kinda bombshell would have maybe been exciting three weeks ago, because really now, who is he going to pick? TD? Biscuit? Please. After a pause to figure out if there's any way he could make a dramatic decision that wouldn't ultimately result in complete boredom for him, he chooses Biggie, who is all pre-coital smiles. Biscuit and TD just smile knowingly and leave happily.
Let me put on my pig nose face for thinking better.
The OGs get back first and are shocked to find no one there! They think that something shocking has happened and speculate. Orbi and Scorp laugh at how paranoid James must be.
Over in Zach and Biggie's beach hideaway, they talk about the OGs. Biggie thinks Scorp is a stand-up guy, but that she was completely fooled by Orbi. She says that she hears everything and that he plays the game HARD.
Oh, Biggie. We like it when you talk dirty.
When you talk like that, babe, it gives me a nipple hard-on.
TD and Bisky are finally back and they too are expecting something dramatic to be waiting for them. They join Orbi and Scorp and no one can believe that nothing cray cray is going down. TD says that something weird is going on. She can feel it. Girl, nothing is going on. I can promise you.
And now it's time for the much ballyhooed fight between Zach and Biggie. It's starts over nothing. Biggie points out that there's a camera in the room and when Zach says that he doesn't want to have sex on camera, Biggie says that's fine, she's tired anyway.
But, didn't you get the point? He's not like ORBI, he's not a porn guy. He's already had sex with Amy and now her last night and he can't be seen as a PORN GUY. But she must be okay with it because she did it with Orbi. The undercurrent seems to be that he's annoyed she had sex with Orbi, but he deftly makes the argument about her not listening and her not caring that his reputation is somehow being damaged by having sex while on the reality show paradise hotel. Biggie says that even when they agree it feels like they argue. It ends with her crying and Zach telling her to stop. She does, but refuses to look at him. Maybe Zach's a scorpio, too.
Here's my interpretation:
Hey, there's a camera. Let's do it!
I already did that with Amy. People are gonna think I'm a porn star. And then it's impossible to cross over into real acting.
See? The camera is zooming in on my package. They think I'm a porn guy!
Why are we fighting, Zachie Poo? How can we not get along when we both like horizontal stripes on our asses. HOW?!?
No. I will never stop calling you Amy.
End scene.
Next day "the lovebirds" return and exchange stories with rest of the posse and Biggie brings up the fight to the TD and Biscuit. They are both genuinely surprised. She doesn't go into details, chalking it up to a stupid disagreement, but admits that she feels weird now.
What's your damage, brah? Why so uptight about doing her on cam?
Orbi does have the mustache though. It makes sense.
Zach tells the camera that they had a little argument about the situation they had (i.e. cameras), but that the real issue is that he doesn't like rushing into things. For people to fall for each other it takes time. Zach's psychological badgering is all just because he is a romantic. It's okay then.
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Comments (5)
well, i am also watching this show for some reason. td still annoys me beyond belief. she talks so slow and her lip gloss is always on the outside of her lips. also, i cant believe u didnt comment on zach's tighty whitey's in the last scene!! who wears tighty whiteys!?
biscuit annoys me when she talks about people playing the game! isnt that what they r there for? some people are just playing harder than others...im wanting mike to win the whole thing.
1 of 5 | Posted by yankeesfan | Posted on May 9, 2008 4:59 PM
I am watching the show too for some reason as well. I miss some of the ones who are not there anymore, and the ones who remain, I could care less about. I will finish though, and I do hope Mike wins as well.
2 of 5 | Posted by Fourteen Forty | Posted on May 9, 2008 8:00 PM
I only started watching this one because of the hype over the first season. I can't believe how much this show sucks ass.
You can almost sense the producers' desperation here. Wishing something, anything would happen with this gang of total losers.
I mean, maybe they were hoping Droopy would have her first sex on the show?
Nothing can save this trainwreck. Except the recaps, which are more fun than the actual show.
"Ultimate Prize" indeed. No doubt they were waiting to see if they made any money with this dog --and adjust the 'prize' accordingly.
Ugh.
3 of 5 | Posted by itchy | Posted on May 10, 2008 11:29 PM
gang. thanks for sticking with!
i for one am sad that this has been such a disappointing go. i remember i *lived* for the first season. it makes a difference when there are contestants you can get behind. there is absolutely no one i care about this season, and it just makes everything tedious and grating on my nerves. at least i can channel my frustration through mocking recaps.
and yankeesfan, i DID have a comment on the tighty whiteys. i think i changed it at the last minute and forgot to add a note on it elsewhere. total missed opportunity indeed. i was SHOCKED zach had those on, and then that mr. modesty would show them off sprawling on top of the sheets. those two are killing me. bring amy back, i say!
love y'all!
xoxolady s.
4 of 5 | Posted by theinternetsensation | Posted on May 11, 2008 9:38 AM
internetsensation, I bow to you. Your recaps are hilarious. You always capture the true intentions of these goofballs and articulate them in ways my mind is just not capable of. I hope next season gives you better ho's and bro's to work with, Dude (that was for James). Thanks for all the laughs.
5 of 5 | Posted by susana456 | Posted on May 12, 2008 6:56 AM