This is from TVguide.com Soaps News, May 26. Exact quote: “NBC has officially renewed the camptastic supernatural sudser for an eighth season. This means Passions is confirmed to stay on the air at least through July 2007!… The bad news is that NBC required Passions to do some serious financial belt-tightening in order to stay afloat for a Season 8. Sources tell TVGuide.com that the soap had to slash its budget by as much as $5 million….”

Oh my goodness. I guess we had better enjoy the fake-outdoors, fake-beach, and fake-Rome sets while we have them, because soon there will just be one big set with different painted backdrops, like a high-school play. As for the acting talent, they could switch to an all-“Will Work For Food” cast without any appreciable decline in quality, so I’m not too worried about that.

I had a DVR malfunction this week, so I am doing this from memory, and I’m going to talk about the whole week instead of focusing on Friday. A huge thank you to www.all4passions.com for many of the screencaps.

I’m sorry, you and your sister did what?

Let me start with a recap of perhaps my favorite Passions conversation ever – and that’s saying a lot. This happened on Tuesday, when Chad was, as usual, searching for Whitney in the Vatican. Chad ran into a friendly young monk (apparently, a pre-existing friend of his), and they had the following conversation, which I am trying to quote as closely as I can:

CHAD: Hey, do you think you can help me? My friend is lost in the catacombs.

FRIENDLY YOUNG MONK: Why sure, I’d love to help. You seem to care about your friend very much.

CHAD: Well, actually, she’s the mother of my baby, and I love her more than anything.

FYM: I can see that you do. Why don’t you do the right thing and marry her?

CHAD: Well, I really want to. I really wish I could. But I can’t.

FYM: Why not?

CHAD: Because she’s my half-sister.

[LONG, AWKWARD SILENCE]

FYM: Uh…. Ooooookay. Well, I can still help you look for her.

CHAD: Great! We didn’t know we were brother and sister when we conceived our son. But now that we know, I still love her.

FYM: You mean, you love her as a sister now, right?

CHAD: Oh, no. I’m still totally in love with her.

[LONG, AWKWARD SILENCE]

FYM: Uh…. Ooooookay.

So there you have it, kids. Your Passions public-service announcement for the week. Love your siblings! Awesome.