Why is it every time I look at Jesus I think Naima from ANTM became a fashion designer?

I don’t understand this show. (I know…I say that at least twice a season. It’s still true.) Flamingay’s dress looked like something you’d see at the Oscars. And Pong should have been gone last week when she let her model’s ass hang out…and, worse, didn’t seem to expect it after having fit the dress. Did she forget to look at the back end?

And is it me, or do a lot of these garments seem ill-fitted…baggy….sloppy. Shouldn’t actually being able to sew and tailor things be part of the requirements for this show?

The $50 variation was supposed to be the “cost-conscious, everyday person.” Great. Bring in real people models then...meaning women who aren’t a size Minus Zero.

That still of the scrawny model made me sick. How is “Auschwitz Survivor” considered attractive or fashionable?

Poor Ping. I hated everything she designed, but at least she provided some entertainment, unlike most of the others.

I thought Anthony said he was "stacked, packed and ready to attack"?

hecks, honestly i couldn't tell. it sounded like "attayuhn", so that's what i wrote. hahah. and i am with you on pong. this will now be national pong day and i will walk around in only a sheet wrapped around me all day.

Ha, I can barely tell what he's saying most of the time, but I want him around til the end.
Well in that case I will celebrate by letting my ass hang out while eating some kung pao chicken later.

I tried celebrating National Pong Day by wearing a stiffened potato sack cut too short and slashed in the back, but I got tired of sticking to the chair when I sat down...

Flipit, funniest line of the recap... "The bottoms are called out." Only because Flamingay, Hambert, and supposed "Straight Guy" were called out. Something about that image made me almost spit out my Pudding cup at the computer.

Maybe I missed something, but when did Jesse assert he was straight? Or is he just less feminine than the other male contestants and that was an assumption on your part?

Either way, I thought he was a goner with all the asides he was given this episode. I'll miss Pong, and wish my ass could hang out all day, but, alas, I have to work!

Sad face.

Great recap, Flipper. Favorite line: They look like black and white comic book villains. hee hee

I agree - Mila's armpit stain poncho was hideous!

Well, any thoughts I had about working this afternoon flew out the window when I saw Flipit's incredibly fast recap! Great job as always - way too many hysterical jokes to pick out just one - let's just say you are snarkmaster supreme.

I'll confess to having no taste and liking Flamegay's outfit a bit. While it was not exceptional, I don't think it deserved the reaming it got. I would never wear Mila's outfit (I would look like a Hobbit) but I can see that it had an appeal. To be honest, NONE of these looked like $500 worth of fabric.

Flamegay's "don't act up in front of company" really made me - and Tim Gunn - laugh out loud. I adore him, and hope he lasts awhile.

I think the model who spoke up about not being fitted was Straight Guy's model - that's why she was trashing Pong. And what up with his anger? Haven't seen him in the top group at all, so where does he get off acting like he did? Someone needs anger management classes.

I liked your idea of dressing in memory of Pong, but I was afraid I would have an Isadora Duncan moment when I left the carpool, so I had to pass.

Flipit, your recaps add so much enjoyment to my boring, mundane, vodka fueled life. Thanks for the giggles!!! xoxoxox

Oh, and I would like to add, that Flamingay asking what he could have done differently was such a reasonable question and I was surprised that I hadn't (in my memory) heard any other contestant ask that before. But I didn't like their response of staying true to his vision and executing it, because I assumed he thought he'd done that. What dumbass judges! Just give some advice, instead of blowing smoke up the man's ass!

slutty_whore, I totally agree with you! Flamegay did not say it in a nasty or accusitory way, he genuninely wanted to hear their opinion. The British judge was a total git.

njgasmifan: too funny last week calling MIla a Romulan!!!! I can't look at her without thinking of it, tho the comic villans was also hysterical!!!!

As always, Flippy-mwah for the quick cap!!!

Too funny throughout, I so agree on the Romulan's coat--like MC Hammer's gym suit. I could see it reflecting her style, but bleeech, and Jonathan seemed a class act this epi--impressed with his skills and ability to hold his tongue. (nevermind Ben's ears . . . kah!)

Maya is also redeemed--the knock off, tho dead on copied, was an improvement, and so much work in both dresses--just wish Jay had stepped it up and not been so lax . . . burn . . . .

Nina nailed the Ping dress, frickin' nailed it, and after seeing it on the runway, exactly what did she do!? That model went on and on during the model show, they cut it down here . . .

and Yea, I said Christian Bale, but I didn't know the guy was gonna be so American Psycho!!! I find it very wrong to beat thy fists in the direction of a human, nevermind a woman . . . esp a childlike woman like Ping . . .

Overall, still thrilled with this season and soooo not bored!!! Lot's of fun and good stuff being done. Clearly Besty and Amish are beneath the skills of the others and the time is a tickin' . . . I did think the Amish comment about the death of their hope's and dreams was funny . . . she's probably very sarcastic, just hard to gather with all the editing!

Thanks again for posting so quick and letting us get it while it's hot!!!!

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXXO

Oy, with so many shows back on it's almost impossible to keep up with my DVR queue and recaps, but I try, I try... Flipit, you're a comic genius, and I love how now and then you show us your soft, sentimental side. You're really a big fluffy cottonball under all that snarkiness, I bet. I have been thinking for the last two episodes that, as much as I don't like RetHam's hair, makeup, nails, designs, and insistence that we use both his first and middle name, he is also a big fluffy cottonball and a very nice guy, and I like him for that.

I had to mull on what that "handlebars" caption means for a while, and I'm still not 100% sure that I got it, but the mental picture I'm getting from it ain't pretty (because Ben isn't) and hey, you're not wearing your Pong Memorial Day sheet in it, either. It also has you moving your legs bicycle-rider fashion, which I'm pretty sure can't possibly work in that situation, either. I'm totally confused (but then again, I'm a 40-year-old straight woman).

The funny thing about Jaysian slacking off is that he may not even have had immunity at all this episode. Check out Tim Gunn's blog for that. Poor Tim - he's confused just like me. And it looks like we have another Kenley-monster rearing up against Tim in the form of Emilioth! I'm so glad he's writing his blog again and we get the dish!

@juddfan - thank you so much - glad you think Mila looks like a Romulan, too! Must say, "like MC Hammer's gym suit" got a good guffaw out of me!!!!! oxox

Well, she does!!! hee . . .

oh yeah, did want to add I was very proud of old ham on the runway, very adult and mature of him to take it like a man!!! Maybe like sayhuh says, despite the trappings . . .

And sayhuh, "Handlebars" would be easier to get if you were a man and needed to guide something, in this case Ben's head, to take you where only calgon has gone before. (I know, I'm just making it worse)
And I suppose, as a woman, some guidance might also be in order . . . .

I'm off to read Tim's blog!

I'm also a straight 40-year old woman. When I saw those ears, I only thought about holding my, ahem, liquor (with eyes shut very tightly -- sorry Ben).

Yikes! I think Kors needs to get his face tightened.

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL, juddfan and Chips.N.Whips!! I suppose my confusion stemmed from the fact that I picture holding handlebars from the back, not the front... :-)

The first thing I thought of when I saw Mila's outfit coming down the runway was, "Somebody's skinned Shamu!" I was also reminded of a neighbor kid's overweight grandma who took a sewing class and made herself a frock with a similar look. I recall seeing her out the window and hailing my mother, "Come here, Grandma Dugas looks just like Shamu!" On another note, I was shocked to see Seth Aaron's bootblack fading into a big bald spot! I think he's subtracted about 10 years from his age. And Straight Guy? What straight young man in his 20s even knows who Balenciaga is, let alone get all excited over seeing one of his designs?

Slutty, I don't think Jesse (Straight Guy) has ever said he is straight, but he has mentioned having a girlfriend who is his inspiration.

Also, Retired Hambert is married with kids, I believe.

At least these straight guys don't have to remind us of it every other sentence.

@sayhuh:
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL, juddfan and Chips.N.Whips!! I suppose my confusion stemmed from the fact that I picture holding handlebars from the back, not the front... :-)

THIS is nearly as funny as Flipits recap. Now that I've pictured it from the back, especially with bicycle legs, I can't stop laughing.

Fab recap Flipit. I'll miss Pong.

see you guys?!? don't say you never learn anything here! hahah.
and yeah straight guy said he was straight, but it was in the intro videos on the liftetime site. i did a recap of them. it's in the archives and it's called meet the cast. we see his girlfriend and he says that he should be on pr cuz he's straight. then there's a dream sequence where he wakes up with a dude. you should watch those videos, cuz it's fun to watch the crazy train to hell these people take over the course of a season. and it's only epi three!!

Does Ben remind anyone else of a grown up version of Dewey from "Malcolm in the Middle?"

Chris March wrote a hysterical blog on the Lifetime site. Check it out y'all will get a giggle. Hey Flipit, you're not really Chris masquerading as a humble recapper are you? ;-)

I miss the wackadoodle guy.

These people are so fucking boring, the show is just a chore to sit through. It'd be one thing if any of them were actually creative, but so far, they're not.

So as long as they're going to be talentless hacks, they might as well say silly things.

Like wackadoodle.

Just an FYI - Ping never did recover her sketch book, at least not on tape. What American Psycho handed her was the envelope with the $500 in it!

2muchBravo-yes!!! N I'll check out Mr. March . . .

Itchy-somebody didn't eat their porridge!!! Design or no, they are at least good seamstresses! ;)

And fun comments too!

Well, I'm eating my porridge right now, and it's not helping.

Face it, the show is tired, the concept has been overdone, and this is television -- if they can't give us startling talent, at least give us people we can actually care about...and failing that, people we can have a good laugh at.

But it's just not there. None of these people stand out at all as individuals. At least Launch My Line had that horrid 'dandy' creature.

Major koodooz to 2MuchBravo for mentioning Chris March's blog- absolutely hysterical and must read for fans of this site.....

Best recap EVA! 4Real!!

The Christian Bale/ American Psycho analogy- dead on and flawless. Elian did the right thing in picking Amy, she's talented enough to save him.
I had no idea what was going on with the MC Hammer/ emperor penguin massacre that Ziggy eye Mila made but there wasn't much to choose from this episode.
And what was with Jay thinking that the Judges didn't know that he didn't do a damn thing on this challenge. It reminded me of the guy from last season who claimed a bird ate his paper dress or some smacked-out excuse. Don't these people watch the show before they come on. They should know that the judges have at least a little clue about what is happening in the work room.

Anyway, loved the recap, Keeps me laughing on the night shift and thanks for the shout out Flipit, you make a gal like me feel speeeecial.

XOXO

I actually thought Mila'a jacket was the coolest thing on this episode. It reminded me of a powerful woman walking around her huge house drinking scotch on ice....and smoking a cig. I like her style...kinda space odysseyish. She actually looks like she came straight off of a 60's space ship. (I'm sure 60's aliens had a different style from 90's aliens)