By the end of the "Search For The Next Doll" this week, I was frustrated, flim-flammed and flabbergasted. This week's lesson: it's a slippery slope to the destruction of a dream once you realize it's possible to fuck up.
This week's episode starts out like any other: shots of the morning sunrise, the Pussy Castle, and our remaining lovely ladies rising at 7am with renewed worries about being sent home. Chelsea in particular expresses her guilt about the Bad Karaoke Singer leaving. "I feel like I took away her dream," she says. Aw. Anastacia is still worried about her eating habits and I just want to slap her in the face and say "SHUT THE FUCK UP. You're making it worse for yourself!" but there's this terribly cold glass barrier separating the two of us. Oh well.
She and Chelsea then get into some kind of tiff about eating. Former chubster Chelsea laughingly laments Anastacia's sudden dieting, which sets off a li'l time bomb inside of Anastacia. Oh, girls of America, when will we all stop fucking caring about that thing called flesh on top of our bones and realize that it's the worrying about it that's the most unattractive? Sheesh. Anyway, Anastacia snips at her, stalks off, and Chelsea is left feeling miffed because she wasn't even insulting her. It's not like she called her a drag queen or anything.
"Reflux, right here."
Pussy Mail reveals that this week's theme is personal style. "We're sassy, but classy!" the PCDs sing as if in a high school cheerleading squad. Ha. Yeah, the epitome of class, right here.
Robin meets them in the dance studio and explains that for this week's challenge, they'll have to dance with the Pussycat Dolls. OMG! OMG! THE REAL PUSSYCAT DOLLS! But only four out of five of them will have the opportunity. Now, this leads me to wonder about the producers' intentions, because if they are organizing an event, and know there are five girls left, why do they only have enough room on the stage for four girls? Why didn't they just leave this challenge for next week? Well, that wouldn't be good television, that's why! So all the girls have to clamor over each other to impress Robin and Mikey enough with their dancing skills to be chosen for this high honor. This does not bode well for Chelsea.
Is that Melody or Asia??
"HEY GUYS LIKE MY NEW LEOPARD PRINT?!"
During rehearsals, Melissa struggles with her sex appeal, claiming that she never cared before, but now she's wondering what Daddy's gonna think. Did she and Chelsea trade bodies while I wasn't looking? Mikey chastises her for not wearing her boob pads. Excuse me, her what? I think we all know now what REALLY happened to Stripperella - she just got carried away with the boob pads!
"OH GOD, I CAN'T FEEL MY NIPPLES!"
"I must, I must, I must increase my bust!"
He also complains that Anastacia is a small personality in a big package. He says she makes "the smelly face." But, being the generous mentor that he is, he also gave her some sage advice: "just... be pretty." Unfortunately for Anastacia, insecurity kills every ounce of talent she used to beautifully display while whipping around her hair. Bummer.
The girls all pile into a bus on the way to the venue, and seem to go... nowhere before getting off the bus and lining up to perform for Robin. Was I the only one who thought it strange/a little creepy that they're doing this challenge in the parking lot? Huh.
"Okay, bitches, now get down on your knees and put your hands behind your head. It will all be over soon."
So the ladies go at it and, yeah, dance in the parking lot, apparently to the fastest song ever written. I am 92% sure I couldn't have done it. I am 100% sure Pisely would have eaten it on this one. But wouldn't it have been fun to see that happen?
"I know, Asia totally smells like fish, doesn't she?"
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Comments (12)
NOOOOOOOOOOOO
1 of 12 | Posted by KHA | Posted on April 12, 2007 4:34 PM
yay for another funny recap. i've been waiting since tuesday to read this. i wish they would have sent asia home. and was it just me, or was everyone on the show super annoying?
2 of 12 | Posted by helen | Posted on April 12, 2007 4:50 PM
I'm sad... Let it be known that I had a huge girl-crush on Anastacia.
3 of 12 | Posted by poodle![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.tvgasm.com/shows/nav-commenters.gif)
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Posted on April 12, 2007 6:12 PM
I also thought she said "Beaver." haha!
4 of 12 | Posted by goodAg![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.tvgasm.com/shows/nav-commenters.gif)
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Posted on April 12, 2007 7:18 PM
Why did the Pussycat Dolls need back up dancers? I was under the impression that Nicole already had 4, and didn't need another 3.
5 of 12 | Posted by Tiffany | Posted on April 12, 2007 9:35 PM
Melissa S is a loser and I have hated her since Making the Band. She wasn't good enough for Diddy so she damn sure aint good enough for me! I only sporatically watch this show bc I am totally in love with Mikey Minden. LOVE him!
6 of 12 | Posted by cece | Posted on April 13, 2007 7:44 AM
Melissa S is a loser and I have hated her since Making the Band. She wasn't good enough for Diddy so she damn sure aint good enough for me! I only sporatically watch this show bc I am totally in love with Mikey Minden. LOVE him!
7 of 12 | Posted by cece | Posted on April 13, 2007 7:44 AM
O. Snapp, we are so on the same wavelength it's scary. I heard "Beaver" too!
Anastacia was my favorite to win, too. She is gorgeous. I'm sad to see her go, but I'm hoping Chelsea can pull out an under-dog win. She can actually sing!
Melissa S. and Asia drive me crazy. Be gone with them!
8 of 12 | Posted by Mrs.Meow | Posted on April 13, 2007 8:25 AM
Melissa S. IS the devil!! Really, if she can't make it into DANITY KANE (Making of the Band 3 REJECT!) she surely isn't good enough to be back up to Nicole S.!!! Asia sucks, too. Please send those two home ASAP!
I am sad that Anastacia went home, I really liked her, and her lack of confidence really messed up how powerful she could have been. Chelsea is my favorite favorite!! Teach her how to pop her ass and then watch her blossom!! ;o)
9 of 12 | Posted by sunshine858619![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.tvgasm.com/shows/nav-commenters.gif)
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Posted on April 13, 2007 10:04 AM
Maybe I misunderstood the point of this show, but I thought they're looking for a replacement for Nicole. Isn't she going solo??
10 of 12 | Posted by Jen | Posted on April 13, 2007 11:05 AM
I heard that Asia is gonna win :( I hope it is untrue! I dislike Asia and her mouth haha it just bugs the hell out of me. They said that Melissa R. and Asia are gonna be the top 2 but that Asia wins it.
11 of 12 | Posted by Mimi | Posted on April 14, 2007 5:49 PM
Arite...i've posted my comment b4 but it didnt take... so here is mua again!!!
O. SNAPP... I LAUGHED my ass out... i was in tears, I was at work/desk and had to call somebody to get away from a psycho image. ANYWAY...
i really liked anastacia, too bad she left... Melissa S... please... shes too fake... and a "devil" (quote fr up dere). And why would PCD take a danity kane reject??? dats like pcd is saying danity kane is better dan dem!!! (rite??!?!???)glad to see her go! Chelsea, i jus cant like her. I dnt see wat dere is to like bout her. Yeah, she cute.. but i think shes a lil snobby. Asia... mayn, i think shed be the perfect bet if she didnt have da tweakin seizure hand, bubblegum 2front teeth, and wannabe gangsta accent... euwww. What is up wid dat chic??!???
but I love love love melissa R..., i dnt think shes as pretty as the others ... but shes got the best voice & she can move her ass... but hey.. she still growing!!!
but again... jus wanna share dat i cant (til now) stop laughin at that blog... props to u!
12 of 12 | Posted by exotiKa![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.tvgasm.com/shows/nav-commenters.gif)
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Posted on April 17, 2007 7:42 PM