Tonight on the Season 7 Premiere of Project Runway, tears! Old American Idol runner ups! Kors with a (possibly) legitimate tan! Come on in!
Alright, Kors, now you're overdoing it.
****I don't go into too much detail on the designer intros here cuz I already wrote and intro article. If you are interested, or just have LOTS of time on your hands, check it out here.
Lifetime is pulling some dickery on me right off the bat by starting a minute early. The first words I hear in the already started episode is "Dior. Tom Ford. Karl Lagerfeld." Let me guess: The clue was "People That Could Possibly Comb My Hair For Me."
This is Seth Aaron Henderson, or as I like to think of him, retired Adam Hambert from American Idol. Seth Aaron is 37 (don't buy it) on the outside, but he's fifteen inside you guys! You can tell cuz he's got really hip dirty hair, green mascara, and a bandana as an ascot. But just in case you aren't feeling the youth yet, he jumps on the bed and then sneaks off to the bathroom to jerk off to an International Male catalogue. Then my Meemaw breaks into the bathroom and tells him that masturbating is just a sinful way of producing lots of tiny little souls and then flushing them down the toilet before they ever had a chance to become productive human beings, which is their God given right. MURDERER!!
Seth Aaron is all about FUUUUN! He likes to take vintage clothes and add his own, modern look. So basically, he's into facelifts. One great thing about this show is that people lay their psychosis bare for us and they don't even realize they're doing it. Can't judge though. I'm sure if I was a contestant I would only make jogging pants and plastic shirts so I could just wipe off pizza grease instead of going to Target once a week to replenish my wardrobe.
The next contestant to arrive are knees. Cuz the editors are a bunch of horny guys in 1920.
I hope Gordana Beaverhausen gets a guest star spot this year, if only to see how her cute dimpled knees react to this skinny bitch's.
This is Janeane from Oregon, and she's here to assure us that she's much more than a stairmaster addict. She walks into the apartment and immediately starts sobbing. LOL. "This is the beginning of the everything!" She sees her whole life right in front of her. She'll get to Bryant Park, win the show, guest star on Ugly Betty and meet the ladies of the View, get offers from B listers who need clothes for Pinkberry openings, have a nervous breakdown when a Kardashian busts an ass seam, become addicted to meth, and disappear forever. Except for when she has to show up at Dress Barn for her shifts. Ah, positive thinking. It's so .... sad?
Waaaahhhhh!!
Bangs and a mullet rolled into one. And you thought it couldn't be done.
Next in is PingPong. She's a trained physical therapist and a trained designer, so she really knows how a body moves. Well, after it's been in a horrible accident or something. I'm afraid Pong is gonna get too method and start whacking her models in the shins, just so they'll limp realistically enough to sell her clothes. She says that she's always searching for da seempless cot for body movement. I don't know what that means, but all of her sketches show faceless women kicking one of their legs to the side, like they're about to kiss some faceless dude.
Or maybe they just need a realignment.
This one's doing the mash potato.
Anthony is up next. He looks like Mary J Blige with a little meat on her bones. He is our bright, colorful Flamingay of the season.
Flamingo
FlamÃngay
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Comments (16)
WB Flipit!
I was LOVING the Emilio'th dress, even though I'd fit in PingPong's better.
I think Jesse looks like a cuter, more filled out version of Logan from last year.
Initially I thought Old Hambert was gay, but wearing that burnished suede maroon smoking jacket? Only straight guys dress that bad. I did love the construction and work of his dress, though.
And the color! After last season's beige & black - fest, I'm so glad to see some color!
1 of 16 | Posted by hutchlover | Posted on January 15, 2010 5:37 PM
I want to adopt Anthony. That guy is hilarious! And I was very disappointed in Christiane. I wanted some drama. Stomp! Flounce! Curse the judges! She just gave them a blank stare. But, that kind of makes sense. She has inflated opinions of her dressmaking abilites AND her dramatics.
Ah, well. She can still sew better than me. My Dead Bride costume of 1998 won the Halloween Costume contest at work, and made a little boy in the grocery store break down and sob, but I don't think Michael or Nina would have approved.
2 of 16 | Posted by Baffled | Posted on January 15, 2010 6:30 PM
hahaha, i was thinking the same thing at the beginning...lifetime def. started early, if only dvr knew that!
and...im in love with Anthony...hysterical
is anyone recapping the "models of the runway" this season?
great recap, as always :)
3 of 16 | Posted by chrissy | Posted on January 15, 2010 8:31 PM
I am still all tangled up in the comments you made about the pants that are intended to catch a baby. That was incredibly funny and incredibly crass which is the best combination.
But I was disappointed to see Anthony in the bottom. I was so hoping that he would have the talent to back up his personality because that would just be a perfect combination. Plus he hasn't gotten annoying yet and I want him to be around the entire season.
Christine was the one needed to go home. Her dress was poorly designed and the fit was all wrong. You knew she was going to be the one to go because she talked such a big game.
And I do heart the wacky Ping Pong. Why can't the wacky ones also have talent? Is that too much to ask for? Maybe she and Anthony will be the dark horses of the show and surprise us. Keep my fingers crossed.
4 of 16 | Posted by reckless_saturn_11 | Posted on January 16, 2010 12:08 PM
Oh holy crap I couldn't believe that Michael wasn't orange. It was so shocking to see him almost be a natural color. He looks so much better.
5 of 16 | Posted by reckless_saturn_11 | Posted on January 16, 2010 12:09 PM
I loved Emilio's dress, too cute!
Christiane's looked like something straight out of "She by Sheree"!! (That is NOT a compliment.)
Oh, and I had no idea that Ilan from TC was on Project Runway this season! No, seriously, did anyone else think Jonathan looked like Ilan in the interviews w/ the scruff and lame sunglasses??
6 of 16 | Posted by brattygrl | Posted on January 17, 2010 3:31 AM
I agree with you hutchlover, I was happy to see color return too.
Too many contestants to making tracking easy. During the introductory weeks, it would be nice if PR would flash a bug of the designer's face and name when their design walks down the runway.
7 of 16 | Posted by gerritv | Posted on January 17, 2010 10:55 AM
I liked the Ellie Mae Clampett comment.
Old Ham reminds me of a Young Evil Dick.
I don't know about Anthony. His shtick might get tiring real quick but he does have PERSONALITY. I think the verdict is still out on whether or not he has talent, taste or technical skills.
Great recap Flipit.
8 of 16 | Posted by Mr Dangerous | Posted on January 17, 2010 12:29 PM
Another season of Flipit and Project Runway? Yippee!
9 of 16 | Posted by wasabipeas | Posted on January 17, 2010 6:06 PM
There is nothing I like better then to curl up on the couch, as I start my nightshift
At the halfway house, with a carmello, camel lights and blackberry and reading
Your Recap of Project Runaway, which happens to be better then the live
Show. Already laughing on page 1, which makes living through the downloading of
Next 5 pgs bearable.
Oh so very happy!
Flipit you make sobriety fun!!
10 of 16 | Posted by noreality | Posted on January 17, 2010 9:57 PM
As always, you had me in hysterics all through the recap Flipit! "This one's doing the mash potato" screengrab was just priceless.
I thought that Jonathan was saying "gritty meets pretty" - and that phrase is going to get old fast.
Add me to the Anthony love train - gawd, he made me laugh. Agree with Reckless Saturn, I would like to see him have the skills to back up his great personality. I hope he stays around awhile! And agree with Gerri TV that there are too many folks to keep track of - love the idea of a bug while their design is on screen!
I was not impressed with Emilo's dreth before the show, but when it came out, I really did like it. I'm glad he won. Old Hambert in his best 1950 Johnny Cash outfit did not look pleased - but I thought his outfit was ok,just not the winner. Can't believe the judges liked PingPong's look. That's what I look like when I am too cheap to turn up the heat at home and drape myself in every sweater and afghan I own. Is this a case of the Emperor's New Clothes - everyone is afraid of saying the "innovative" designer's outfit is fugly?
I am so glad to be watching this season with youse guys - and Flipit I look foward to your witty recaps! Big hugs xoxoxoxo
11 of 16 | Posted by njgasmifan | Posted on January 18, 2010 8:25 AM
Flipit....you always make me laugh, but the caption "This one's doing the mashed potato" actually made me spit Coke on the monitor AGAIN!!!
Thanks for the lovely and as always funny recap!
Saw the promo for Kelly Cutrone's new show and I cannot wait for it. Please have someone recap it. Please! Please! Please!
Excellent recap! And I (heart) Anthony too!
12 of 16 | Posted by marijai | Posted on January 18, 2010 10:13 AM
Thanks for reading you guys!! This season has me all energized. It made me laugh out loud a few times and it hasn't done that for awhile. Long live PR!!
The Kelly Cutrone show will of course be recapped here, by the lovely and hilarious hypnotoad (of Desperate Housewives and The City recap fame).
And congrats on sobriety, no reality!! That's inspiring.
13 of 16 | Posted by flipit | Posted on January 18, 2010 11:57 AM
Oh, I was so excited to see this recap up this morning. And once again, Flipit, you did not disappoint. I spent literally seconds trying to decide between going to the gym or reading this recap while eating cheetos and my happy little orange fingers will tell you--I chose wisely...
14 of 16 | Posted by bluzgirl | Posted on January 18, 2010 12:47 PM
It's rare for me to like more than one thing, but personally, I loved the suit that straight guy did--unique, and the way the shirt fit inside, just so . . . wasn't crazy for the fabric, and in still pics, the front looks odd, but still, really liked it. Also liked the period zipper piece--I would have loved it if the zipper wasn't sitting on top, and was actually embeded. I realized it's kind of a giraffe neck knock off, but for whatever reason, works better than all those. He's douchy though, reminds me of the circus guy on Heros--HATE! And I did really like the winner--I didn't realize he had customized the fabric so much. Good job!
I found Besty's re do horrid--and she was lucky to escape bottom-hood . . . . gold dress with nude fabric looked like a plain skating dress. Type A's was typical, but the back was kinda cool, and the harlequin one, terrible . . . .was it me!?
Anyhoo, ever so graciously excited for a new season of recaps, and over all, seems wackier of a cast. Anthony's funny to me, but that dress . . . ugh . . . like Anna's vag dressed from that other PR ripoff show. Such an ugly fabric, I'm surprised they even put it in the park for them to select . . .
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO
15 of 16 | Posted by juddfan | Posted on January 19, 2010 12:51 PM
Oh my goodness. Another amazing recap. I am in the depths of depression from a failed romance, and you make me laugh every week, like a lighthouse in a storm....
16 of 16 | Posted by melissapedsrn | Posted on January 29, 2010 10:53 AM