Christian was originally looking for dark skinned models in his casting and didn't get many, so he comes up with the idea of putting his models in blackface. Collier's like, uh, how bout some bright lipstick instead? DEAL! Jillian wants "natural but dramatic", so Collier puts some eyeliner on a fifteen year old and says the drama will come from the whole running away from home to sell your body to fashion thing that the teen girl's got goin' on. Collier Strong's job is a bitch, and he has some really homely girls to deal with this season.
How bout I just try and make your model look less like the guy from Mask while you sit quietly in a corner, umkay?
As the models arrive for fittings, Rami takes time out of his busy day to tell us that all of Christian's work is over the top and he has a lot to learn about this industry regarding making clothes that actual women would wear. Everyone knows that a dress is basically just a huge sack that you pin and stretch and put belts on so you can look ten pounds overweight everywhere you go. Duh.
Christian puts his models in the tallest shoes Bluefly sells, and the prettiest model bitches about them. He says that he walked around his closet apartment for a week in those shoes and if he can do it, so can she. LOL. Then he tells her to concentrate on being skinny and not eating. LOLx2. Slowly but surely, he's coming back.
So is Jillian! Across the room, she's starting to go into drama mode because her models look so different from one another. Oh no! What the hell kind of bots are these? She whisper yells into the phone to get newer, skinnier Russian models shipped in ASAP. Oh come on. Just let the fug voices sing with the rest of the only slightly homely chorus.
She doesn't shut up about it and tries to get the agency to send over more girls. They tell her oh hell no so she just whisper whines until Rami asks her if she can focus on the positive. She says no and then starts poking her fingers with needles and crying. Welcome back, Kotter.
Wahwahwahwahwahhhhhhhh. Don't worry. The height differences might deflect attention from the mop sleeves on that t-shirt.
The night before the runway show, Tim comes in to give the final three his "you're the best designers this show has ever had EVAH EVAH EVAH!" spiel. Yeah yeah, we've heard it. All I can say is these people are no Angela. Before he leaves he kisses them all but they avoid his lips cuz of that herp he was sporting last time they saw him.
Hulleow? What about me?
The next morning, Christian, Rami and Jillian arrive at Bryant Park and Rami gets all deep. "It's sort of like standing directly in front of the heart beat that pumps the blood into the fashion industry." I would like this guy so much more if he just didn't talk. Could you get out of the way, please? You're standing in front of my heartbeat.
Last minute touches are made and of course there are models missing. What is it with models? You gotta roll outta bed and walk around. What's so hard about that? Don't tell me you're late cuz you were at breakfast, cuz that shit don't fly. I wonder what the final model's damage is until I catch the look on her face. Bitch was lost.
What's the square root of four?
You know it's almost show time because HUGE stars start filling the tent. Julia Roberts, Anthony Hopkins, Beyonce, Shirley Bassey, Daniel Day Lewis, Elmo....wait. No, sorry, my bad. It's just a bunch of people from Bravo shows. The biggest news is that Baldhawk from Top Chef is still dating the guy who left this season cuz he got a staph infection. How I didn't read all about that on Page Six is beyond me. Is no one paying attention? Baldhawk's a celeb, people! Respect!
So, are you two in l...ooh look it's a line producer from Millionaire Matchmaker! Sorry can we continue this later?
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Comments (17)
CHRISTIAN IS AMAZING! i want to be his best friend
1 of 17 | Posted by preppyboy | Posted on March 6, 2008 6:15 PM
Did you see that one of Jillian's models was Yentl? YAY!
2 of 17 | Posted by monina79 | Posted on March 6, 2008 6:35 PM
I am pretty sure that one of Jillian's models was Jaslene from America's Next Top Model. I was glad that Christian won, but where did those feather pants go? I guess he listened to Tim on that one. I really liked Rami's outfits, the weaving was awesome, the colors did suck though and Jillian's line I didn't like at all. So it was between Rami and Christian for me. And when Christian won, I cryed a little too!!
3 of 17 | Posted by featherhead | Posted on March 7, 2008 4:00 AM
Thanks for the recap. I enjoy your spin on the show (not to mention your clever and funny choice of words). The day before the Finale, there weren't many routing for Christian, but I see the wagon is FULL!! I have watched all 4 seasons and truly believe the talent (as a group) was the best. In addition, there was a lot more personality with this bunch. I hate the season is over and hope Christian doesn't fall into a black hole like other winners. Again, congratulations, Christian with your FIERCE A#$!!!
4 of 17 | Posted by mspattie | Posted on March 7, 2008 4:58 AM
Awesome recap, Flipit! I LOLed at several points.
Did anyone fear that they were going to give it to Rami?? Ack. I was all ready to throw things & scream at the TV. Thank G*d. Now Christian can upgrade from a closet to a pantry, maybe.
In the end -- seeing it live (although I only watched it once), I really kind of liked Jillian's collection. She should have come in 2nd. I don't care what Jessica Alba says.
:) Love, Lime
P.S. We did tell you about Baldhawk, my man.
5 of 17 | Posted by Lime23 | Posted on March 7, 2008 5:48 AM
Lime23 - I also thought they were going to give it to Rami. When Christian's lip was quivering at the end it was so cute. I just wanted to give him a hug. I thought it was nice that he got nervous and tongue tied. I did think his final collection was repetitive of what he did all season, but I still think he deserved to win. I also think he was really lucky that Posh was the guest judge. I want to be friends with Christian!!
6 of 17 | Posted by yankeesfan | Posted on March 7, 2008 8:10 AM
FYI...Christian's ink is a squid and has been there the entire season. It's perhaps more apparent due to his shrunken hair. Do you suppose he gave his extra hair to Chris???
7 of 17 | Posted by busterdog | Posted on March 7, 2008 9:20 AM
Christian wasn't my personal pick, but when I saw him living and working in that little cubbyhole, my heart went out to him, and I cheered him at the end. I am wondering about the squid, though -- is there some deep symbolism there, or was he just drunk?
8 of 17 | Posted by FreeSpirit | Posted on March 7, 2008 9:32 AM
OH Flipit...you are the best. I loved the recap...it was FIERCE...LOL
Christian so deserved to win. Until next season...
9 of 17 | Posted by Rvrctylady | Posted on March 7, 2008 10:19 AM
I love love loved this season. And I'm so happy Christian won. I did think they would give it to Rami and was screaming "nooo" at my tv. Thank god that didn't happen.
I think Christian is bound to be huge. He has amazing talent for being only 21 and has many many years ahead of him to perfect his style.
10 of 17 | Posted by pixi-stix | Posted on March 7, 2008 11:47 AM
okay, I totally think Jillian and Rami were hooking up during the show. Anyone else with me?
I guess I'm glad Christian won...he really was uber-annoying, and he kinda made the same thing over and over, but he is talented.
and yes, featherhead, that WAS Jaslene.
11 of 17 | Posted by fycin | Posted on March 7, 2008 12:40 PM
I still think Chris would have won if he'd been in the top 3, but I'm glad it went to Christian, esp coz of the cubby hole apt! Didn't look like Jillian or Rami were hurting for cash . . . . and fycin--silly, Rami's gay like me, I don't think he was anything with Jillian but annoyed.
Christian will be the first winner hawking products that I might enjoy seeing . . .
With that smug little smile on Rami's face, I totally thought he was with me and some of you thinking he had the win. As I said earlier, I saw some misses in those collections, esp the riding pants lines. I also thought all the feather stuff was completely redonk! I was howling at them when I saw the stills, just goes to show what I know about fashion . . .
Over all, I had a majah good time with these recaps and all the comments!!!! Take care all, and maybe I'll see ya on the top chef caps!!!!
12 of 17 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on March 7, 2008 4:18 PM
juddfan -- really? I thought at first he was gay too but there just seemed to be something else going on.... oh well, what do I know, maybe the accent threw me.
13 of 17 | Posted by fycin | Posted on March 7, 2008 7:01 PM
Just had to say goodbye Flipit. You are seriously funny and deserve to have your blogs turned in to a feature film just like Diablo Cody. Fingers crossed.
I'm glad Christian won, I guess. He is quite entertaining but a little bit sad. Like the strange boy everyone made fun of in high school and decides to just "fuck them all!" and become uber-queenie and mean- like "Mean Girls"! But God love him and I give him props for continuing to walk to the walk (literally- fierce!) and pursuing his dream.
Posh Spice is just bizarre looking. She doesn't smile because the entire top half of her face is frozen and if she moves too much all of the fill and implants will shift- no roller coasters for this girl, please! If you want some good Posh Spice bashing, watch any of the variety shows on BBC America. They hate her and it's funny. And a bit sad.
14 of 17 | Posted by bingo blog boy | Posted on March 8, 2008 7:17 AM
I was so glad that Christian won, the the effect that I was smiling the entire next day and still am!
He deserved to win, and is a prodigy. Plus, with all of his "fierce" and "fabulous", he seemed really genuine this last epi, and seems very grateful for the win in the post interviews!
Can't wait to see his collection in the fall!
15 of 17 | Posted by fnllover | Posted on March 10, 2008 11:22 AM
Hope it's not too crushing fycin, but yeah, he's a sister. Maybe Flip and I will do a secret mission to his studio, I heard on the pod cast it's near his house, so next time I go stalking, I'll knock . . . just kidding!!! I think somewhere it was even said he had a lover. And for the record, I only stalk Flip it here by reading and worshiping all his recaps! See ya on the 'gasm guys!
16 of 17 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on March 10, 2008 1:08 PM
Hello to all. Did anyone see Christian on Ellen yesterday? He was his usual FIERCE self and indicated he already made a couple of outfits for Mrs Beckham. He also gave Ellen a sketch of a design (pants, of course) he made for her. She assured him if he made it, she would wear it. He said he was going to spend his money on a new collection for next year's Fashion Week. Let me know if anyone saw the show.
17 of 17 | Posted by mspattie | Posted on March 12, 2008 8:47 AM