Third, the mask does not have hair. So there would have been seams not only along the neck, but also along the whole hairline of the dude wearing it.
And fourth, in related news, the whole team of doctors and nurses at this convalescent home never even noticed that their coma patient had his face covered by a rubber mask! Which did not even include hair, and was perfectly visible to the eye of the first lay person who looked for it! Now, that is some truly discerning medical care right there. Even the lovely Dr. Eve was taken in by this. I now realize that I gave the show too much credit with my prior assumption that the coma guy would turn out to have received plastic surgery to look like Alistair. Nope – sorry, we don’t even have the budget for *imaginary* plastic surgery these days.
Of course, now that Sheridan knows that Alistair is not in the nursing home, she is able to deduce that he just might be in Rome. But so far, she hasn’t been able to get up with Luis to tell him this, so nobody in Rome knows it yet.
Okay – I have saved the mermaid story for last. When we last saw our little Siren, she was suspended in a net, with Kay, Fox, Miguel, Gorton, and the photographer all agape (geddit?) at the sight of her very cheap-looking fabric tail.
Siren flipped out and escaped into the ocean. Miguel swam after her. Kay got really worried about him, but they both came back safe and sound, and Siren had legs again.
Siren then convinced everyone that they didn’t see what they thought they saw. You see, she argued, the tail was just a really creative idea she had for the photo shoot. It was just a costume she brought from home. Yup, and for some reason, she wasn’t wearing it when she fell into the water, and she *was* wearing it when they rescued her with the net!
Of course, all of the men believed this, but Kay totally didn’t. She was on a mission to find out the truth, and she confronted Tabitha. Finally she got Tabitha to admit to the whole thing – Siren is a mermaid; Endora conjured her up one night to save Miguel from drowning; then Endora gave her legs so she could be paired up with Miguel.
At first, Kay found this totally hilarious. This person she thought was her romantic rival was actually, as she put it, a fish! She rattled off all the clues she should have seen. Yes, Kay, that’s right. You should totally have known that this girl was actually a mermaid. Where was your head?
But Tabitha put an end to Kay’s merriment when she told her the truth about mermaids. Once a man has sex with a mermaid, she will dump him and break his heart, and he will pine away for her for the rest of his life. And he will never be able to have sex with a human woman again.
Well, Kay is absolutely not okay with this, since it’s on her agenda to sex up Miguel herself. She goes looking for Miguel, but – uh-oh – he’s off someplace ALONE with Siren. And yes, they are totally making out on the beach, and they’re about to Do It. And then her tail grows back. What the? Won’t this make it hard for them to…. Um, you know what, I don’t want to think about it.
I’m … speechless.
I have to digress here for a moment to express some sympathy for Miguel. For the first several years of this show, one of the main plots was that Tabitha had to make sure that Miguel never had sex with Charity, because then good would triumph over evil and Tabitha would lose her powers. And now, one of the main plots is that Kay has to make sure that Miguel never has sex with Siren. This poor guy is not getting any, and it’s through no real fault of his own.
Blast from the past: Miguel and Charity. (Yes, the old Miguel was John from Desperate Housewives, for anyone who didn’t know.)
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Comments (9)
All I can think of is the mermaid episode of Futurama...
"Why couldn't she be the kind of mermaid with the girl part on the BOTTOM!?"
1 of 9 | Posted by stm007
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Posted on June 12, 2006 11:54 AM
The "sand" on the "beach" looks like fill dirt. What happened to Charity? It cannot be possible for this show to look cheaper.
2 of 9 | Posted by Vidle
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Posted on June 12, 2006 1:00 PM
Couldn't the Three Dunceketeers have snuck into the MASKED BALL by, I don't know, PUTTING ON MASKS??
3 of 9 | Posted by mandymax
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Posted on June 12, 2006 1:37 PM
I wish you could find a picture of Teresa making that long jump between planks in the ruins. I had a burst of laughter when I saw that. And when she tipped over after she barely made the jump.
I'm surprised that there was $5 million at all in their budget. I really believe that the writers think of this show as a joke. No writer can be serious and write this stuff.... Unless it's a Walker, Texas Ranger writer.
4 of 9 | Posted by tikilights
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Posted on June 12, 2006 3:18 PM
Miguel must have a stick of dynamite in his pants, if he's going to penetrate that fish tail.
I love when Sheridope talks to herself. She's an imbecile, and its a riot to watch.
The whole virtual reality story makes no sense. Whitney and bad monk big Al just walked right into the Pope's chambers. They didn't have to do a thing. Whitney had that dumb headset on for weeks.
I look forward to the lower budget shows. Will be interesting. I think it will be cancelled soon, ratings are way low.
For a nun with a limp and a hunchback, she sure gets around fast.
KH
5 of 9 | Posted by KatiesHole
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Posted on June 12, 2006 4:21 PM
I'm so tired of the Monk and Mermaid storyline, it's so boring and makes little sense. I love all the cooky stuff that happens on Passions but this is just boring!
I was wondering the same thing about the art gallery and the masked ball. Why? lol
6 of 9 | Posted by Duchovnysfan
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Posted on June 12, 2006 4:55 PM
Haha, I don't watch Passions, but that's funny.
7 of 9 | Posted by Kathryn
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Posted on June 12, 2006 7:24 PM
8 of 9 | Posted by Ubiquitous
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Posted on June 14, 2006 10:10 AM
Love your posts. I can't wait until the the budget-reduced shows begin airing. Normally a serious reduction in budget would hurt a show but I sincerely believe that in the case of Passions this will prove to be a creative boon. Can you imagine the crap they will come up with on an even more shoe-string budget? Comedy gold!
9 of 9 | Posted by bdos88
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Posted on June 18, 2006 6:35 PM