They will be designing for each other, but they have to design within the guidelines of a certain musical genre. Kenley is pop and Pleather is punk, which really puts CutToe in a good mood.
She's country, Squirc is hip hop, and Hobosexi is rock. Uh, where's musical theater? This is the gayest show in history (although Top Design's nipping at its heels) and no Broadway? SHAME ON YOU, ELVES! I was kinda hoping someone would get to paint Kenley green.
In consultations, Pleather basically designs his own outfit, which can only spell trouble. CutToe says she'll do whatever he wants but if he has any problems with her he better tell her to her face instead of waiting to say it in front of Tim so she doesn't have to cut his balls off and feed them to him on national TV. He laughs like she's joking, but she doesn't laugh back. Cut's really not holding back the bitch today, and I likey.
Squirc does a rap for us to commemorate Kenley picking her for a hip hop outfit. "Kenley's gonna make an outfit for me. She better not make it look like it's from nineteen fif-ty!" LOL, Squirc. Add a couple "pu**y juice"s and "Holla"s in there and you'll have Missy Elliot running for the hills. Kenley tells her that lots of people are wearing high wasted jeans right now. IN HIP HOP. LOLOLLLLLL.
Jackie Honassis
Squirc, wisely stays quiet and tries not to jump up and down excitedly as Kenley digs her own grave. Jerell asks Pleather for a giant rock collar and a cape. Pleather worries that since the judges called him dated last week he will get in trouble for making something that looks like Kiss would have worn in the eighties. I wonder if the judges told him he was an annoying talentless hack, he'd stop being an annoying talentless hack. Hobosexi tells Kenley that he's gonna turn her into "Kenley Spears". HA. I am loving this episode. He says "you're sellin' sex. You're sellin' sex" and she just horsey giggles. I have a feeling this is gonna be more Britney from last year's VMA's than the sex seller.
With bangs.
CutToe has no idea what to suggest to Squirc for her country outfit. She just sits there and tries not to cut herself while Squirc tells us that she's going to do her best not to make a costume. Kenley comes over and asks Squirc to try on some pants and CutToe tells her her time is up and she needs to get lost before Cut gets all hip hop on her ass. Kenley won't shut up so Cut just "bleh"s a lot and waves her away. This woman is becoming my hero tonight.
Tim takes them all to Mood, where Kenley picks out loud Mrs. Roeper fabric. He tries to warn her that it's not hip hop and she argues with him and says it looks like graffiti.
The writing on the wall?
He stresses his point and she puts her hand up to the side of her head so she doesn't have to see him and sticks out her tongue and squeezes her nose like he stinks. Finally, Tim throws his hands up in the air. Five designers left and still at least two who shoulda been gone long ago. From now on, every recap will be titled "Well Done, Casting Department. Well Done" so I don't have to keep saying it over and over again.
CutToe is looking for stretch denim for Pleather. In related news, I'm not hungry. She continues her hero streak back at the workroom by telling everyone that she's gonna look like "Shania Jank" in Squircangle's design. HAHAH. For those of you who don't know what jank is, here is the description from UrbanDictionary.com: adj- broken; unnecessarily redundant, superfluous, or meaningless; stupid or ridiculously moronic; bootleg or of questionable quality. Fuck! This CD player I bought off Ebay is jank. Squirc doesn't have access to UD at the moment, so she doesn't know that Cut just called her a hack. Like I said. Hero.
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Comments (32)
Darling Flipit,
I rolled out of bed this morning cranky as hell, got my coffee and procrastinated by reading your recap. I love you!!! This was one of the funniest recaps I've ever read and I'll probably be a much nicer person today now that I've snorted coffee all over my keyboard...
Hugs,
Yenta
1 of 32 | Posted by yentapatrol | Posted on September 25, 2008 5:45 AM
Great recap Flip!
You didn't state the obvious about the Shame's outfit Hobisexual was wearing - did you not scream in horror when you noticed:
A. Shame/Blame/Suede stuffed his pants with one of his socks
B. One of the Parson's rooftop squirrels lodged itself in his crotch
C. Pants complete with a reverse trunk monkey!
2 of 32 | Posted by krut | Posted on September 25, 2008 5:48 AM
Flipit, I can think of no better way to delay starting my Thursday morning at work than by reading your PRun recaps!
I was squealing with glee as Kenley got her semi-comeuppance from Tim and/or Nina this week; how much of an a-hole do you have to be to make Tim Gunn genuinely angry?!
I squealed later in the show, too, but that was from horror when they kept zooming in on Jerell's moose knuckle. Despite said crime against my retinas, he is still growing on me.
3 of 32 | Posted by MissKatrina | Posted on September 25, 2008 5:57 AM
I'm just disappointed that the rest of the designers didn't all start laughing when Kenley was getting dressed-down on the runway.
I really really really hate her. I'm hoping they kept her around so that they can cut her right before the finale.
4 of 32 | Posted by Pegster | Posted on September 25, 2008 6:53 AM
"he's not just being a dick for fun. He's also doing for money. And his own show."
Hah!
Also, loved Leanne's "hip-hop walk" down the runway.
5 of 32 | Posted by rubinia | Posted on September 25, 2008 7:02 AM
Great recap! I especially love the 50's housewife graphic captioned "YOYOYO mothafuckas!"
I noticed in the beginning credits that the name Richard Bye was displayed when Pleather was on camera. Just sayin'.
6 of 32 | Posted by mousecat | Posted on September 25, 2008 7:27 AM
Funniest line in TVGasm history. Ever.
"After a moment of waiting for Nina's poisonous neck sack to deflate..." accompanied by that screencap = priceless.
I'm still laughing 10 minutes later...
7 of 32 | Posted by goettin | Posted on September 25, 2008 7:49 AM
Flipit, you continue to make me snort laughter real hard and now I have a piece of bagel caught in my nasal cavity. I just KNEW you were going to get a screen shot of the CutToe eye-roll (that was FABULOUS) and everything else was right-on as usual... much love to you!
love, J-Mo :)
8 of 32 | Posted by J-Mo | Posted on September 25, 2008 8:24 AM
That was the most awesome PR show to date!!! And your recap was right up there too- thank you!
I can't even write anymore, too much to love. Maybe if I watch it again? All I can do right now is sit here with a goofy smile shaking my head.
9 of 32 | Posted by mrsc | Posted on September 25, 2008 8:26 AM
oh flipit, your recaps are so good i'm sad when they are over...
count me in on the kenley hate bandwagon. she's so obnoxious. jerell should have put her in a britney thong-outfit and made her wobble down the runway in shame.
pegster--good point. when she gets eliminated (notice i said "when" and not "if") they should all bust out laughing. that would make my life.
10 of 32 | Posted by AuJew | Posted on September 25, 2008 8:44 AM
Why was Squirc walking like a giraffe with an amputated leg? And why so many Hobo crotch shots? This was the best show this season, and that's sad. GREAT recap, as usual!
11 of 32 | Posted by sevenfourteen | Posted on September 25, 2008 9:19 AM
Hey! So, I just noticed that Wikipedia has done it again and (I won't list them here) in the episode recap of episode 13 lists the three finalists. Check it out.
12 of 32 | Posted by armstrae | Posted on September 25, 2008 9:31 AM
OMG
so i use these recaps to get through my heinous 8 am finance lectures and now thanks to you everyone is wondering why the crazy girl in the back is giggling about compounding interest and APRs.
amazing recap
13 of 32 | Posted by tvaddict | Posted on September 25, 2008 9:40 AM
No one understands Kenley's aesthetic. I had no idea 'back biting bitch with over-inflated ego' was an aesthetic.
Jerell should have won. His Britneyizing of Kenley was genius. If only she had flashed her cooter on the runway he might have.
14 of 32 | Posted by gitgo | Posted on September 25, 2008 10:55 AM
Lucille Van Pelt was my childhood hero..firt, Mommaellis1 called her a cranky lesbian,Condeleeza Rice stole her hairstyle and now Flipit has let the world know that she bares a striking resemblance to Kenley. I now have to go to my list and pick another hero. I'm running out of candidates. I am now left with Natalie from Facts of Life, "Dude" from the old Dell Commercials, Horeshack, the old lady who lived across the street from my childhood home that was arrested for prostitution at the ripe old age of 63 (true story), the lady who had me and my sister shuck 6 garbage bags full of corn and then gave us a quarter and told us to split it, and my foster mother who just the other day called me and said "Hello "extra cash", can you do the world a favor and not wear anything above the knee. Trust me."
15 of 32 | Posted by Fayellis1 | Posted on September 25, 2008 1:04 PM
alas, another season grounds to a halt, and thank f*in christ Pleatha is outta there!!! My Lord, so long, long, long overdue.
Fun to see them all conspire against Kenley Spears, but I did think that look was right on, puck was okay too--jeans looked great in make and all. Go Cut, and Go Leanne--she was pretty funny in her willingness to be a total dork!
Thanks for the speedy recap, as always Flip!!!! You're the nuclear bomb!!!! xoxox
16 of 32 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on September 25, 2008 1:26 PM
"After a moment of waiting for Nina's poisonous neck sack to deflate"
holy crap! I almost wet myself.
17 of 32 | Posted by celmo | Posted on September 25, 2008 1:58 PM
I think I hate Kenley more than any other contestant I've ever seen on this show. Her attitude towards Tim is insulting and while her designs aren't bad, they're nothing special. At least the other designers don't laugh at her when she's getting critiqued (and she would deserve it). I loved Jerrell telling her that the earrings she picked were hip hop when they so clearly were not. I'm hoping that either Leanne or Cut wins the whole thing.
18 of 32 | Posted by murphena | Posted on September 25, 2008 2:30 PM
Dammit, Flipit, you made me wet myself. I've never laughed so hysterically while reading a recap. The dog is scared. Teaching him to howl when he sees Kenley- bad Kenley.
19 of 32 | Posted by mediagirl | Posted on September 25, 2008 3:26 PM
Dammit, Flipit, you made me wet myself. I've never laughed so hysterically while reading a recap. The dog is scared. Teaching him to howl when he sees Kenley- bad Kenley.
20 of 32 | Posted by mediagirl | Posted on September 25, 2008 3:26 PM
Joining in on the "poisonous neck sac" riot train. I've actually been having to wipe my eyes throughout the day just thinking about it. I think it's in the Top 10 TVGasm recap lines in history, let alone just PR. Thanks for being so fast!
and I guess some a-hole took down the Wiki winner info, rats, I wanted to cheat...
21 of 32 | Posted by killbondnow | Posted on September 25, 2008 4:30 PM
sevenfourteen, I for one would love to see more of Jerrell's reverse trunk monkey pants! tee hee
And flipit, I too was disappointed that LL (fanning myself) wasn't wearing your favorite outfit.
Best moment for me: Jerrell telling "Tim & Joe" to behave in the apartment!
Worst mooment for me: "Kenley, you're in."
When you feel the pain for Suede, you know there's some massive hate going on. She's worse than Lisa of TC4.
22 of 32 | Posted by hutchlover | Posted on September 25, 2008 5:25 PM
The producers really stirred the pot on this one. Suede's outfit was meh but I'd like to know in what global dimension Kenley's was Hip Hop. Poor Leanne looked like my neighbor when she goes to play Bingo and thinks she looks so cool.
I wanted to see the cheat on Wiki too just to know Kenley didn't make it.
Thanks for the fast and funny recap.
23 of 32 | Posted by skies | Posted on September 25, 2008 8:29 PM
Did anyone else notice how badly Jerell did on the runway walk? Everyone else when they walked down at least tried to sell their look, but the former professional model did everything he could to sabotage the look, slouching and shuffling down the runway. If he had done a decent job Kenley might have gone home instead. I can't be sure who I wanted off more, but Jerell certainly was a factor.
24 of 32 | Posted by Fitz | Posted on September 25, 2008 9:45 PM
"Fun to see them all conspire against Kenley Spears, but I did think that look was right on:
Juddfan, please please please tell me you are talking about Jerrell's outfit for Kenley and not Kenley's "hip hop" fiasco.
Kenley is just...I have no more words. I'm through with her. She pissed off my Timmers, and he never gets mad.
I loooooved Tim in this episode. He totally busted out laughing at them after they came back from make-up, he totally bitch-slapped Kenley when she whined at him and he seems genuinely happy this season.
Korto has some SERIOUS junk in her trunk. That woman's ass probably controls the tide.
And is it sad that as an African American chicka, I was happy as hell that all the designers chose "colored" models and left those dastardly blondes in the dust? (Sorry to blonde people, but you've had your shot, give it up to the coloreds!)
25 of 32 | Posted by pixiegal262 | Posted on September 25, 2008 10:23 PM
Oh woe is me, I feel so lonely, but I just can't get onboard the hate-Kenley train...
I mean, I have felt intense dislike for certain reality tv characters in the past, so it's not like I'm incapable of despising an image on my television screen. It's just that... I see Kenley simply as being young and immature and most likely insecure and that she'll grow out of it.
Maybe it's because I'm still kind of stuck in that 50s look myself... I really do think the clothing world went downhill from there.
And of course, now that I know there's a pretty nice looking body underneath her 50s housefrau getup, well, sorry...it's so obvious to me that she just needs to grow a little inside...(in other words, she's hiding herself behind the obnoxiousness).
I agree her design was ridiculous...although Leanne...grrrrowwlll again!
There's no way they could keep Pleather and eliminate Kenley though. She's the only one who really has a coherent style --the others just kind of flonder...or produce boring gap-like clothing.
26 of 32 | Posted by itchy | Posted on September 26, 2008 12:03 AM
I can't believe I didn't mention the sock drawer in Hobo's pants!! My bad! I sure as hell had a good laugh over it. And mousecat thanks for pointing out the Rich Bye thing. I was disappointed that Pleather wasn't given a Sidekick on to call the living relatives of his family. I'm glad the editors are still slipping Easter eggs in there for us.
And Itchy, poor itchy! I think your assessment of Kenley is right on. She's just immature and will (hopefully) grow into a better person with time. But remember that if she was a better person she wouldn't be on our TV's, so YAY to no self awareness.
Thanks so much for reading you guys, I love loling at your comments. Peace
27 of 32 | Posted by flipit | Posted on September 26, 2008 4:22 AM
Great recap as always!! Is anyone else wondering why they rechose models this week since they didn't use them anyway? Now we'll have to go through that torture again next week. How could Squirc ditch her cute blond girl? That shouldn't be allowed so late in the season.
I can't stand Kenley either, but to give her credit, she rocked the Kenley Spears outfit, and when asked about it she was totally positive. Jerrell was a total jerk-off in the way he walked the runway. Dude, if you're that insecure in your own designs that you have to try and sabatouge someone else, that's sad. ESPECIALLY when that person is Pleather.
And HOW did that freakin' Tresemme salon make Squirc's bangs look worse than they already were? I was hoping for a totally new haircut.
Can't wait til next week to see Kenley smack down Heidi!!
28 of 32 | Posted by LindaLC | Posted on September 26, 2008 5:51 AM
Who knows? Maybe the reason why they're all crying in the preview is because Kenley suddenly reached a new level of enlightenment and has decided to dedicate herself to a life of charity and self-effacement.
And to having her teeth fixed.
Did I mention Leanne? Grrowwll!
29 of 32 | Posted by itchy | Posted on September 26, 2008 8:44 AM
Someone answer me this: have they ever switched models from another still there designer or ditched their girl and took the last challenge's loser? I can't remember that happening before but I missed a few seasons but just can't seem to remember it happening before. I was pretty surprised Squirc switched. Not as surprised as her (now former) model, I am sure.
30 of 32 | Posted by mrsc | Posted on September 26, 2008 9:51 AM
Yes, Pixie, I meant Kenley's look by Hobo was right on.
Itchy, I don't hate Kenley either, I usually would, but some how she is escaping my wrath, hate Pleatha tho--coz of being a poser and a loser, which is mean of me, but isn't here where I get to let my hate shine!!!
Forgot to mention the scrumptious LL---mmmmmmmm, he is toooo fine, and not show cased enough here. Momma said knock you out!!!!
Mrsc, I too was surprised Leanimal ditched her model--I'm not huge on blonde's either, but she had a waist to die for, and was part of the reason her car recycle outfit was so smokin'
I could see why Kenley changed, as she got saddled with her's, after loosing her fierce model.
I don't know all the history, but I do know Uli stole Michael's model right before the finale on their season. Maybe Pleatha's model is great, but I haven't noticed as she's always wrapped in fug.
To be fair, Pleatha did do a good job on the pants, but I think it must have been harder for Hobo to wear those than for Kenley to wear hers . . . Im just sayin'
31 of 32 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on September 26, 2008 11:14 AM
Long time reader, first time poster. Your recaps just make my humdrum day. Poisonous neck sack and Susan Powter on too much sodium actually made my heart stop for a couple of seconds. Can't wait for next week!
32 of 32 | Posted by shantigal | Posted on September 26, 2008 3:01 PM