MN was good the first week. THAT'S IT!

Obviously someone else has shiny pants in his closet.

Logan did not deserve bottom three over either Feather or Irina's skating costume, but he left his shiny pants in the closet with MN's. (or maybe MN's been wearing Logan's at night)

Second week in a row Christopher should've gone home.

BTW, Mackie being the father of Padma's baby? Best.line.ever!

My darling Flipit~

I think you mean FSH said there will be no more "immunity" this season, not "elminations" as that would take all the fun out of it! :)

Love, Dallashockeymom

You left out Godfathershausen, Flipit. :-) Yay pizza!

I was sorry to see Elvis go, because of all the winning outfits this season, her maternity one was the only one that I agreed with wholeheartedly. And of course, because MN is still there. I did like his vampire princess thing, but I think that's the only one ever, and even then I thought Epperson's was better. And yes, he made fitted shorts this time. But what was over them first? A coat with balloon-like hips! Get off my TV screen, one-trick pony!!!!!

I hate that bitch Irina with a passion (see Carol Hannah's comments about Elvis to see how it's done, you godawful bitch), and I wanted her gone, but I think I'll put up with her for a few more weeks if it means you'll cook up some more delicious "oh my god they killed Irina you bastards" scenarios for us, Flipit.

When the models come in, there are definitely vaginas everywhere. So there's that.

I can't fault Irina for being bitchy. You try being born with a nose in the shape of a vegetable.

At least each week we get the extra special treat of hearing Elvis say "I'm zhe besht deshigner heeyer!" in that Kidssongs voice.

But yeah, didn't she win a couple of challenges? There's no way the crybaby with the beard jaw deserves to stick around.

The only problem I have with C-H is those black eyes. It's like someone punches her every morning. I'm guessing that without the makeup she looks more like a Hatfield than a McCoy.

Which is why she looks like Straight Guy's sister. Which makes it all make sense. The attraction, I mean.

All the vagina comments reminded me of the horrible train wreck of the Fashion Show and Anna's vagina dress that she kept making over and over again.

I actually shouted at the screen when they booted Elvis over MN. I mean WHAT THE EFF?! He has been in the bottom like every week, right? And this time he made one of her old costumes! At least Elvis made her own outfit even if it was fugly. It wasn't unsavably fugly. The top was cute. He had a fucking Holly Hobby big button unflattering ugly coat and a ripoff hooker outfit underneath. GAH! How could both Elvis and Epperson go home and that fugbag stay? I swear to god, if he is blowing Tim, I'll... I'll... Well I won't do anything, but I'll be very disappointed in Tim.

And as a very strange sidenote, last night I had a dream in which I was on the show making the look for Xtina. And it was hot! lol Maybe I need to get out more, eh?

Thanks for another great recap!

You know what I forgot to mention?

This is Bob*Fricking*Mackie!

Where were the outrageous outfits? The tons of sequins & headresses?

Where was Chris March to knock these lame-designers off the runway and show them how it's done!

Hutchlover, I was thinking the exact same thing. This was definitely a challenge that Chris March would have ROCKED! He would have had fireworks shooting out of a headdress and all kinds of shit. Love that guy. And Bob Mackie! BOB MACKIE! I peed a little when he came out. I've always been a huge fan!

Who am I not a fan of? Icemeyer. It can go fuck itself.

Flipi- I think that you need a Bob Mackie barbie after writing this recap. Reading your recaps is like riding with your head out of the window of a speeding freight train. There is just no time to come up for air before the next thing comes flying at you. Well done sir. Well done.

I'm sorry Shirin went home, but that means MN stayed--his big gay tears make me laugh and laugh.

Gordana's face makes me afraid, though. If it weren't for my Obi Wan night light, I'd never get any sleep at all after an episode of PR.

Can't believe I forgot Godfather's!! Is that place still around? And thanks for the "eliminations" call out I changed it. You guys thanks so much for commenting these always make me smile. And Jarthon you should win some sort of prize, because yes of COURSE it was Anna's Vagina dress I was thinking of!! I knew there was someone on one of these shows obsessed with vaginas so thank you for reminding me. I wonder what ever happened to her....I hope she finally found a vagina.

itchy - That is so NOT the nose she was born with. That is the typical pinch-the-point nosejob every ethnic person gets. It's horrible on the trashy ho's around LA and it's horrible on her. She should have gone to MN's doctor.

Is Logan seriously dating Darryl Hannah? Cause he could do SO much better. She looks a little like Gollum to me. And I think he's cute, in a bland, hipster kind of way. Maybe they just don't show him when he's being interesting. All the models seem to be crushing on him too. He should have went with one of them.

Sigh. Is it too much to ask for that my reality tv characters be real?

Imagine my heartbreak at the end of every Scooby-doo episode.

Okay, I couldn't resist...How about frozen:
digiornohausen, redbaronhausen, californiapizzakitchenhausen....!

So Shirin is gone. She was a little annoying, but she had a sweetness too. I thought either MN or SG should have gone before her. They both stink. I think the two of them and Gordy will be gone in the next few weeks. So FD might make the finals! Weird.

I loved that Irina was the mediocre one this time. I must say though that Irina's bitchiness is making this season more exciting. It was pretty blah early on.

Love the South Park references, Flipit!

Praise the Lord and pass the sequins, Nina is back!!!

I didn't realize how much she brings to this show in the short amount of time we get to see her! As usual Flipit, great recap! You always make me laugh out loud in all of your recaps.

ARgh!!! This season is killing me . . . I'm sorry, but that was 3 strikes for bad nose job MN (did you really mean that, jadestarla-coz that's a crooked, pixie piece of shit, if you ask me) and three strikes and you're out . . . but, somehow, those Gunn sexy times are saving him, or something. I'm always glad when they give someone a chance to learn, grow and improve, but he shot his load weeks ago, and there's nothing left but dry heaves . . . it's time for him to take his education to the next level and perhaps he could be great. The 80's, tho I love them, are over . . .

And I forgot to say, he should not have had a chance at the price of Elvis--she's won a few, and been in the top group, and is overall just better, than both SG and MN. In my opinion, SG should have went with that Pebble's on the ho stroll piece of shit--talk about 80's gone wrong, it was too wrong, and I agree about the beady Hatfield eyes, itchy, but I don't hate her.

I was glad the editors played with your favorite murder victim, Flip, justice was served with a CH win, but once again, Elvis should have stayed to provide the One Two!!! I think she's a lesbian who can't admit her attraction to the girls in ?, so she hates them instead.

I wish the world liked big noses as much as I do, and thin lips to boot!!! May as well add just right breasts, while I'm at it!

Feather's was really well fitted, but so done before--his attitude was better this time, and if he's calling Anvil a bitch . . . what does that tell us.

If I'd been CH, and overheard Anvil calling me out to her model, as if she's waited all day to say it, I'd have chucked a tampon at her and told her to plug it up! (sorry if I offended any female gasmi with that . . . blame Carrie!)

Overall, this was pretty blah considering what they were asking for. Hopefully JoePeep'shausen can get it back together ; )

Thanks as always for the romp, Flip it!!!

XOXOXOXO

Yeah Flipit! Awesome as always.

@Itchy - so totes agree about CH's eyes... she looks like a sorority girl after a frat party with her runny, overdone makeup. I like her personality, but just did not get the love for her dress this week. All black for the stage? Even with the different textures, it was still very dark.

I'm with the posters who think this was a great chance to go nuts - and none of them did.

Hating on Irina.... but loving on Flip!

Flip, I was seriously alarmed about your sudden change of view re: Elvis. Clearly you were nearly taken in by her sweetness and light. No one is that sweet, unless they have signed a contract with Satan. Given her dress for the challenge -- a heavy satin, white ruffled mess sure to make any female hate herself and her hips –- it’s quite possible that the Devil’s inspiration was at work behind the garment. (If the Devil dresses as a French Maid in his spare time.) Poor Elvis really blew it, but to be sent home when when Minnesota is still there? Crazy!

At any rate, nice to see you back to your vitriolic best with this recap, unswayed by Elvis’ siren-like sweetness or MN's puppy dog faces.

I swear I had little tears in my eyes when I saw who the guest judge was – Bob Mackie! Adore! He dressed Cher through the 80s and early nineties in a thousand outfits, all of which had her stumping for Queen of Fashion Police Citations for a decade. Assless chaps? Mackie. Indian princess getup? Mackie. Mesh! Feathers! Sequins! Bless him, He is The First Name in Fun and Tacky Tastelessness (albeit, Intricately Designed Fun and Tacky Tastelessness)! And as none of these designers have an ounce of taste, so this should have been gravy for them.

And then Xtina was unmasked -- I laughed aloud. Could they make this any easier for them? They need, what?, just enough fabric to cover her bits and some sequins. Easy, peesey!

Then they designed. Holy Hell. First of all, did anyone besides Feather Duster know who Christina Aguilera is? She's been around -- what? -- 12 years.

And, seriously, the show gives you Bob Mackie – and you see all his sequiny, glitzy glamour with Xtina as their goddess of inspriation and they come up with ...

The Oscars or the Iceapades. Either all covered up in a long dress or spandexed to her body with flounce. Ugh.

And then the designers are handed Xtina as their inspiration … WTF, people! It’s Xtina! You know what that “X” stands for? It’s to block out whichever of her amazing bits she’s showing off!

And Mackie is all about the cooch-shot! Vulgarity! Slutty-go-go! Come on! And headdresses, dang it! Not to mention, the designers have been making their skirts too short all effing season only to fail when faced w/ the Xtina-Mackie combo? Did this ode to tack blow their brain cells out? Argh!

I. Hurt. Mackie deserved so much better than this.

Minnesota: Ward forgot to tell the Beaver he needs to stop it with the bloody poof-effect re: skirts and blouses for the last how many shows, but it looks like he remembered this time. So we end up with Xtina as Cyndi Lauper? WTF? MN, Lauper is before your time, dear. She, a goddess, did not wear crap like that ... THAT. The only girls who wear THAT are in Pokemon cartoons, drawn by men who rarely see what real women dress like anyway. And even the Pokemon artists do a better job at it than you. Hang your head, MN! Cry, bitch, because if Mackie wouldn't dress a backup dancer in your costume, you need to head back to Ross Dress For Less. Even that might be to high for you to aim for. A nice rock to crawl under in Siberia might be a better post.

And when he told Elvis she needed to stand behind her second-rate French maid costume as it represented her as a designer, I felt like crying at the screen, "No, Elvis! Don't listen to him!" The only reason Elvis had to stand behind her monstrosity would have been if she were sending it through a shredder bit by ugly bit. Elvis, clearly having lost contact with her Lord Satan, agreed with MN because it is much easier to go along with insightful words from a fashion designer with no formal training from Minnesota than relying on her own judgment that the red satin prom dress fabric was actually a better choice than black satin French maid fabric. Wrong again, side burns!

Elvis: Remember when her model wanted an sailor-inspired electric blue silk jumpsuit with cord? And Elvis decided that she knew best and made a cute little dress instead. She should have made that jumpsuit this go ‘round. With harem pants. And sequined anchors all over the damned thing. And somehow managing to bare the belly ‘cause the less is more angle is not something Christina Aguilera is known for.

Has Project Runway finely jumped the Leah, a la Hosea? That's what its looking like, kittens, because based on her last few looks versus MN's, no question who is the better designer. Someone hand Elvis a nice peanut butter and nanna sandwich.

Straight Guy: I saw this at dress at Express two seasons ago; that is not a compliment. The only chance he took was deciding which should be the model, Wilma or Betty. It looked terribly cheap to me, especially the fur bit. And he should have gone shorter and more figure-flattering, but that would mean he’d actually have to know how to design. I’m not sure he does. The best thing he has managed to do all season is to pull himself into a pair of silver pants. That’s a pretty neat trick. Clearly, he’s Hosea from Top Chef, kept around because romance is more important than fashion to the Lifetime Network. I kept questioning my TV screen during this episode of judging. “Really, Nina Garcia, really? I mean, foil pants aside, what has he done but produce several shoddy outfits that unflatter the bust or butt line of every model he’s had?” OK, I realize a Straight Guy is a big deal in fashion, but he kind of sucks kind of hard, and not in a pleasure enhancing way.

As for the Romance, I don't see it. He's clearly more in love with his reflection than any living, breathing person.

Irina: Mega-bitchtastic! Love it! Fits right in with this challenge, unlike the designs. Irina's attitude does makes me wish I believed in flying midgets who behead evil wenches. Sadly machete-bearing Cupids who undo evil-doers have long since gone the way of Santa Claus (I was six and slept under the tree, hidden from view; sadly this did not hide me to view of my parents laying out my presents and then making the beast with two backs right before my little eyes; come to think of it, this is probably the day I stopped believing in God, too). Her dress? Meh. Blegh. Of course it was; she used all her bitchery on everyone else so there wasn't enough left for the dress, which looks like the sort of thing you would see at the Stars on Ice show.

Carol-Hannah: Gag. Her Southern witticisms are about as Southern as a Nor’easter and her puppy love for Straight Guy is repulsive. I can see why it won – quite a pretty dress, and while it isn’t new or inventive, it was a damned sight better than the others. It’s a good thing the judges didn’t have magnifying glasses to see the glue-gunning genius that she worked on the number because she wasted too much time drooling over SG. She should have spent Drool Time making a feather headdress. They all should have! Where were the headdresses, bitches! This was a Bob Mackie challenge, FFS!!!!

Gordana: I don’t understand why she didn’t just shorten the dress by doing away with that ridiculously long swath of satin at the bottom. Sure, the garment would come up to Xtina’s cooch, but she likes that. A cute little pair of knickers with some stupid sequiny design on it, and you have the perfect Xtina look. And she should corset the top while she was at it -- Xtina likes the girls up and at'em.

Althea: Great dress, and I covet the fur coat-thing, mainly because I loved Snufflelupacus as a kid.

Feather Duster: Regurgitates his Alien Goddess Dress, though it turned out to be a better hairball than the first time he spit it out. This dress could also be Oksana Byual’s white swan dress sans headdress that she wore for her long program during the 19- whatever Winter Olympic Games where she outclassed Poor Nancy Kerrigan’s Knee to win Gold and become the media’s Preferred Media Darling. Really, maybe FD *should* have added a headdress, too. Am so disappointed.

I expected to see !Color, !Feathers and !Sequins, but all I got was Atlantic City, the morning after. Bah. This is crap, people. Bob Mackie is the ultimate in Freedom to Express Yourself and all we got were a bunch of pedestrian black and white dresses. Color me pissed off with this crew. Bring back my Huggy Bear Chris to show these bitches how to rock out (he *does* design for Christina; I wonder if that is how Project Runway got a hold of her).

Sorry about the book, I was a bit pissed off by the whole show. I need to go find a puppy to kick now.

Jenna, I know you just wrote a book, but what is the word on hem's and waists--are they always seasonal, or can they be more to accommodate a particular body type?

One thing I don't like about Althea's stuff is the granny waists--is it in? After all that guff with Jessica Simpson . . help!

Next week? Donuts & coffee: KrispyKremehausen, Winchellshausen, Diedrichhausen, and don't forget, Seattlesbesthausen...the fun goes on, lol.

zbird, you left out the one that qualifies in both categories! DunkinDonutsHausen... Mmmm Dunkin Donuts.

Juddfan, you should always dress for your body. You could have on the highest of high couture creation, but if it doesn't fit your body type, you'll look like a Kmart blue light special. And let's face it. Few people can or will wear what walks down a runway. However, many of the general styles can be adapted to any body. But unless you are pin thin and can afford a well made piece of clothing, don't attempt the super high waist. You'll look like crap. ;-)

Thanks Snootchy, and I heartily agree, I just don't know if that's what fashion dictates . . . don't they always have a new black? fortunately, I'm a guy, so I don't have to worry about hems, except on those special occasions, ; ) ; ) and then it's always short!!!!

kahem

Fuck you icemayer, climb back under the rock you came from!!!!

juddfan: Snootchy is dead on as usual. Most trends get watered down by the time they reach the "real world." And thank goodness for that! I imagine that McQueen's full-on futuristic reptilian invader looks from Spring 2010 are going to end up being some kick arse heels in metallic reptile print that will pair perfectly with the LBD. Easy to wear and good for a night out or casually with jeans, a white-button down and an interesting scarf.

I always tell my ladies that style is about finding yourself, not someone else's idea of you. If it doesn't fit or you feel uncomfortable with it, then it won't work for you no matter how expensive it is. Fit always trumps trend.

As for the Granny look, it works best on slight women, very slender with no chests. Not Jessica Simpson. If you have a curvy figure like hers and want to work a high waist, try doing a pencil skirt version and a silk blouse, with a cardy and interesting brooch. Sexy Secretary is the other side of the Granny coin, really, with high waists. It's just how the waist is being accented. I like using both wide and skinny belts about the high part of the skirt, under the cardy or over, in interesting textures or color combos.

If you are short and like high waist pants, try a wide leg with high heels (wedges will really give you height). I tend to go tight on top here, which is why smaller bustlines can better do this style. If you are busty with broad shoulders, just don't do it. Stick to the skirts and light-weight tops. Jessica ended up aging herself in mommy jeans and making herself look bigger than she actually is. All the talk about her being fat is just plain sick. I feel for the girl. She has to watch her entire personal life play out on the national scene, complete with her younger sister marrying and spawning, her ex-boyfriends being twatish, etc. And then they pick on her hips. She wouldn't be the only chica to reach for the Hagan Daaz when times suck; unfortunately, she has to do it and be pap-smeared by the press.

Mad Men has set off a lot of 40s inspired designs on the Spring runways, so you would still be on trend, just using it to fit you. Being unique and true to yourself is always more important than being part of the herd.

Miu Miu has some gorgeous creations, but the best I saw for the Everywoman would be Celine's. Simply perfect looks that any woman can wear. Phoebe Philo is doing wonders for them. Another great source of inspiration is the Galliano couture collection. Pay attention to the shapes he creates and the textures he is combining. Lace on print on silk. Lots of pretty, ladylike flourishes that can be taken into the real world by finding shapes that work for you but are inspired by his moodboard (Old Hollywood, 40s style, with exaggerated curves). Ditto with designers like Westwood and McQueen. They are fantasy shows but you can still use the colors and moods adopted by the lines to create your own trendy look, especially with vintage.

If you like trend-spotting, the best thing to do is go to Tokyo or French street style sites. You can get lots of ideas from what the average person on the street wears. Also, try Garance Dore and The Sartorialist. Great sites with ageless fashion. E-mail me if you want links/tips for your size/evs. Helping ladies find themselves through fashion is a passion of mine. :)

Erg. Another book, sorry, sorry, Flip. Didn't mean to hijack your fantastic recap.