Elisa's work is up next. It doesn't have a poop train and if she wins this thing, her ensemble is really gonna take the slutty art teacher demographic by storm. The cape comes off and the dress underneath is surprisingly really pretty and competent. Who knew?
Rami tries to show that he was going for pregnant socialite Karate student instead of Japanese Restaurant waitress by adding a humongous snake skin diaper bag as an accessory. He and Kit produced extremely similar looks, down to the same color and same leggings. I can't help but wonder what they would have produced had Sarah Jessica worn buttless chaps to their initial meeting. Ditto much?
Marion and Steven did a bit of tailoring and the result was less post Nutrisystem Stevie Knicks and more Pocahontas starring in Casino Morongo's production of Flashdance. I hate to say it, but it's kinda hideous.
Victorya's formless wonder is (I know, I'm a hypocrite) actually one of my favorites. I think Nina Garcia likes it too, because she gives it her contemplative disgusted look, which is different from just plain disgusted. Seriously, the woman is in the fashion industry and no one's told her about Botox? Come on, Kors, you have a duty.
Christian's jacket is well made and pretty cool, but when his model takes it off, I have to pause the TV and relish this moment. Christian has made a model look like a fat piggy. It's like Christmas on Thanksgiving. Last and pretty much least, Ricky's flowy dress is done and booooring, but I like the chola hair he put on his model.
Heidi calls out Ricky, Jack, Kit Pistol and Chris in the middle and excuses them from the runway. Sarah Jessica loves Victorya's dress, saying it's simple but still interesting. Marion isn't so lucky. Nina makes them take the belt off the model and calls out the bad proportioning. Kors says the look is Pocahontas (thank you very much), but SJP is kinder. She thought the sketch was really sophisticated, but the final result didn't quite reflect it.
Heidi is plain evil. She doesn't get it. "At all. It looks like out of da basement, it looks dirty, it looks like a rag to me." Alrighty then, sauerkraut. Speak your mind. Marion looks like he is going to have a nervous breakdown, but then again, that's how he always looks so it's hard to tell how he takes this critique. I have to add that he is wearing a jacket I just saw on the rack at Forever 21. I hope they don't take points off for that. I like him.
SJP loves Elisa's dress. She asks how the partnership went down, and Sweet P says Elisa's a freak who speaks a different language. Elisa defends herself by saying poly-morphic again and then talks about spit marking her clothes. Heidi tells her she shouldn't tell people that because most women would feel uncomfortable knowing their dress was spit on. Then she asks her what planet she's from, to which Elisa responds "the planet I am from is trained to respond to materials and doesn't necessarily know the language but knows how to make it work on the body and so I'm coming to your planet, but with gifts." Wow. Elisa is the first recap victim I have ever encountered that only needs an exact transcription for maximum entertainment. I am happy as pie that she'll be around for another week.
The look on Christian's face as he realizes he was not kept on the runway to accept a job at Bitten is sad and hilarious. Kors and Nina think the jacket is too snug to be widely accessible and the whole look is too eighties. Huh? How many goddamn pair of leggings just walked the runway? I call bullshit. So does Christian. He snaps at the Judges and says he'd like to hear SJP diss his fantasticness, since his end product is just like the sketch. She understandably looks scared as she says the outfit is more severe in person and she'd like it if the color was different and it wasn't so tight. Christian looks like he's about to short circuit.
Heidi asks Carmen who should go home from her team and she starts sobbing. "You're making me choose?!?" No, God Complex, it's a hypothetical. Christian gives her permission to say he should go since it was his design and she squeezes out some salt as she chokes "him." Goodness gracious, drama mama. Her earrings still dangle violently, but in a very tragic, overstated way.
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Comments (16)
Man this show is great. I'm so glad crazyface is still there. Kinda sad to see sad squiggy leave though. Poor thing.
Love the recap!
1 of 16 | Posted by CheriesTake | Posted on November 25, 2007 3:36 PM
LOL...sad squiggy!
Flipit, Thanks for the good laugh. I laughed out loud so often that my husband thought I was losing my mind.
What a great writer you are...really special around here. Salute.
2 of 16 | Posted by moxy | Posted on November 25, 2007 5:47 PM
flipit I've been reading your recaps since your first one, they are all great. I finally had to tell you that:) thanks for entertainig us!!
3 of 16 | Posted by justina | Posted on November 25, 2007 5:59 PM
Oh my. In preparation for Thanksgiving festivities, I (accidentally?) hurled myself down a flight of stairs & now it literally hurts to laugh. D*mn you, Flipit! It hurts!
4 of 16 | Posted by Lime23 | Posted on November 25, 2007 7:12 PM
Loved your FIDDLER screencap. I laughed out loud.
Also, I think that Nina Garcia might have been pregnant or nursing when this was filmed. Maybe that's why she shows no signs of the botox.
5 of 16 | Posted by ReeseWitherspoon | Posted on November 25, 2007 9:32 PM
I love reading the recaps, so I finally registered because I have to share what I know... regarding the be-hatted crying Ricky, I have worked with him. He conveniently left out all of his career experience when he vaguely interviewed, "I came to NY to dance, and well... I ended up with my own lingerie collection". He did not mention the years of working for other people, designing a licensed collection, and walking off that job literally an hour before he was fired. Another big scandal ensued at his next company, and I heard he was threatened with a giant lawsuit for certain conduct at that job. He showed his collection at a trade show, received small orders, and promptly went out of business. The next I heard of him, he resurfaced on this show! I have to wonder if the Bravo producers did any sort of background check on the people they choose to have on the show... beyond the mess that is his career, he is a nasty spiteful person with horrible taste- both these facts were the reason he was about to be canned before he walked off that first job I mentioned (with no notice- very classy). I told several coworkers that he's on the show, and were so thrilled he was in the bottom three the first episode! One more thing- those are purely crocodile tears being squeezed out for the camera.
6 of 16 | Posted by vivalasvegas | Posted on November 26, 2007 4:53 AM
you're not allowed to use botox when you're preggers? that's when you need it most! like wine. lame.
lime, feel better! i hurled myself down the stairs on purpose this tday. wah me. thanks so much for commenting guys. and thanks for the gossip, viva! i can't wait to see little ricky craaaaaack. what a dope. LOVE
7 of 16 | Posted by flipit | Posted on November 26, 2007 8:55 AM
Hey Flippy!!!! So nice to start my return to work with your refreshing dish! I wasn't hating on Ricky . . . but now . . . well, I think I'm buying what you're selling flipit--withdrawing . . . I know I weep my ass off when I'm out of clean needles--and forget that spoon burning shit . . . I need ready to shoot!!!
Very ho-hum fashion this week, for me, I was confronted at the water cooler and I had to squeeze my little brain to remember anything, other than top 2 and last. Are capes in!? I thought leggings were a fashion don't . . . they certainly are in my world! (unless accompanied by fishnets!)
Something about that Steven guy was bugging me . . . next to go!?
8 of 16 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on November 26, 2007 12:05 PM
"No, God Complex, it's a hypothetical. Christian gives her permission to say he should go since it was his design and she squeezes out some salt as she chokes "him."
I started coughing I laughed so hard at that. My little sister and I are sooo on the same page. I looked at her and she said "Jeez calm down, she's asking who you want to go home not the gas chamber."
9 of 16 | Posted by PixieGal262 | Posted on November 26, 2007 11:59 PM
Great recap!!
I learned two new things from this episode. 1. Steven might be a serial killer. Or Art Garfunkel's cousin. 2. Sarah Jessica Parker has far less fashion sense than most people give her credit for.
10 of 16 | Posted by memememe | Posted on November 27, 2007 9:46 AM
so I went to S&B to buy the winner dress and vest (not to wear together, me being in the Midwest, we don't typically mix and match like that). Anyhoo - the dress is there in plum and black - v cute. But, it is SO shorty - would definitely need pants for fear of showing your Britney. And, without the vest, it is very shapeless - so I sort of looked like I had the shape of a purple pumpking. With the vest on, it was much more flattering. The jury is still out on if I would purchase, but thought I would give you my 2 cents...
11 of 16 | Posted by cfab | Posted on November 27, 2007 1:56 PM
Flip, excellent recap!
12 of 16 | Posted by slutty_whore
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Posted on November 27, 2007 4:53 PM
Steven's nickname should be Slingblade.
13 of 16 | Posted by dojean | Posted on November 28, 2007 3:50 PM
This recap was truely excellent. I spit out a peice of cake when I read the Elisa cootchie licking bit.
I want to add some other factoids though. Steven does have a super crazy way of speaking, but he's no Slingblade. As someone who's dated him he's totally hot in real life, and probably much better looking than anyone who is sitting around home so much that the think using "Slingblade"as a pejorative is still a viable as comedy. Also Steven works at a museum, but one hastens to add, he's a secretary at that museum- not an exhibit maker. Word to your mother!
14 of 16 | Posted by jazzhandstheworld | Posted on November 29, 2007 2:34 PM
Steven and Jazzhands sittin in a tree...:)
15 of 16 | Posted by flipit | Posted on November 29, 2007 4:21 PM
Jazzhands-
Yeah, you're right. It was a stupid comment and a dated reference at that. Just a note of caution, though: if there is anything tougher than the world of reality television, it's the blogs about reality television. Much tougher than what you've probably run into while dating museum secretaries. Be prepared for your ex and his fellow contestants to be savaged weekly. First by each other and next by the blog commentators. The judges remarks will be the least painful things they hear each day. Have fun.
16 of 16 | Posted by jeanhyclak | Posted on November 29, 2007 4:54 PM