We flashback to Kimmie in the studio. It's just as hideously entertaining as ever. Dallas basically tries to reason with Kim, telling her if she's serious she's going to have to go to country music "boot camp". That means no going out, no drinking...and no smoking. Dallas knows full well she's puffing away while he lays this down for her too. "I understand," Kimmie tells him, a little exasperatedly. As if to say, do you understand, Dallas Austin? The name Big Poppa mean anything to you? "I'm a hard worker," Kimmie tells Dallas defensively. Well, work as hard as you want, you're not gonna grow a good voice. Dallas smoothly avoids the issue, reminding her of the time commitment, and also that she's a Mom.

None of which deters Kim. "My kids aren't gonna stop me," she says defiantly, "Kids don't block you from your dreams." You hear that, world? Motherhood's got nothing on Kim's completely realistic dreams of becoming a famous country music singer who isn't known for having big boobs.

200811240155
There's a factory that makes Grammys, right? Just buy me one and cut the lectures.

For Kimmie, all it comes down to vocal coach Jan's assessment about the "crack in the foundation", but "whatever, I'll get in my won space and figure out what Kim needs to do to get to where Kim needs to be." Meaning, forget Dallas and Jan and NeNe and all those people who think carrying a tune has anything whatsoever to do with becoming a famous country music singer. Clearly they're just haters.

And on to our other resident pretend career made possible by a rich dude in Atlanta, it's Sheree. Sheree is on the phone with Michael Knight, designer of the perfect hot pant on Project Runway. Sheree makes sure we know she used her connections to get Michael on the phone, and tells him the story of the disastrous "viewing". She complains that she's running into people who all tell her they can do things, but they're not coming through in the end. Much like Kim, forget anyone who says that she needs to know anything about design to be a fashion designer. Sheree's only mistake is hiring the wrong people.

Sheree sucks up to Michael Knight, which couldn't have been easy for her, and begs him to meet with her and guide her. In other words, lend a modicum of credibility to her crackpot fashion line. They make a plan to meet up the next day.

200811240157
Then she scored a touchdown and lifted a car with one arm.

Over at NeNe's (Yay! I miss NeNe already...), she's writing a heartfelt letter to Curtis. She looks like a little kid doing her homework at the kitchen table while Gregg patiently putters around the kitchen. She invites him over to hear what she's got so far. She tells Curtis that she's sorry the DNA results weren't in their favor, but she still considers him her father. Gregg nods sagely/supportively, as usual, and throws in a "You have to step up and move on." NeNe tells us she's not sure if there's a journey for her to discover who her Dad really is.

Over at the Hartwells, they're all gathered in the kitchen for baby feeding. Strained Peas & Spit Up? I don't know, the event, oddly, isn't named. Clearly, this Oakland thing's got Lisa thrown. Sure enough, she's complaining about it and Ed's telling her they'll work it out like they "always do". Enter NeNe to remind us that Lisa and Ed haven't been married that long, and in her observation, you have to have a very strong foundation to be married to an athlete. NeNe, so wise.

Lisa tells Ed how worried she is about him getting injured, ending with her real concern, which is that she doesn't want to end up pushing him around in a wheelchair. You know Lisa's just selfish enough to really mean it too, which is a little disgusting. She assures him that she'd do it though. Honoring that whole "through sickness and health" thing. What a sport.

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Sickness, health, and a LOT of money.

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Comments (20)

Snootchy Bootches:

It sucks that I am not able to watch these episodes anymore. :( But I appreciate the recaps to keep me up on what happened to these bitches.

Big Poppa was bound to end things with Kimmie. I figured he would do it after this season started to air though. After all, everyone knows who he is and that he is married. Life can't be easy for him because I bet his wife knows how to google!

mrsc:

Thanks for the great recap Snootchy Bootches but all's I can think of is-I... CANNOT... WAIT... UNTIL...THE...REUNION... SHOW !!!

FruityLoops:

Great recap as always! Loved it! This episode seemed to end pretty peacefully, so what's up with the reunion show? Has Kim faked cancer since the show stopped taping? (not that I would put it past her) Everyone seems to be on her case. I guess I'll have to watch and find out!

Did anyone see The Bonnie Hunt Show today? She did a spoof of RHOA where she was Kim. It was scary how a wig and a push up bra transformed her into our Kim. Funny!

shantigal:

Chickbomb:

Fabulous recap as always. Cannot wait for the reunion show. Wow, give these hags a shot at doing the right thing, and they do not disappoint. They remained catty and classless to the end. Except for NeNe. She seems to be the only "Real Housewife" on the show.

I sure hope Kim wears underwear for the reunion show 'cuz it looks like there will be a major throw down.

LAjane:

I'm so excited for the reunion! A fake cancer scare, threats of violence, adultery = fantastic entertainment.

Snootchy Bootches - I may be the only one who doesn't know, but who is this Big Poppa?

Snootchy Bootches:

Apparently it is a guy named Lee Najjir who is a big time real estate developer in the South. He does all of those shopping outlet malls down there. He is apparently well known in the entertainment circles also and his son is affiliated somehow with The Hills, but I don't recall how.

pixielated:

Fruity Loops, doesn't Kim say somethiing about Lisa's kids? Isn't that what starts it?

tati:

Chickbomb! great recap (I especially loved your Kim caption at the end). Can't wait for tonight's reunion!! I also heard the same as Pixierelated, that Lisa snapped on Kim (and may have even slapped her!) because Kim supposedly told the media that Lisa doesn't have custody of her older kids due to alleged drug use.

Also, I hope Kim is not explaining her weave away as a result of cancer....I recently saw a clip of Kim at age 24 on that old show, Hot or not (i forget what it was called) but there she was, our Kimmie, weaved and apparently Botoxed as ever. Where does she get her $$$, anyway? Maybe it's her divorce settlement. I guess I shouldn't have been surprised that she and granny panty-loving Big Poppa have called it quits (maybe that's why we stopped seeing that Escalade?) Maybe all this publicity finally got to his wife. They only dated 7 months, that surprised me more than anything--from the way Kim talked about him, I got the impression that they dated longer than that.

I enjoyed this season more than I thought I would have, I will miss Nene! This season really did have some good dudes, they were all pretty cool right?

OK, onto the Reunion!!
PS---in that shot of DeShawn & Eric shooting hoops, what is up w/ her shirt, it's only got one sleeve (check out her left arm)? Weird style, just wondered if anyone else noticed that, it was bugging me, like she ripped it off.

jocelynd99:

Just wanted to say how much I enjoy your recaps! They rock and I always agree with your thoughts on these diamond-encrusted peaches!

yeschef:

"They only dated 7 months, that surprised me more than anything--from the way Kim talked about him, I got the impression that they dated longer than that."

Remember this is Kim. She looks to have had and from what Lisa says in the Reunion episode a habit of spreading her legs to married older men. So odds are she has had several Big Poppas maybe at the same time. This would confuse Kim to no end.


"Weird style, just wondered if anyone else noticed that, it was bugging me, like she ripped it off."

May just have been the camera angle and how she was positioning her arms, oh course the sleeve may have just rolled up from the movements of her.

featherhead:

I cannot wait for the reunion tonight either! Here's the scoop as I know it.
1. Kim and Sheree went to a movie set as extras (they were all invited, but only Kim and Sheree went), the movie had Demi Moore in it and Kim told her that Lisa is a cokewhxxe who lost her kids, Demi reported it back to Lisa who then went off on Kim (slapped her) and Kim went and got a lawyer and a restraning order against Lisa.
2. Kim reports that she and big poppa have been together for three years and are engaged. He bought her a 5-carat carnary yellow diamond ring. But now are broken up.
3. Kim says that three years ago she was sick and lost 20 pounds and her hair broke off, and the doctors thought it MIGHT be cancer, but was not. That's why the tacky wig. Smells like bs to me....

hello.kitty:

Can DeShawn please use some of her money to see a dentist about getting her mouth to open when she talks?? Does anyone else see the resemblance of Sheree to comedian Tommy Davidson?? Go Team NeNe!

old school dude:

Why does everyone love Nene so much? All she does is spout platitudes and ghetto wisdom with no heart or brains behind it. Also, Gregg seems like a nice-if long suffering-guy, but everytime Nene asks his advice she shuts him down and says she's going to do what she wants.
Too many people mistake loudness and rudeness for personality. Give me a break.
Mind you, I'm not saying she's any worse than the other wives, she just isn't any better.

atlblues:

Okay, i live in Atlanta & let me tell you these "ladies" are not even remotely close to being consider the social elite. The restaurant they are in at the beginning of this episode is The Clubhouse at Lenox not the cheesecake factory.

i cannot wait until the reunion tonight!! i too wish Shawnee would open her mouth when she speaks and stop smiling that retarded smile all the time.

Rumor here in the ATL -- Nene doesn't live in the same house as in the show, it was rented for the show; Sheree lives in an apartment; & Kim's big poppa is Lee Najjar -- who is married with a wife named Kim. i kind of feel sorry for her!

NYCJUDE:

For all her talk of being "classy", Sheree is guilty of the worst low class bad habit---using "ax" instead of "ask". On one episode, Sheree said about NeNe,"have you SAW her?" The grammar and incorrect word usage of all four of these women are horrifying.

BTW--did anyone catch The Bonnie Hunt show sketch with Neicy Nash as NeNe and Bonnie as Kim?? Hysterical!!

Neecy:

Yes, nycjude, I was wondering when someone was going to comment on "have you SAW her?"
Sheree is a mystery to me. After watching the last show and the reunion show, I realized that Sheree just says random stuff and it really doesn't make sense, and she says it with such conviction you think you are missing something.. but nothing is really being said.

Neecy:

Yes, NYCJUDE, I was wondering when someone was going to comment on "have you SAW her?" Totally unbelievable that someone who speaks so poorly can consider themselves so classy. Ugghh!!

old school dude:

Oh come on people. Why pick on poor old Sheree? None of these over financed-under cultured women have any class. They flaunt their excesses as if buying too much and spending the day in over priced spas somehow makes them important. At the least sign of conflict out come the fists and four letter words. Ladies, you may be common, rude and vulgar, but at least you're really ignorant too!
Bless your hearts.

reckless_saturn_11:

REUNION?????? CHICKBOMB, REUNION???? are you going to bless us with a re-cap? please and thank you if you. your recaps this season have been damn right funny and spot on in its snarky observations. can you give this addict one more fix with the reunion re-cap?

i hope you had some happy flying trips during the thanksgiving holiday. no too many cranky customers pissing off the chickbomb.

D_Bomb:

D_Bomb, I've been a fan since I googled HWOA and happened on your page, however; you're getting close to looking like a bigot. I don't mind it when you quote the housewives' actual language mishaps but when you make up your own I am reminded of Jack Nicholson's characater in As Good As It Gets doing his versiona of Amos or Andy when talking to Cuba Gooding's character; he says something about MO-lasses. I giggled at that scene btw, so I do have a sense of humor.

Neecy: It would seem that if one intends to make a big deal out of another's poor language skills, that one might want to make sure their own is without fault. In post #17 you write, "Totally unbelievable that someone who speaks so poorly can consider themselves so classy." I don't know what it's called, but if the words someone and themselves are referring to the same subject, their quantity should be in agreement; in other words, both should be singular or plural. Someone is singular, themselves is plural. It is a common mistake. Also, if we are nitpicking, That sentence should have started with the words It is or the contraction, it's.

NYCdude: Your grammar and word usuage is almost perfect but don't throw anymore stones, k? I have a friend of 25 years who grew up on Long Island who uses ax instead of ask and I tease her about it from time to time but we both accept that it as a colloquialism and laugh. I'm not using perfect grammar here due to time restraints. As good as I am, I accept that when I'm speaking casually, I use slang and colloquialisms and poor grammar because it is so widely accepted. Face it, Americans need to take a refresher course in grammar and pronounciation. It seems to me you white people couldn't wait to nitpick and fault find these black housewives. Give yourselves a refresher and tune in to the loud, brassy, declasse HWOOC. The white women waste tons on money on plastic surgery in addition to all the ways the black hws wasted money. I didn't know about this site until atl but I bet none of you went on and on about how declasse and prone to poor grammar the white housewives are. Don't get me started on the New Yorkers, pretentious bitches all. Mmmkay?

I'm still a fan, chickbomb bc ur as real as a culturally clueless uppity bitch can be (and u admitted it from the beginning)which is why i let ur name inspire mine. I'll be watching you. Love, Joni

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